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I admit, I'm one of those kooky people who started dating some stranger I met online—then ended up marrying him!
I still feel embarrassed whenever I tell our story. That's because it wasn't just the Internet that brought my husband, Alexei, and me together, but it was the personal ad I placed there. I used to swear I'd never do such a thing; I thought it was silly and hinted at desperation. Plus I was certain that was no way to meet a healthy individual and develop a real, lasting relationship. But one evening, God's nudging changed all that.
When I placed that ad, I was 28 and had just gotten out of a dead-end relationship with a man who made me miserable. He wasn't a Christian, but because I was "so in love," I remained in the relationship, hoping he'd change. Then one evening I got fed up with the way he treated me and finally broke up with him. Later that night, I was online and saw an advertisement for free personal ads. On a "whim," I decided to place one. It read: "Never married Christian woman seeking a good Christian man for friendship … maybe more? I love antiquing, theatre, music, books, and horseback riding. E-mail me."
I heard from lots of guys. Perhaps because I'd placed my ad on a secular site, not all of them were Christian—even though I'd specified I am. Some men wrote and offered a barely cursory description of their looks and then asked me for a photo—which I didn't supply. I never heard from them again. I exchanged e-mails with a few other guys for nearly a month before they asked for my photo—which I didn't supply. And I never heard from them again. Only two guys wrote to me repeatedly and didn't mind that I wasn't willing to share a photo of myself right away. They understood that I wanted to get to know them better before taking that step.
Because of this understanding and patience, I exchanged phone numbers with one of these men, "Richard." I was talking on the phone with him when Alexei e-mailed me. I remember his e-mail distinctly, although I was disappointed by his age (at 24, he was four years younger than I, and I just knew I never could have a long-term relationship with a younger guy!). His note was simple, sweet, and to the point. Later I discovered Alexei was just as surprised he responded to an ad as I was that I placed one. Less than a month after I posted the ad, Alexei found himself lonely and bored one evening. He saw a link on the bottom of his Internet service provider's screen that read: "Meet new people!" On a "whim," he clicked the link and happened upon my ad. That night he wrote me.
We began e-mailing and instant-messaging each other regularly, and enjoyed long conversations about our faith, families, work, and priorities. We even discussed our views on marriage. Alexei and I discovered our thoughts on important issues—such as marriage, God, and the Bible—were quite similar, a refreshing change from the other men with whom I'd corresponded.
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