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Thirty years ago, the inaugural issue of Today's Christian Woman featured Anita Bryant on the cover. This 38-year-old former beauty pageant queen loved Jesus and stirred controversy as she campaigned against gay rights. And she foreshadowed the Superwoman Syndrome (the pressure to simultaneously do all and be all) that would seize countless women in the decades to come.
That first issue of TCW also featured articles on becoming a vegetarian, knowing your true identity, and relating to men at work and in marriage. To discover how much has changed (or not) in the past three decades, we gathered four 30-year-olds (all born the same year as TCW!) to find out what's on the heart of today's Christian women.
Does our generation still suffer from the Superwoman Syndrome?
Kate: I absolutely don't feel like I have to do it all, all at the same time. Now, do I want to? Yes. But there's a big difference between wanting to and having to.
I know I have limits and that I need to set boundaries.
JeJee: I'm okay with saying "no" to outside pressures and expectations. I can do what's best for me and my family, and it's okay that the dishes aren't done and the house isn't always clean. I don't feel the pressure to have everything perfect.
Tanya: I think we have a lot more conversations these days about balance as a culture, as a church, as friends. I think that's partly a reaction to those in the previous generation who we watched get stressed out from the pressure to do it all. I think we're realizing we can't do it all, or do anything well when we're trying to do it all.
Is balance a new value for our generation?
Tanya: I know it's a value for me and my friends. Yes, we want to do things well. But we also recognize we're too busy for our own good and that we need to cut back and have margin. Though, I think we'll probably always struggle with achieving that balance.
Clarissa: One thing now is that there's more than one "right." For every book on the shelf at Barnes & Noble about how we should be go-get-'em, self-actualizing women, there's another book about embracing life as a mom at home.
I was just reading about the book The Mommy Brain, which says motherhood is the most stimulating experience we'll ever have. But then another book says motherhood numbs our brain. As a mom, sometimes I'm not sure if I'm numb or hyper-stimulated.
It seems those dueling messages create a different challenge.
Clarissa: Yes. In some ways it's more difficult because I want to do things the right way. But I think we're realizing there may not be one best way. There's a best way for me, but it may not fit everybody else's expectation.
Like our parents' expectations?
JeJee: Right. My mom tells me, "When I was young, I had both you and your brother bathed and the house cleaned every day by noon." I'm like, That's great for you. But I'm fine not having the house squeaky clean. As long as we have clean dishes to eat on, I'm comfortable saying "no" to other expectations.
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