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Displaying 1–12 of 12 comments

Tony Armour

December 12, 2013  10:51am

Great article!

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Jennifer Ellen

November 22, 2013  9:11am

Richard, there is (at least) one other option - white's can acknowledge the privilege we have enjoyed of being race-*un*conscious, and can develop that consciousness in ways that stand with and raise up those who have not enjoyed that privilege. Being conscious of all that is entailed in my whiteness does not demand that I must identify only with whites. It gives me the opportunity to be more aware both of myself and of the other, and to help diffuse the affects my privilege has had on both myself and others.

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Richard Magnus

November 15, 2013  10:35am

By the time these children are grown, whites won't be a "majority" in the U.S. We have two choices - a) whites can become race-conscious and openly favor their own kind, like the other races do, thus plunging society into conflict and strife, or b) the other races can give up their race-consciousness and open favoritism, and embrace the sort of "color-blind" ethic that's been the officially-stated policy for whites. Whether we live in a harmonious and peaceful society 20 years from now depends on what the non-whites now choose. It's still racism, no matter who does it to whom.

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Doranna Cooper

November 14, 2013  3:52pm

Great article and thanks for Nancy Lee's comments, very helpful.

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Nancy Lee

November 10, 2013  3:02pm

As a family who first had biological children, then adopted transracially, I have to say that we did with our first kids what most Caucasian families do: never discussed race, except to say general things like "all people are equal in God's sight." Boy, do we Caucasians need to do more than that! We need to help all of our kids understand the persecution and terror experienced by African-Americans and Native Americans, and other people of color, and be specific with our terminology. Now that we have beautiful brown children too, we receive lots of questions in public. And we are careful about how we respond to strangers' idle curiosity -- our kids need to know that they have no obligation to tell strangers their history. We smile and ask "why do you want to know?" and most often say, "Sorry, but we don't share our children's private information with people we just met." It is our job to be polite and kind, but model good boundaries for our kids.

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audrey ruth

November 08, 2013  11:51pm

This is an encouraging article. I remember the uproar among the African American community when The Blind Side came out in theaters. Many acted like it was a tragedy that Michael Oher was taken in by a white family. Today, though, he is a very successful adult, playing for the Baltimore Ravens after graduating from college. I know many multi-ethnic families, my church is blessed to have many such families, so I did not think anything about Oher's story except gratitude for him - and for those who took him in and were blessed to be his adoptive family. The Bible says that we who are the children of God have been adopted into His forever family (Romans 8). To me this is what adoption reflects, regardless of ethnicity.

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Audrey F

November 08, 2013  8:36am

Great article! My parents taught me from an early age never to judge a person by their skin color. As an African American woman I have seen my share of prejudice and have experienced it first hand. It is not a pretty sight and sometimes, if you allow it, you may never recover from the hurt and rejection. Being as Christian has taught me to forgive and pray for those people because they will be the ones to face God's judgment in the end if they don't change. I applaud your efforts in teaching your children to hold their heads up high and to be proud of who they are and who their parents are. This world is only our temporary home and when we get to heaven none of those things will matter there.

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Dee Dock

November 07, 2013  1:25pm

My biological child does not look like me. I am a fair-skinned blonde, and she has dark hair, dark eyes, and a beautiful Mediterranean tan like her father. I am a single mom and my daughter lives with me. Whenever we are out, I get a lot of stares and double takes. I have experienced numerous times, when she was a fussy baby and in the terrible twos, the genuine concern of bystanders of whether I was a kidnapper, a babysitter, or child abuser. No one ever makes the assumption that I am her biological mother. And what exacerbates the situation is that I was in my 40s when she was born. As I am getting older, I'm sure many people think she could be my grandchild. I am amazed that in this day and age people still stare and have no manners in regards to this situation. I've even had teachers send home materials with my daughter that are written in Spanish because they falsely assume she is of hispanic origin or that her parents' primary language is Spanish. Fortunately, I could translate.

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Amanda Nease

November 07, 2013  8:29am

Thank you for writing this article! I've received so many questions when people see me, a white woman, walking through the store with 2 white children and 1 black child. I've had more questions than I ever expected….most of them have not been positive…even from fellow believers. I have received the stares and glares. Yet, through it all, "Modeling for my children how to be a minority has a bigger purpose than merely learning how to have dark skin in a white world. My lessons are about how to wear Christ's skin." This is the cry of my heart! Jesus is worth it! All of my children are worth it!

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Laura Snider

November 06, 2013  1:54pm

Thanks for your reflections. My husband and I have experienced those same double takes when we're out with our two children. It's a problem when people think of you and your children as "them" vs. "us." My husband and I are the ones who love, nurture, and care for these kids every day. We're not raising someone else's children-- we're raising our children. God put our family together, and even though we want our children to be proud of their heritage and learn how to navigate both cultures, we also want them to know, down to their core, that God made them to be our daughter and son. Skin color doesn't matter one bit when my toddler climbs up on my lap to read a book, or my baby looks up at me with love in his eyes, and touches my face.

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Christine Thomas

November 06, 2013  1:47pm

My parents adopted seven, making a total of nine siblings. Five of us are white, four are black. My parents are white. I remember once in the grocery store my father caught someone staring. He calmly said to them "my first wife." We are all middle aged now and as close if not closer than most biological sibling groups I know of. It becomes more clear as we grow older and take turns caring for our parents that we belong to a family that God put together. We grew up with thick skins and it binds us together. The things people said were never as frightening as the cross burned on our lawn. And our African American community embraced us, taught my mother how to handle black hair, schooled us on what racism looks like and loved us. That was in 1967. We are still a family.

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Patricia Pope

November 06, 2013  1:33pm

I can remember going to the mall with my brother, sister-in-law who is white and their kids and having a white mother with her son stare at them. The she mouthed to her son, as if no one can read lips, "That's their mother." I guess as an African-American who lives in two worlds, I don't do too many double-takes at diverse situations such as interracial couples and multi-racial children. On the other hand, I notice that those who live a little more isolated life tend to stare and gawk. If nothing else, have they not been taught the impoliteness of this? I mean, people do realize that you're doing this. After a while, it can make one feel like an animal in a zoo--having people stare at you as though you're on exhibit.

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