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Displaying 1–14 of 14 comments


January 12, 2014  4:27pm

I'm wondering why so many men feel compelled to come on Her.meneutics and leave stupid comments about women and women's issues. There are plenty of other blogs where men are perfectly welcome to hang out and be immature, it would be nice if women could come to Christianity Today's WOMEN'S BLOG and not have to read idiotic male comments about how all our insecurities are well-founded. I would like to respectfully ask all the men who are not here to try to learn something so they can better relate to the women they love, to just please go find another place to spout off your opinions. It hinders real conversation between women and more thoughtful men about things that to matter to us to have to wade through a bunch of sexist comments and responses to them. Anyway. Great post. I too wish my long-distance friends sent Christmas cards with their pictures or used their own photos not their kids or other avatars for FB. I miss seeing many of them.

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Leanne Hardy

December 28, 2013  2:46pm

This skinny=beauty is a cultural thing. In many cultures fat=beautiful because it means prosperous, i.e. enough to eat.

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Samantha Blythe

December 27, 2013  4:52pm

Sure, most wives want to look good for their husbands...and I would hope most husbands also care how they look to their wives. But the fact is that a woman's body goes through many changes through her childbearing years and then with regular aging, and so "looking good" is going to be relative to that for most of us. Most people, even regular exercisers, gain at least some weight over time and lose the beautiful body of youth, and I am not talking about gluttony. There can be thin gluttons, and gluttony is not limited to food. I stand by what I said regarding husbands expectations of their wives, seen through a Biblical lens, and will also add that beauty, while acknowledged in the Bible, is absolutely not always the kind of outward thing we call it.

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Richard Thompson

December 25, 2013  8:26pm

Liz, the vast majority of men prefer skinny women as opposed to fat women. You don't have to have an extremely physically fit body and be super thin to look attractive, just don't be fat. It doesn't take an hour at the gym to have a healthy body, even 15 minutes of exercise is enough...pop in an exercise video and just go with it!

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Richard Thompson

December 25, 2013  8:22pm

Samantha Is gluttony not a sin? Why wouldn't a wife want to look good for her husband? The fact of the matter is that men prefer women who are skinny as opposed to women who are fat. A woman doesn't have to be super thin to look attractive, just don't be fat.

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Liz T

December 25, 2013  3:16pm

Richard, I have to disagree with you there. Some men might find a woman beautiful even if she is not skinny. Most American women are not super-thin, like Hollywood would like you to believe. I think that everyone should make it a priority to have healthy bodies, men and women alike. Some women just don't have time to exercise an hour everyday and have an extremely physically fit body. I think that it's a problem when women should feel like they have to make their husbands happy by looking perfect for them. Like I said, we should ALL strive to be healthy, not just physically fit.

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Samantha Blythe

December 23, 2013  7:43pm

Richard, it doesn't say anywhere in the Bible that a woman should make sure her body fits the mold of whatever her husband thinks is attractive. What it does is tell men to be satisfied always with the breasts of their wives ;-)

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Richard Thompson

December 23, 2013  11:38am

Being overweight might not effect how your kids see you, but it definitely effects how the rest of society views you, including your friends and your husband. I understand what the article is trying to getting at, but it is largely wishful thinking that has little to do with reality. The fact of the matter is that men are happier in their marriages when their wives are more physically attractive and women should make it a priority to have healthy bodies.

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Jennifer Grant

December 20, 2013  11:27am

You do have a beautiful soul Marlena. And I love this piece. Wonderful! Thank you for your vulnerability and for sharing this. I know so many of us will relate!

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Bronwyn Lea

December 19, 2013  3:09pm

Marlena, thank you for a brave and beautiful post. Just this morning I was looking at the Christmas cards we have received from friends and thinking "I love to see pictures of my friends' children, but GOSH I love it when the photo also includes pictures of my FRIEND!" Loved this line: "I've realized that even when I was thinner, I was critical of my photographed self." Yep, me too. I've been struggling with photos which capture my rapidly graying hair (and decided to embrace the gray - story of this here... http://wp.me/p3zH10-d8), but your words about the reminder of inner beauty and maturity are just what my heart needed today.

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Dorothy Greco

December 19, 2013  2:55pm

Jason Whittington, Your comment is rude and mean. I urge you to please be more thoughtful before you address comments to someone you don't even know.

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Marlena Graves

December 19, 2013  2:25pm

Hi Jason, Thank you for taking the time to read the post and make a comment. I am wondering if you happened to miss this line: "Or maybe I'm set off by catching a glimpse of myself in a picture and am surprised to find that I look heavier than I feel—especially since I don't eat too badly and try to exercise." But maybe you didn't miss it. I should say that I do exercise and eat pretty well. Maybe I should've made that more clear. And I do agree with you about the Bible's warning about being rich. That is why I said this is me at my worst-in my weakest moments. You may be interested to read the post the Caryn Rivadeneira, Rachel Stone, and I wrote about poverty and riches. http://www.christianitytoday.com/women/2013/november/things-brok e-people-do.html Blessings to you.

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Elise Hilton

December 19, 2013  11:07am

Jason, as a woman who exercises and watches what she eats, I also know that women - almost without exception - have body issues. We are bombarded with air-brushed models who literally starve themselves as the pinnacle of beauty. Women need to be told they are beautiful because they are made in God's image and likeness, to care for the bodies God gifted us with, and to know we are of value. Snarky comments about working out don't help.

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Jason Whittington

December 19, 2013  10:56am

Instead of desiring to be rich (which the Bible warns about) in order to pay for plastic surgery, why don't you exercise and watch what you eat?


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