I used to tell one of my children, "You have an attitude problem." Needless to say, such remarks only made the situation worse.

A bad attitude can create absolute misery. We may feel that our attitude is justified, but it still makes us miserable. How does a person respond to someone with a bad attitude?

The dictionary defines attitude as "a posture or manner of carrying oneself, indicative of a mood or condition, a state of mind or feeling." How we present ourself to the world has a great deal to do with the state of our soul. And it can have enormous impact on the world around us.

One bad attitude can disable the atmosphere of an entire office. Discussion among employees often revolves around how to handle the disagreeable individual.

An attitude problem can grow from many causes, but I would guess it often stems from deep-seated anger. When I am honest with myself, my attitude problems begin with an interior dialogue that sounds a lot like grumbling.

And grumbling is frequently associated with frustration—often because we are trying to do too much in too short a time period. Frustration is the daily companion of any perfectionist. Nothing is ever good enough for a perfectionist. The rest of us just have a patience problem. Our impatience leads to frustration. Our frustration leads to anger. And anger gives root to bad attitudes.

Jesus addresses an attitude problem in the parable of the vineyard (Matt. 20:1-16). It's a story that takes place in a work context where a group of employees think they aren't being treated fairly. You know the story. The owner chooses people to work throughout the day to finish a job. When it comes time to pay each person, those who worked the last hour are paid the same as those who worked all day.

Those who worked all day are incensed at the apparent injustice, but the owner claims he has paid them what he promised. He asks, "Do you begrudge my generosity?" (Matt. 20:15).

In many respects these workers had lost their sense of perspective. The fact they were picked to work at all was an experience of pure grace. They certainly were not entitled to being picked over the others.

The owner chooses to be generous to a few. Those who have worked all day have a choice. They can either remain angry or be grateful for the owner's generosity. Even those who worked only an hour will have enough money to feed their families that day.

Often we lose perspective in terms of the many gifts we have received, the most important gift being God's generous love. Living in the grace of God can reduce frustration, perfectionism, and anger. It changes the way we present ourselves to the world … and our attitude toward life itself.