Where Are You Looking?

Jeanette Gardner Littleton, managing editor of Building Church Leaders Quarterly is this issue’s guest columnist.

I was excited when my husband entered the pastorate again. Mark had been a pastor several years before we met. I’d been a lay leader, worked in a denominational headquarters, and, with Mark, served as co-director of Christian education in a good-sized church.

We moved halfway across country and settled in; the small church situation was sweet. For five months. Then a leading family decided to plant a new church. Surprisingly, the announcement started an avalanche of resignations.

Mark investigated to see if he had unwittingly caused the disturbance. But it seemed to go much deeper.

Many people explained, “We just can’t stand to see people leave the church again.” We suddenly learned that the church had been less than honest about their history. Now we learned about screaming matches in church services as the church had split twice in three years. We learned that Mark’s secretary had regularly criticized him through “prayer requests” at Bible studies. And now, half of the small leadership team was resigning a week after voluntarily vowing their undying commitment to the church! With each resignation, we were losing whole families.

Those leaving did so quietly, with only a slightly dramatic, tearful last Sunday, in which they expressed love for the church and Mark. When the service was over, we were left with 40 demoralized, shocked people, a group that gradually tapered to 20. Mark and I prayed and worked frantically, trying to help the church regain its equilibrium.

What do you do when you’re blindsided by life? Maybe you’ve been in a church situation like ours — or have faced other church challenges. Or maybe you’re enduring a personal crisis.

When trouble strikes, it’s easy to focus on our problems, rather than on God.

When our church blew apart, Mark and I poured every ounce of our energy into equipping and encouraging for four months. Meanwhile, our weary congregation debated whether to keep the church going despite low resources, or to merge with a more stable church. My mind continually reviewed different potential outcomes for the church, and for our family, until my heart ached and I was tired of even thinking.

During that time, I encountered 2 Chronicles 20:12, “We do not know what to do, but our eyes are on you.” As turmoil raged in my soul and uncertainty surrounded us, this became my relentless prayer of hope. I found peace in realizing that I don’t have to have the answers. When I don’t know what path lies ahead, God knows — and God is all-sufficient.

To reply to Jeanette, write Newsletter@LeadershipJournal.net.