Pastors

Confession of an Evangelistically Impaired Pastor

Leadership Books May 19, 2004

Conversion experiences have never excited me—at least as I felt they should have.
—Jim Abrahamson

I am a pastor with a terrible confession to make: I do not get excited about “soul-winning.”

I can’t help it. I feel guilty about it. I have tried to repent of it. I will go to therapy over it. But in the end I must honestly confess that altar calls and “Just as I Am” leave me cool if not cold.

Don’t get me wrong: I have a passion for Christ, the gospel, and people. I believe that faith in Christ is essential to eternal life. But bringing people to pray to receive Christ is not what lights my ministry fire.

I can recall my student days at a leading Midwestern university where, as part of a campus parachurch group, I “led fellow students to pray to receive Jesus as their Savior.” What could be more exciting, right?

Why did I not share the joy my staff worker did over one more lost sheep coming into the family of God? What was wrong with me? I loved God. I was serious about following Christ. I made sacrifices and took risks living out my faith. I even went to seminary and entered the pastoral ministry.

But to this day I am not an impassioned soul-winner. To be sure, people have come to faith as a result of my ministry, but conversion experiences have never excited me—at least as I felt they should have.

It has taken nearly twenty years for me to come to terms with my condition. Here are my reflections for those who may share my lot and for others who may not be sympathetic but need to understand that I am not a lost sheep.

Killing the sacred cow

The early days of my spiritual life were lived under the motto, “You are either an evangelist or you need one.” I had to conform to this motto.

My discomfort with this sacred cow, I’m sure, has something to do with my spiritual history: My conversion was not dramatic. My awakening to growth and maturation was far more exciting. Even today, I love to see others grow. I get excited about seeing the church in my community become the church envisioned by the apostle Paul—a mature bride. I am motivated by seeing people come to maturity in Christ.

Intellectually, I know that not every believer will have the gift for soul-winning, that one person plants, another waters, and God brings the increase. So I try not to be intimidated by my mild evangelistic passion. The New Testament affirms that new birth is an important step but only the beginning of a bigger process. Jesus commissioned his followers to make disciples but did not restrict their work to baptizing; it also included “teaching them all things.”

The evangelist and I are not serving in different armies; we are simply occupying different battle stations.

Although evangelism is not my passion, cross-cultural missions and evangelistic outreach have become an important part of our church life. Why? We have cultivated factors that draw nonbelievers to Christ in a congregation that is not focused on evangelism.

Open inquiry into truth. Nonbelievers are drawn to Christ when the church provides an atmosphere where it is safe for people to have questions answered and answers questioned. For nonbelievers to stick around long enough to see Jesus in us and hear the good news, they must feel welcome. Our worship services are prepared for believers, but we try not to offend unnecessarily the non-Christians who are present. For example, we approach sensitive subjects such as social justice, homosexuality, gender roles, and sexual ethics with respect for how non-Christians feel and why they feel the way they do.

We then introduce the light of God’s kingdom in the context of a whole new way of thinking. As a result of this ‘safe setting,’ we attract and keep a number of those who wouldn’t ordinarily come or stay.

Our board of elders is made up of a number of people who started attending our services as cynical skeptics. The openness and safety they felt in our meetings was an important factor in their changed lives.

“I don’t feel preached at here,” said one skeptical husband. “I have been preached at enough in my early contact with the church, and now I want to learn what the faith is about.” This guy, who refused Communion just two years ago, has professed faith in Christ.

Open recognition of struggle. Nonbelievers are drawn to Christ when believers speak humbly and honestly about their spiritual process. Whenever I hear someone suggest that loneliness, depression, abuse, and anger will be cured by simply praying to receive Christ, I want to stand up and shout, “Baloney! It’s not that simple for many of us.”

It is important that the leadership of the congregation be painfully honest if they hope to gain a hearing with people in modern culture. We must acknowledge we have many unanswered questions in our search for truth and light in Christ. We tell people we want a chance to answer their questions and give them a chance to question our answers without feeling ignorant or rejected.

As I was writing this, a member of our congregation walked into my office seeking help for her elderly mother who had a stroke while in a church meeting. It seems this mother expected believers to be immune from injustices such as strokes. Her expectations are all too common and seldom challenged.

I’m careful never to give the false message that Christians don’t have problems; I explain that along with the trials of life they have forgiveness, a powerful Comforter, a living hope, and a family that loves them.

Open confession of faith. Nonbelievers are drawn to Christ when they are forced to reflect on the state of their relationship with God. In our meetings, we draw clear lines between those who are in Christ and those who are not. This indirectly challenges seekers and believers alike to examine themselves to see if indeed they are of the faith.

When we take up the offering, we make it clear that this is for worshipers of Christ. “If you are present and not committed to Christ, we are not asking you to give but rather to consider the gift of life offered in Jesus.”

When we celebrate the Lord’s Table, we make it clear that this is reserved for believers only. “We don’t want to embarrass you, but we ask that you receive Christ by faith before you receive the bread and cup that he offers his followers.”

Water baptism is another place where the distinction between believer and nonbeliever can be emphasized.

New members go through an orientation class and then meet with two elders for an interview. One purpose of the interview is to hear about the prospective member’s relationship with Christ. In some cases it provides an opportunity to present the gospel and even lead the person to a faith commitment.

Frequently in the message of the morning I will talk about the unique blessings of forgiveness, the Holy Spirit, and the Christian family that belong to believers. I explain, “These words are for those who have a living faith in Christ. If you are outside the faith, this is a chance for you to get an idea of what life is like on the inside. We expect that you will be drawn to Christ as we have been.”

Open joy in worship. Several people have told us that they first came to our church because a friend brought them but that they came back again because they were impressed with the sincerity of our people in worship. Worship plays an important role in communicating both the objective and subjective aspects of the faith. When done in spirit and in truth, it is an evangelistic tool. People united in praising God from different ethnic, economic, educational, and class backgrounds is a powerful apologetic for the faith. When natural barriers are broken down by the Spirit of God, people in the world want to know why.

Open expression of compassion. Nonbelievers are drawn to Christ when God’s grace is sensed.

A professor at the University of North Carolina started coming to our worship services because two students from our church visited his aging mother every Sunday afternoon. This elderly woman was losing her sight, so they read her mail to her and wrote the letters she dictated in response. For a period of more than two years, they read the Bible to her and befriended her. Her greatest disappointment in being transferred to a nursing home in a different city was that she would never be able to attend the church where her two young friends were members. She never was able to attend, but her son was so impressed with the compassion of these two young girls that he visited the church, was renewed to the faith that he had thrown away, and became an outspoken witness for Christ in the university community.

One of the greatest compliments I have received in my twenty-three years of ministry was by a young convert who spoke of his pastor as a person who “was at peace with himself and God’s people.” That is a victory of God’s grace.

Evangelism can be alive and well even when the passion for soul-winning is not. The best evangelistic tool is a healthy church.

Copyright © 1996 by Christianity Today/Leadership

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