Just as people with the gifts of mercy, music, or leadership need cultivation and sometimes a challenge, so do those with the gift of giving.
—Wayne Pohl
In the early stages of a building-fund drive, I asked my secretary to schedule a lunch appointment for me with a church member who had given generously in the past. Three weeks later when we sat together at a local restaurant, I noticed he held in his hand a bundle of envelopes.
He fanned them out on the table and said, “I know why you asked me out to lunch. I hope it’s important because lots of requests are coming across my desk.” Pointing to the envelopes he said, “These are the appeals I’ve received since your secretary called.”
Competition for the donations of deep-pocket donors is at an all-time high. Ours is a needy world, and thankfully more and more parachurch groups and charities are trying to do something about it. And they have sophisticated fund-raising tools at their disposal: direct mail, telemarketing, telethons and television ads, magazine advertising, radio appeals, candy sales. Unfortunately many Christians, awash in appeals, are on the defensive, especially deep-pocket donors.
How is a pastor supposed to feel about joining the long line at their door? When we get inside, how can we appeal for donations in a way that is both honorable and effective? For me, it begins with perspective.
Deep-Pocket Donors Are a Spiritual Gift
When I look at someone whom God has blessed financially, I don’t see a dollar sign, a blank check, a venture capitalist, a bankroll, a cash pipeline. I see the spiritual gift of giving, as mentioned in Romans 12.
I have noticed that these individuals themselves usually see their wealth in the same light. Frequently I hear statements like this: “I am making more money than I ever thought I would make, more money than I think I’m worth to my company. Because God has so richly blessed me, I have to use this money in a way that will benefit other people and God’s kingdom.”
When I approach someone about giving, I don’t see myself as a salesman, a fund raiser, or a beggar. I am the church’s leader, charged with the responsibility of training every member to use his or her spiritual gift so that the body might be built up into the image of Christ. As a result of that biblical perspective, I approach deep-pocket givers in the belief that I have the right to do so. So I do it with authority and confidence.
I treat people with the gift of giving just as I treat anyone else. My responsibility is to nurture gifts in the church. Just as people with the gifts of mercy, music, or leadership need cultivation, oversight, and sometimes a challenge, so do those with the gift of giving. Just as I would not hesitate to ask a woman with a strong voice to sing in the church or a carpenter to do repairs, so I don’t hesitate to approach people whom God has blessed financially and ask them to support the work of the church.
Nurturing the Gift of Giving
Spiritual gifts aren’t used automatically or immediately with expertise. I have found that what I do or don’t do dramatically affects how faithfully the people in my church use theirs. This is especially true for those who have the gift of giving.
• Teach members what your church expects. One blizzardy night, I found myself in a restaurant crowded with fellow Kiwanians. I couldn’t believe I had come out in this blizzard: This is insane. The authorities are warning everyone to stay off the roads. People don’t go out on a night like this.
Later that night as I drove home through the blowing snow, I came to a stop sign, and it suddenly hit me: Kiwanis expects more of their members than the church of Jesus Christ does! That night, fifteen years ago, I resolved that would not be true in the church I pastor.
We make that clear when we interview and teach new members. If anyone attends our church and expects to do nothing, they’re in the wrong place. We teach that giving of ourselves is both an opportunity and a responsibility. We expect members to use their spiritual gifts, and we will help them discover what their gifts are. When we learn how their spiritual gifts can be used, we will ask them to be involved. Because we tell people this up-front, it’s not a surprise when we come requesting their involvement.
• Understand deep-pocket donors’ pressures. Earlier in my ministry, at a time when our denomination was making a special appeal for funds, I received a call from someone on the synodical level who asked me to supply the names of “financially blessed people” in my congregation whom the denomination could contact. The cause was worthy, and I complied.
Later I received a phone call from one of the referrals: “Pastor, I have made clear to you my financial situation, and I have done that willingly. But if you’re going to broadcast that around God’s whole world, then I will never make such private information known to you again.” He viewed my referral as a breach of trust and resented it deeply.
Wealthy people often (and rightly) feel used, as though everyone is after their money. If they think their church is just another place where they will be beat on for their bucks, they won’t stay there long.
So asking for donations too often is a mistake. I would not ask someone in our church for an extraordinary gift more than once every five years. I also meet with them for lunch or breakfast when I am not asking for money, showing them I value our relationship, not just their ability to help the church financially.
• Remember they will give their money elsewhere. Though deep-pocket donors shouldn’t be overasked, neither should they be underasked. When I presented a request for a special church project to one member, he replied, “I wish you had talked to me ten days ago. My wife and I just committed $50,000 to the Detroit zoo!” My thoughts at that moment would not have pleased animal-rights proponents.
Christians with the gift of giving will be naturally inclined to help others. Some charitable group will benefit from their generosity, so it might as well be the church. But if they don’t know about the needs and giving opportunities in our church, they won’t be inclined to donate to it. Consequently, once a member is established in our congregation, I plant a seed in his or her mind, either by an outright request for a current need or by half-kidding, “When you feel the need to give, we always have an important place to use resources.”
• Match the church’s need to their interest. Several years ago we discussed in our board meeting the idea of purchasing a van to bus people to church, especially elderly people from nursing homes. The van would cost $18,000.
After the meeting, one of the board members came into my office and enthusiastically said, “That Dial-A-Ride ministry is a wonderful idea.” One of his elderly relatives, he explained, had been a shut-in for years, unable to attend church.
Two days later, when I came to my office, I found a check on my desk for $9,000 for the van.
I assume Christians believe in the value of our cause and thus don’t need me to convince them about the importance of the church, but I do need to help Christians find specific projects that interest them. Generous Christians get excited about giving to different needs. One donor gets excited about foreign missions, another about building churches, another about Bible schools, another about food for the hungry.
My job is to make a full range of giving opportunities available that appeals to various interests. If someone with the gift of giving hasn’t yet given, I tell myself that the problem isn’t as much theirs as mine: I probably haven’t nurtured them enough or presented the need that matches their interest. If I don’t touch needs, I don’t touch hearts.
• Be convinced of the necessity of the project. Deep-pocket givers invariably ask me how important is the project for which I am appealing. A financially successful individual in our congregation, who made a large amount of money in the automotive industry and then started his own business has said to me on numerous occasions, “I am here to help, but I am not here to bail anybody out. I want to do things that nobody else would be able to do. But I have to be convinced that this project is something God wants me to contribute to.”
That sentiment is common among deep-pocket donors. So I don’t approach them with a steep request unless I am unequivocally convinced (a) that the project is necessary, and (b) that the project is necessary now. After all, this individual is probably already tithing and has already pledged for the budget, which supposedly included everything important for the church that year. Any extraordinary requests must have an urgency that prevents us from waiting until next year’s budget.
• Forewarn deep-pocket givers. No one likes to be blindsided. I don’t want deep-pocket donors wondering about ulterior motives, guessing every time I call whether I will be asking for money. I prevent that by being upfront about my intentions. When my secretary calls for an appointment, she informs them that I want to present them with a proposal.
A forewarning helps deep-pocket givers by affording them time to consider any objections and then discuss them with me.
When I presented an appeal to one man, he said, “I have done a lot for the church over the years. I think it’s time for some of the younger guys to do their part. For the good of the program, I want to hold back.”
I was able to convince him that we needed him as a model for the younger guys! By forewarning him, though, I gave him time to process his feelings, and then I could address them. That prevented later misgivings.
• Respond gracefully if they say no. I don’t strong-arm the reluctant. If someone says no to my request, I don’t want to leave them with a bad taste in his or her mouth. I want to nurture people as long-term givers. A short-term, hard-sell approach, worrying only about the church’s current need, will only undermine future giving.
A businessman in our church who is worth millions responded to one of my appeals by explaining, “Right now I’m not sure week to week whether we’re even going to make payroll. I’ve never been this tight with the dollar in my life.” I don’t argue with valid objections. Many people wealthy on paper have investments that cannot be easily liquidated, such as real estate. Though worth millions, they can’t come up with $5,000.
I receive their refusals gracefully and don’t labor the point, aware that they may feel guilty or embarrassed. Typically I will respond, “I respect your honesty and know that you do what you can for our church. I will pray and trust that the Lord will improve your situation, so don’t be surprised when eventually I ask you again. God is doing something special in our church. If God blesses you in the future, and you want to help, don’t wait for me to call.”
When do I stop coming back? Only when I feel a person is trying to get rid of me. If that’s the case, then I’m not helping them.
After They Give
Our nurturing and caring for donors after they give is just as important as motivating them to give in the first place. Giving a large gift raises a person’s interest in, commitment to, and feelings for the church. Many can be easily offended if they feel the church does not respond or follow through properly.
On the other hand, if the entire experience is positive and they truly experience what the Scripture promises—that it is more blessed to give than to receive—then they will look forward to giving again. I believe that deep-pocket donors will continue to enjoy giving if we do three things well.
• Recognize the gift. A man in our church owns a successful furniture company. For several years his wife Mary Lee worked as bookkeeper in our church office. Bookkeeping having become a major job due to the size of our congregation, Mary Lee often said, “I wish we could get computers at church like the ones we have in business.”
We began researching various computer systems for our situation, which were just beginning to come on the market, and they were extremely expensive, about $30,000.
Sometime later Mary Lee learned she had cancer. Eventually she died. Her husband wanted to buy something for the church in her memory, so I told him what she had often said about the computer system. He welcomed the idea immediately.
Months later, on the first day our new system was up and running, I printed out some of our work and mailed it to him with a note: “We didn’t realize how much we would appreciate your gift in Mary Lee’s name until today. Now we know. As you can see, this is really going to help our ministry. Most important of all. God knows what you did.”
Since then he annually comes into our office and asks us what would be needed to upgrade the system; then he tells us to buy whatever it takes to do that and send him the bill. Over the years he probably has invested over $100,000 in our computers.
When people use their spiritual gifts in a special way in the church, I mail them thank-you notes. It’s no different when people give special monetary gifts to the church. In the note I remind givers of what good will result from their gifts, affirm their ultimate motives for giving—to serve Christ and his kingdom—and remind them of the church’s gratitude.
I don’t, however, recognize such gifts from the pulpit, and we’re not enthusiastic about nailing plaques to everything in the church. In my experience, generally the larger the gift, the less the donor wants it known. Most often the one condition set by deep-pocket donors is that no one knows about their contribution but me. They don’t give to impress others, and sometimes they are concerned about attracting a line of people at their door, hat in hand. For a building program, we list donors in a book.
• Inform them of the status of a purchase. We recently bought a new church sign toward which one couple, Mike and Clara, contributed significantly. We chose to work with a company based in the South, which had to fly a representative into Detroit to confer with us, so the job took a lot longer than anticipated. Throughout the long process, we updated Mike and Clara, who had no trouble understanding the delays. When the sign finally stood in place, although glitches and frustrations had to be overcome in the process, everyone was happy.
When people invest heavily in a project, they “own” it. It’s important to them. And when they own it, they wonder how it’s progressing, imagine how it will look, perhaps worry that everything will be done right. These are natural feelings that we are wise to respect.
If significant problems with a project arise, I communicate that to the donor immediately and forthrightly. Deep-pocket givers usually work with movers and shakers, doers and shooters, people who see right through a snow job. Honest communication is extremely important to them. They will understand difficulties; they will not understand being ignored or misled.
• Properly allocate the gift. With our church in the middle of a building program, we were feeling intense cash-flow pressure. People were shifting their giving to the building, so the general fund was down. Meanwhile the local economy was in deep doldrums, leaving lots of people unemployed. One Sunday I mentioned in my sermon the needs of many in our congregation.
The next Sunday one man approached me after the service and said, “My wife and I have been praying about what you said last week. I have a check here for $15,000. I want the church to divide it among members with needs.”
At that moment my feelings were mixed. Part of me was rejoicing that we could help those who were hurting. Another part of me, feeling the church’s financial pressure, was thinking, Why didn’t I preach on something else last Sunday? That may not have been the right sentiment, but that’s what I felt.
Nevertheless, no matter the pressure, a pastor can’t think for a moment about reallocating designated money. Misallocating funds is not only immoral; it’s suicide. If a congregation ever learns that money has been reallocated without congregational or donor approval, trust is gone.
Control also can become an issue. A husband and wife once said to the chairman of our music department, “The church’s piano looks a bit tacky. Does the church need a new one?”
Bill, our music director, replied, “We sure do.”
“Shop around and see what is available,” the potential deep-pocket giver said.
Bill visited various piano showrooms, researching until he found what he felt would be the best piano for us. It happened to be manufactured in Japan.
When he informed the potential donors of what he wanted to buy, they said, “That’s not American made.”
Bill said, “No, but it’s the best piano for our church.”
This long-time resident of Detroit made it clear that he would not donate to the church for a foreign-made product. Bill later came into my office and asked, “What are we going to do about this?”
Normally a person designates what they want their gift to buy. In theory their control ends there. In practice, however, we want donors to be happy with their contribution.
Well-acquainted with Detroit values, I decided that though our music director wanted a different piano, the sentiments of many more people than the donor would be rubbed raw by a foreign-made purchase, so I said, “Go back through the sales materials and find the best American-made piano for our church.”
At that point nurturing a person’s gift of giving and respecting community values was more important than a particular piano. At other times we exert more leadership, but in a way that still nurtures the giver.
For example, people love to give to the music program (by now we could have forty sets of handbells). When someone offers to buy handbells or some other unneeded product, we leave the decision to them but frankly say, “You can buy handbells for the church if you want, but they won’t be used. We already have more than one set. Let me suggest another place to contribute where we have a greater need.”
Going Outside the Fold
Our church sponsors a food ministry called St. Paul Pantry, which is well-known in our community. Although it can be a drain on workers—we receive calls day and night and the community refers hundreds of people annually—we do it because we feel led of the Lord. People in the community don’t care why we run St. Paul Pantry, but they do see the benefits and often call to offer financial support.
We don’t require people to sign a doctrinal statement to contribute to our ministry. If the community benefits—for example, from an athletic program or a building that is used regularly for community-wide programs—I will not only accept donations but invite them. We inform potential donors up front about our philosophy of ministry and our spiritual purposes, show them how the community will be enhanced, and welcome their support.
We sponsor a classical concert series each year, the best in the area, for the purpose of reaching new people for Christ. The series has been so fruitful that the church would underwrite it completely, but people want to be patrons. One of our members worked in the office of three successful dentists, and she invited them to the concerts. They attended and since have contributed heavily each year. Their help and that of others frees us to use general funds for other purposes.
One of our men came into my office and said, “Pastor, some of the sanctuary walls are fading. Why don’t you get an estimate for a paint job?”
Our director of buildings and church properties took bids, and the best offer was $14,000. When I informed our potential deep-pocket donor, he wrote out a check for $14,000 and said, “Tell the contractors I’d like it done by Easter.”
The first Sunday after the painters finished the job, I saw him walk into our early service, lift his eyes to the walls and ceiling, look behind the radiator, and smile.
And that made me smile. Because when deep-pocket donors give and smile, keep giving and keep smiling, they have fulfilled their calling—and I, part of mine.
Copyright © 1992 by Christianity Today
