Pastors

The Want To

How do we foster kids’ desire to make day-to-day decisions so they’ll live the way God wants them to live?

Leadership Journal June 29, 2005

Two guys busy working. A young man passes by them. Strong words exchanged.

Lives change.

In fact, you likely know the story well. In Matthew 4, Jesus walks by Simon (Peter) and Andrew as they fish and says, “Follow me, and I will make you fishers of men.” Without hesitation, they drop their nets; clearly they desire to obey.

Notice that Jesus said, “Follow me.” He didn’t say, “Meet me one day each week.” Nor did he say, “Now that you’ve met me once, you’re all set. Get back to the fish.”

Following Jesus is a 24/7 plan—not just an agenda for Sundays. When people—adults or children—meet Jesus for the first time, they’re not supposed to just ask for forgiveness and then live the way they always have. Rather, Jesus needs to be Lord of our lives, which means submitting our wills to him and seeking his direction and guidance—from both the Holy Spirit and the Bible. The key to all of this, though, is that we must want to do these things.

After her bedtime prayer, first-grader Erin asked, “Does God really want us to say ‘sorry’ for everything we do wrong?”

“Yes, he does,” her dad said. “God sees everything we do, and is just waiting for us to tell him we’re sorry.”

“If we don’t remember something; will he be mad if we forget something?” she asked.

“He knows we probably can’t remember everything, but for what we do remember, God really wants us to tell him. Then he can help us not do that stuff anymore.” Long pause as Erin’s mind races.

“Daddy, I think I want to say another prayer.”

So how do we help develop the “want to” of kids? Specifically, how do we foster kids’ desire to make day-to-day decisions so they’ll live the way God wants them to live? In children’s ministry, we put plenty of energy into teaching the Bible so that our kids learn about good decisions. But unless they also desire to make those wise choices, the learning can be in vain. Let’s look at this issue in terms of our kids—and in terms of how we can help them.

Jesus’ parable of the sower (Matthew 13) indicates that Scripture will take root in a person’s will only if he or she makes the decision to accept Christ. This is critical, because when kids aren’t yet Christians, we can only hope to temporarily modify their behavior.

Jimmy heard the salvation message in second and third grades, and in fourth grade he prayed to receive Christ. “Today it made more sense to me,” he explained to his small group leader. Jimmy began to more fully grasp Bible lessons, and a few months later his mom remarked that he seemed different in many good ways. Scripture’s roots finally found good soil.

Let’s assume that we’re talking about kids who have accepted Christ. There are four foundational concepts to build upon when teaching children about why they should want Scripture to direct their lives.

“To start, call sin what it really is—going against God and potentially hurting yourself,” says Holly Delich, who taught in the fourth- and fifth-grades for Promiseland, the children’s ministry of Willow Creek Community Church. “Kids today need to hear that there are absolutes when it comes to right and wrong. And when they do, they’ll want to know more about what is right and what is truth.”

Next is the concept of rewards and consequences. Said another way, decisions really matter. “If kids get a glimpse of how even small choices today can turn into bigger issues tomorrow,” explains Holly, “they can be encouraged to want to make good decisions. While the domino effect of one lie leading to more, with deepening severity, is easily understood, so is the chain effect of honoring your father and mother. The impact of good decisions needs to be stressed as much or more than the consequences of sin, or you run the risk of just scaring kids.”

There’s a lot of competition when it comes to influencing how kids want to make decisions—the entertainment industry, advertisers, and media all specifically target children. “So reveal to kids how the world is constantly trying to influence their choices and desires,” counsels Holly. “We have an entire unit in our curriculum called ‘Got Wisdom?’ that deals directly with where you get the wisdom to make decisions—the culture or the Bible.”

Fourth, children need encouragement that they can make good, biblically based decisions. “For kids to truly want the truth of the Bible to guide their lives, they must see it as the obvious place to go,” says Holly. “How you position the Bible will make all the difference in the world as to whether kids embrace or ignore Scripture.”

You and I know that living by God’s word can change young lives. But first, they must want to. So let’s examine how we teach the Bible.

Want To: Teach the Bible?

Bible teaching should be relevant and application-oriented so that we equip kids to apply Scripture to their lives. This happens best when you know all you can about the real world in which kids live. For example, tell the story of the rich young ruler (Matthew 19: 16-22), but use a wealthy young music star (see example—Got Relevancy). Children don’t see a lot of rich young rulers these days, but stars’ images abound. Relevant teaching becomes application-oriented when you give kids practical examples of how Scripture can guide them through specific circumstances they might face.

Solid education principles will also help maximize kids’ learning. For instance, there is an age-varying limit to the number of key concepts a child can learn in any one sitting—as well as a limit to how long that sitting can last. (We can’t expect second graders to sit through 30 minutes of teaching, even if it’s the rich young music star.) Of course, age-appropriate language is a must.

Creativity in teaching helps kids remember to apply biblical truth to their lives. A lesson that uses the arts—drama or media, perhaps—is more likely to stick with a child then one that uses the teacher talk/kids listen approach because you reach across a variety of learning styles. Evaluate the creativity in your teaching methods and curriculum from the perspective of a child. Be open and ask kids what they think; their opinion of creativity, not yours, is the one that counts.

A safe place for dialogue will ensure that spiritual roots stay healthy and help kids apply learning to everyday life. Consider offering formal small groups for kids, where each week the same adult leader and group of kids talk about the realities and reservations of following Jesus.

Finally, be a role model so kids can see someone whose will is to live a life guided by Scripture. Share appropriate, specific situations you have faced—and explain the challenges of responding as a Christ follower. When kids see an adult leader making real-life decisions based on the Bible, they’ll have a picture of how they can do the same. Children have difficulty wanting to do something they can’t see. But they can see you.

When the children in your charge see how intentional you are about following Jesus, they will better understand your efforts to instill the same “want to” in them. As a result, they will be much closer to understanding what Christ wants us to do when he says, “Follow me.”

Copyright © 2005 Promiseland.

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