Pastors

When Should You Ask People to Leave Your Church?

Dealing with attenders who aren’t getting involved.

Leadership Journal April 20, 2010

Donald Miller writes here about a pastor who asked people to leave his church. This pastor stood up in front of his congregation, asked how many people were involved, invited those who weren’t to plug in, and then asked those who hadn’t found a home group or ministry that fit them to go and try another church. The next week, there was a slight drop in attendance.

Miller says he appreciates this unconventional move. After all, the pastor wasn’t telling people to leave the church universal. He just wanted people there to be onboard with this particular church’s mission, and as Miller says, the pastor recognized that “in your organization, there may be some people who simply aren’t a fit.”

As Miller does, I like this pastor’s unwillingness to tolerate passive involvement. But I wonder about the approach.

I do think it’s important to broadcast your expectations of church members to them, in corporate settings and everywhere. But I think your enforcement of those expectationsโ€“church discipline, in other wordsโ€“needs to happen in a more gradual, relational way.

So if there are people coming on Sunday who aren’t getting involved (a rarity, of course), the leaders need to have a way of knowing that. Then eventually, someone needs to seek these people out one-on-one, find out what’s going on, and help them take those first steps toward getting involved. If it’s a case where a believer needs to repent of something, then you start to play a little tougher.

But do you ever ask someone to leave for “fit” reasons? I don’t think so. They’ll make that decision themselves, for better or worse. I think fit is overrated anywayโ€“sometimes church is supposed to be awkward and uncomfortable. Eugene Peterson will get my back on that.

Do you ever ask someone to leave for sin reasons? Potentially, eventually, yes.

What do you think?

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