John Tolson serves as a spiritual life coach for some of the nation's leading executives, celebrities, and athletes. John is the author of The Four Priorities and Take a Knee, a motivational book based on the locker room messages he gave to the Dallas Cowboys.
Today we talk with John about servant-leadership, taking a knee, and how to pray for your team.
1) People have a pretty jaded view of professional athletes these days, but you spend time up close and personal with them. What, in your mind, is different between the public perception of superstar athletes and what you see in private?
The public view, I think, is basically that superstar athletes are spoiled, rich, out of control, it's all about them, they can be crude and rude.
Privately, there are a few who are polite and respectful, they may or may not be an athlete of faith—some are but I really believe that probably most aren't. They've got things constantly pulling at them—people who want things from them, to give their endorsement to a product, to invest in a new business. They've got women who are constantly trying to hook up with them. And if you think about it, they are living their life in a fishbowl. So there are unique things about the professional athlete in private that the general public doesn't understand the full dynamics of.
What these athletes are missing, in my opinion, is they need help growing up. So many of these athletes come into the sports world when they are very young, they make a lot of money very quickly, they've got instant fame, and all the other things that are coming at them, pulling at them. They need someone to walk with them—someone to kick them in the rear when they need a kick, and to encourage them when they need to be encouraged. But especially to help them, if they have a proclivity toward the faith; someone to come alongside and help them grow deeper in their faith—not only to know the important fundamentals of the faith and the Scriptures and so forth, but to live it out in their daily life.
2) We've seen, in the last few years, the rising popularity of Christian athletes such as Tim Tebow, Tony Dungy, Ben Zobrist, and a few others. Some are criticized for making their faith too public and others for making it too private. How do you counsel Christian athletes?
Learning to be a servant leader in the most basic things is critical for the Christian athlete because as their teammates who aren't Christians watch them it can have a powerful impact.
There's a balance that's necessary, and wisdom is needed in knowing how to share your faith and show it. If a non-Christian sees a guy pointing to the sky after he scores a touchdown, a lot of times he has no idea what in the world that means. Again, I think it takes a great deal of wisdom to know how to portray your faith especially in that arena. Actually I think that there are more productive ways that a Christian athlete can make a difference for Christ. Number 1: Make sure that you are living your faith consistently in your private life as well as your public life. Number 2: Be a servant, even in the locker room. I've seen guys in the locker rooms of various teams and they'll throw stuff all over, they don't pick up after themselves but leave it to the paid personnel, etc.
Learning to be a servant leader in the most basic things is critical for the Christian athlete because as their teammates who aren't Christians watch them it can have a powerful impact. How they talk needs to be consistent with their faith; sometimes the language they use on the field and in the locker room is different than what they use in the public arena. Reaching out to teammates who are hurting and beginning to walk with them, encourage them, and hopefully eventually lead them to Christ. And then I think being available at any given moment to be used of the Lord in someone's life.
3) You encourage football teams to "take a knee" before they leave the tunnel and go onto the field. Why?
In the Cowboy's locker room, when I was chaplain for that team, there are those who know the Lord and there are many who don't—players as well as other personnel. So in the 2-minute Take-a-Knee opportunity, that was my chance to be able to give an inspirational message to get them ready for the game, but also to be able through that to point them to Christ, and the entire team was able to have that exposure to the Lord. Not all of the players on an NFL team come to the weekly chapel or Bible study—that's optional. But when we did take a knee in the locker room we had everyone. So this way you're able to sow the seed to everyone on the team. Sometimes you think that the guys who don't know the Lord aren't getting it, but I can give you many illustrations of players who would call me later and ask me about something that I said and that it had really made a difference in their life. It stuck.
4) Some might say "God is not on either side, why bother to pray?" How would you answer that?
"Did you pray to win?" And I said, "No. God could care less who wins."
Well, you don't pray that you'll win. I remember one time years ago when I worked with the Houston Rockets and there was a reporter outside the room where we were meeting and when I came out he asked, "Did you pray to win?" And I said, "No. God could care less who wins. But we do pray for safety, we pray to play our best, we pray that we'll play with 'class'—and not show off and do a lot of the stuff that many players unfortunately do."
5) How would you encourage Christians to treat superstar athletes, especially Christians, as they seek to apply their gifts to their trade for the glory of God?
One big thing you can do if you're a fan is pray for them. Pray that they will stay close to Christ, that they will stay in the Scripture, and that they'll have a buddy walking with them that will hold their feet to the fire in their faith. I would also say that you can point kids and other people to some of these athletes and say, "These are athletes you need to look to who love Jesus. They're not perfect, but they are progressing." Pray that God will use athletes to impact the lives of other people through their faith. They have an incredible platform, and that platform needs to be used for the Lord very, very wisely.
A great, great old movie that I would recommend everyone go back and see is,Chariots of Fire—about the great Olympic athlete, Eric Liddell, who boldly and consistently lived his faith and had a profound impact over the years.
Daniel Darling is vice-president of communications for the Ethics and Religious Liberty Commission. He is the author of several books, including his latest, Activist Faith.
