Page 2 of 2Soon, Allan began asking some serious questions. He was concerned about his faith, and was wondering whether he was really a Christian, since his memories of his salvation experience at age 10 were dim.
I began to ask him specific questions about what he understood about the gospel. Gradually I turned the conversation to questions about his current spiritual life, his prayer life and ministries.
We were able to talk through his dilemma until he could see that his problem might not be whether he was saved back when he was 10, but how he is living the Christian life today.
We Build Existing Relationships Carefully
There is something inherently impersonal about e-mail and IM, even for those who use them regularly and comfortably. The best online relationships grow out of personal, face-to-face relationships and are strengthened by frequent and regular off-line interaction.
I learned this lesson the hard way. While engaged in an IM conversation with a young couple (they were taking turns elbowing one another away from the keyboard), I said some pointed things about their marriage relationship and about some of the choices they had been making as parents.
Unfortunately, they took everything I said with a harsher tone than I intended, and the IM quickly came to a dead halt. Several weeks passed before I could re-establish their trust in me as someone who loved them and accepted them.
When schedules get hectic around our house, and my wife misses a day or two on the computer, the young marrieds who look to her as a "spiritual mother" become restless. The phone rings more. The answering machine fills with plaintive cries: "Call me! I need to talk!"
The most effective online conversations have been with people we see frequently in real life. The e-mail and instant messages expand upon our personal ministries, rather than replacing them.
T. R. Robertson is a lay minister with Christian Campus House in Columbia, Missouri.
Leadership Journal, Fall 2004, Vol. XXV, No. 4, Page 77
Copyright © 2004 by the author or Christianity Today/Leadership Journal.
