Family Life

The Continental Congress on the Family will be held in St. Louis, Missouri, October 13–17. The following quotations are from material prepared for that event.

Edith Schaeffer,author.

A family is an interaction of personalities, minds, and emotions. It is a living mobile. It is a museum of memories; it is form and freedom; it is a shelter; it is an economic unit.… Because the human family is a tiny picture of the whole Family of God, putting the Lord first will actually mean putting the family before all else at times.

Lloyd Ogilvie,pastor, First Presbyterian Church, Hollywood, California.

Oneness in marriage is the result of experiencing the relational implications of the Gospel. It begins with grace. Because of the unmerited love of God, we are made right with him through the cross. This is the focal experience of our salvation. Acceptance of ourselves as loved enables us to love ourselves as loved by God. This self-acceptance frees a person to be delighted in himself, excited by his own uniqueness and potential. Emotional healing of the syndrome of self-negation and disease is made possible by this experience of grace in the depths of personality. This alone can reverse the “not okayness” which is communicated through our growing-up years. Many “Christian” families have failed miserably in being a gracious womb of healthy self-appreciation. Too few children of Christian homes can say, “I’m glad I’m me!”

Britton Wood,minister to single adults, Park Cities Baptist Church, Dallas, Texas.

Many persons who are married feel that the most important way to help the single person is to find a suitable marital partner. They find it inconceivable that some single adults choose to be single.… Some married adults find the single adult life-style threatening to the married adult life-style.… The Church can provide one of the few opportunities for single adults to meet in a non-threatening environment.

Denny Rydberg,editor, “The Wittenburg Door,” San Diego, California.

I wish Paul had added the words “There is neither youth nor adult” [to Galatians 3:28].… We have a tendency in the Church to discriminate on the basis of age. Senior citizens are shuffled off to the Golden Hours club. Youth are confined to the youth group.… Don’t age-group all Sunday-school classes.… Involve adults and youth in retreats and mission projects.… Encourage and train young people to teach younger children in the Sunday school.… God ministered to and used the services of young people. Let us follow the example of our Master. Equality, not discrimination. Incorporation, not alienation.

Larry Christenson,author and pastor, Trinity Church, San Pedro, California.

A husband needs to be sensitive to his wife’s hurts.… The husband demonstrates his love in that he sacrifices for [his wife].… He helps her to become holy.… He is concerned that she become a fully developed person.

Gladys Hunt,author.

When women have won all their rights and honor and equal opportunity, we will still be faced with our emptiness if we have not worked out our human relationships.… Christian wives must heed a new call to an old truth, a call to maintain, to insist upon, and to establish quality relationships in our lonely, alienated world.

Letha Scanzoni,author.

Some roles are achieved, and others ascribed. Gender roles are of the ascribed type. Increasingly, behavioral scientists are showing that the sexes have far more in common than they have differences. Thus, ascribed roles on the basis of gender seem totally out of place today.… According to the Scriptures, the Holy Spirit apportions gifts “to each individually as He wills.” Nothing is said about limitations according to gender, and there is no room for ascribed roles here. The whole idea of labeling characteristics “masculine” or “feminine” is patently unscriptural.

John Scanzoni,professor of sociology, Indiana University, Bloomington.

The application of individual affirmation to women has been and is now the major force changing the family.… Affirmation means that the Church gladly extends this right to women in all areas, including ordination. The issue that the Christian man must face in terms of a Christian woman is not, “How much authority do I have over you?” Instead it is, “What can we do for each other? What can I do for you?” The point is that within the family that is emerging, among a steadily increasing minority the watchwords are freedom for the exercise of gifts and flexibility to allow for changes over time. Some women will always prefer traditional patterns of marriage, and they must be allowed this freedom. Once we catch sight of how exciting and challenging and interesting it would be if women were affirmed, we would begin to do it with considerable enthusiasm.

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