Alfred Hitchcock made movies about obsession, madness, and voyeurism. Martin Scorsese is drawn to violence, to the shedding of human blood and all that it entails. The Coens are drawn to the darkly comedic foibles of human nature, to that innate foolishness and depravity that lends itself equally well to a murder story or a madcap quest for a stolen rug. And Peter Hedges? His muse is the family. And not dysfunctional family, either—just family, the universal need for acceptance and compassion that we can only get from those we call kin.

Which is not to say that he hasn't portrayed his fair share of dysfunction; to be sure, the ties of family in his novel What's Eating Gilbert Grape?, his screenplay for About a Boy, and his directorial debut, Pieces of April, are all, at times, a bit shaky, with just the right amount of heartache for really moving comedy. But with Dan in Real Life, Hedges does something so unusual, its radicalism is sure to provoke enthusiasm and cynicism in equal measure: He portrays a family not as broken or barely keeping it together, but as positively overflowing with affection, with love for one another, with genuine compassion and grace. It's a move that bears some similarity to other recent films—the preternaturally blessed family bonds of The Incredibles, maybe—but it's a far cry from the strained relations between the members of April's Burns family, to say nothing of, say, a Wes Anderson film.

Steve Carell as advice columnist Dan Burns

Steve Carell as advice columnist Dan Burns

Steve Carell stars in this small treasure of a movie, a film so filled with heart and imagination that it's sure to be cherished by many. Carell—also a Burns, and the Dan of the movie's title—is a widower, raising three girls and providing for them with his salary as a newspaper advice columnist. But of course, writing about living wisely is much easier than actually doing it, and, after awkwardly breaking up a blossoming romance between one of his daughters and a classmate, then refusing to give his oldest a chance to get behind the wheel for practice driving the family car, Dan ends up at his clan's New England cabin and announces to his parents (Dianne Wiest and John Mahoney) that his own family hates him.

Not wanting to sour the bustling family weekend—Dan's siblings, with spouses and kids in tow, are all present as well—he humbly drives into town to pick up a few supplies, promptly falling flat on his face in love with Marie (the luminous Juliette Binoche). He flirts with her, talks to her for what seems like hours, scores her phone number, and heads home. Dan brags about his new romantic prospects to his family, and is crestfallen when his brother Mitch (stand-up star Dane Cook) introduces him to his new girl—who is, of course, the very same woman Dan flirted with in the bookstore.

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Dan falls for the luminescent Marie (Juliette Binoche)

Dan falls for the luminescent Marie (Juliette Binoche)

A family weekend, a shared secret, and a woman torn between two brothers—it's the stuff of totally lame Lifetime movies, but Hedges' film is filled with minor triumphs and little miracles, not the least of which is the way he breathes new life into the tried-and-true rom-com formula by shifting the focus from the couple to the family dynamic. It's not just a movie about Dan and Marie; it's just as much a movie about Dan and Mitch, Dan and his girls, Dan and his parents.

Another triumph: Two tremendously talented actors and one irritating stand-up comedian all impress with performances that expand our knowledge of just what they can do. Carell goes way beyond Michael Scott and The 40-Year-Old Virgin here, playing Dan with humility and restraint, applying a light touch but still letting us feel Dan's heartache and frustration. It's even more generous than his fine work in Little Miss Sunshine, and it deserves awards recognition. Binoche—well known for her refusal to do Hollywood movies, and for her persona in the French tabloids as a temperamental artiste—absolutely glows here, emanating humor and grace in a role that's brave for being so different from what she usually does. And Cook—an untested actor best known for his crass, broad stand-up comedy bits—gives a performance he should be proud of, bringing just the right cheerful wit and physicality to Mitch. The three leads all shine, even though they're playing against a backdrop of highly skilled, celebrated Broadway actors, all of whom are generous in playing well beneath their considerable talents.

Mitch (Dane Cook, right) and Dan both have a thing for Marie

Mitch (Dane Cook, right) and Dan both have a thing for Marie

But perhaps the film's greatest gift is the way it doggedly refuses to feel like a Big Hollywood Movie; despite its comparatively large budget and the well-known names in the cast, it's every bit as intimate as Pieces of April, feeling not like a blockbuster, but like the kind of small, simple movie that is discovered by only a few, but is forever cherished by those lucky enough to find it. Perhaps it's because there's not an iota of pretense here, not the slightest hint of hipster irony or of cynicism. It's a movie about family, made by people who know about family, who are concerned about family, who believe in family.

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Which is not to say that everyone will believe in this particular family. The camaraderie shared amongst the Burns clan will strike some as a bit too sincere, perhaps saccharine or sentimental. After all, these people seem to do everything together, and they generally do it with smiles on their faces; they compete for crossword puzzle dominance, they do morning aerobics on the front lawn, they share big, home-cooked meals. They even put on a family talent show. Some might suggest that no family really behaves like this—but, apparently, the Burns family does. The characters are based on the real-life family of screenwriter Pierce Gardner, who says that almost everything the Burns family does—save for the morning aerobics—is completely true to life.

Morning aerobics for the whole family!

Morning aerobics for the whole family!

Hedges is the go-to guy for movies about family, and this film is positive without insulting our intelligence—something we don't see very often at all. As his feelings for Marie grow—and as he is reminded of his responsibilities as a father and as a brother—Dan wrestles with some weighty ethical questions, and the film doesn't necessarily offer easy answers so much as it points to the importance of our family in keeping us grounded, in holding us accountable while still giving us forgiveness, room to grow and pursue what matters to us. It's a movie about family, about responsibility, and about choices, and—best of all, for parents of children the same age as Dan's—it's devoid of foul language and explicit sexuality, making it a film about family that can actually take your family to see—at least your older kids, anyway. It's a movie for grown-ups that you can watch with your children.

Talk About It

Discussion starters
  1. Dan wrestles with his responsibilities to his brother, to his daughters, and to himself. Do you think he achieves any kind of balance here? How should these responsibilities be divided?
  2. Do you think Dan makes the right or the wrong choice concerning Marie? Why?
  3. Why do you think Dan has such a hard time following his own advice?
  4. What does the film suggest about the role of family in our lives? About what a family should do for us, and what we should do for our family?

The Family Corner

For parents to consider

Dan in Real Life is rated PG-13 for some innuendo. It's actually a very "soft" PG-13 that might well have gotten a PG rating. There is no foul language or explicit sex, but there are a few sexual euphemisms, mostly on par with innuendo you might see on, say, The Cosby Show or Home Improvement—and these are likely to go over the heads of younger children. There is also a scene in which a female character finds herself awkwardly undressing in front of a man, but nothing explicit is seen; still, it might not be appropriate for very young children. The movie has such a positive portrayal of family that it's something parents might consider watching and discussing with their kids.

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What other Christian critics are saying:

Dan in Real Life
Our Rating
3½ Stars - Good
Average Rating
 
(4 user ratings)ADD YOURSHelp
Mpaa Rating
PG-13 (for some innuendo)
Genre
Directed By
Peter Hedges
Run Time
1 hour 38 minutes
Cast
Steve Carell, Juliette Binoche, Dane Cook
Theatre Release
October 26, 2007 by Focus Features
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