"But it's easy to build community in the women's ministry; women are so relational."

That comment from a male colleague reflects a pervasive fallacy. While women may generally be more sensitive and verbal than men, we still struggle to develop relationships that foster true community.

Recently our church planned a weekend retreat, but many women didn't sign up because, we heard later, they didn't know who their roommates would be. Some of these women had been in the church for more than ten years. I've also had women threaten to leave an event simply because their one friend didn't show up.

Why do women, who seem so good at relationships, not feel at home in community? And how can we overcome those feelings in the church?

1. "She's better than I … " A group of moms from our church were meeting for tea and conversation. As the afternoon waned, Cass began feeling more and more angry about her place in life. Raising two toddlers left her little free time. As she listened to Wendy talk ...