Jump directly to the Content


You're told to be vulnerable--to disclose yourself honestly to those around you. But like most of us you're painfully aware that honest self-disclosure can blow up in your face.

In my first year of high school I double-dated with my older sister and her boyfriend. We were at a coffee shop when Ralph commented that I looked flushed. As a matter of fact I did feel hot, and headachy as well. Ralph pointed out that during the night my face had broken out even more than my teenage acne warranted. When I admitted that the lights in the restaurant seemed a bit bright, he announced the obvious. I had measles.

This was a blow. Our family was scheduled to leave on a Florida vacation the next morning. My sister and I knew that as soon as our parents discovered my illness they would cancel the trip. So we conspired not to let them know. I took aspirin for the headache, covered my arms with long-sleeved shirts, and wore dark glasses outside. I stayed out of the sun and used generous quantities of talcum powder and Clearasil to mask the worst blemishes on my face. My folks never found out.

Although this is an extreme example, it represents my basic philosophy toward self-disclosure ...

Subscriber access only You have reached the end of this Article Preview

To continue reading, subscribe to Christianity Today magazine. Subscribers have full digital access to CT Pastors articles.

Support Our Work

Subscribe to CT for less than $4.25/month

Homepage Subscription Panel

Read These Next

Pastors Get to Set Boundaries Too
Pastors Get to Set Boundaries Too
Strategies for bringing healthy rhythms into a dysfunctional church culture.
From the Magazine
Revelation Is Good News for Today, not a Game Plan for the Future
Revelation Is Good News for Today, not a Game Plan for the Future
For a clearer picture of this mysterious book, try trading a prediction lens for a missional lens.
Editor's Pick
Pastors in Pain, Christ Can Redeem Your Suffering
Pastors in Pain, Christ Can Redeem Your Suffering
After many difficult years in ministry, I lost the strength to pastor. But Christ met me in weakness.