Talking to unchurched people about spiritual matters is sometimes uncomfortable. Nervous fidgeting, blank stares, and vague replies seem clues to veiled disinterest. Ever wish the unchurched person was as interested in spiritual life as you are?

I've discovered that in many ways they are. Almost everyone has definite spiritual ideas; most have had some sort of religious experience. Some feel close to God and are content with their spiritual beliefs; many are willing to talk about their spiritual lives.

But not if you start with dogma.

I've learned that if I lead off with doctrine, people retreat in fear and trembling. They entrench themselves for a battle. In the past my tendency has been to continue to storm their fortifications. It's not surprising I have not helped many that way.

After several such experiences, I decided I did not know much about the spiritual lives of non-churched people. I've spent my life in church; I needed to develop some open-ended questions to draw the unchurched ...