Jump directly to the Content

When My Daughter Said, 'I'm Gay'

Confessions of an evangelical pastor.

It was Saturday night on Valentine's Day weekend, and my wife and I were watching the late news. Our daughter Tess walked into the room, handed us a note, and walked away.

The note said, "I am gay. I am happy this way. And if you really love me, you won't try to change me, and you will not try to talk with me about this."

Tess was 16, a junior in high school. The dreams we had for her life changed dramatically that night. Our lives did too.

She never chose to be a pastor's kid, but she was one. And she had experienced some significant struggles. Now, with one bold stroke, she let us know that whatever choices we had made in life so far, she was making her own choices from here on out.

That night was harder for me than the nights when either of my parents died. Something truly died within me that night. And yet something new was born.

After reading the note, tears flowed. Cheryl and I looked at each other and knew we had to respond. No matter what the ...

May/June
Support Our Work

Subscribe to CT for less than $4.25/month

Homepage Subscription Panel

Read These Next

Related
From Abandoned to Adopted
From Abandoned to Adopted
An Interview with Laura-Valentine Lock
From the Magazine
The Secret Sin of ‘Mommy Juice’
The Secret Sin of ‘Mommy Juice’
Alcoholism among women is rising. Can the church help?
Editor's Pick
What Christians Miss When They Dismiss Imagination
What Christians Miss When They Dismiss Imagination
Understanding God and our world needs more than bare reason and experience.
close