How to Lead and Feed


I want to be the warm and gentle pastor who comforts and the visionary leader who challenges.
—Jack Hayford

One Saturday years ago some stunning, painful news came to me. Through a counseling conversation, I discovered that a pastor in our church had fallen into adultery. Since I trusted the person giving me this information, I knew I had to act—but what should I do exactly? I didn't want to presume his guilt; then again, if he was at fault, I had to deal with him.

The following Tuesday, that same pastor snapped at another staff member, so I decided to call him into my office to talk about that. Meanwhile, I hoped he would acknowledge his immorality in the course of the conversation.

Having known and even been involved in the training of this young man for years, I could be direct. In fact, I was pretty hard on him about his snapping remark. "We don't treat each other like that," I stressed. Then, spontaneously, I added, "But that's not the only problem here, is it?"

He looked up at me, began ...

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