{"id":12888,"date":"2008-09-05T00:00:00","date_gmt":"2008-09-05T00:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/2008\/09\/05\/bettys-secret-ingredient\/"},"modified":"2008-09-05T00:00:00","modified_gmt":"2008-09-05T00:00:00","slug":"bettys-secret-ingredient","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/content\/bettys-secret-ingredient\/","title":{"rendered":"Betty&#8217;s Secret Ingredient"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><strong>O<\/strong>n a dark and dismal day a while back,\nmy wife and I went for coffee at a place\nwe like. We each ordered a latt\u00e9 and\nchose a pastry to split. The clerk, noting the other\npastry we almost chose, put it in a separate bag and\nsaid, &#8220;Here, I think you&#8217;d really like this one too.&#8221;<\/p><p>No doubt we would, I thought, nearly objecting. Then\nI saw in his eyes that he was giving us a gift. That was just\nthe start.<\/p><p>One of this bakery&#8217;s specialties is their chicken pot-pie,\nand that sounded like perfect comfort food on such a day.\nSo as we came to the cash register, we told our clerk we\nwanted to buy one of those as well. He placed a full, delicious\nlooking pot-pie in our bag, and then stepped to\nanother part of bakery. When he returned he had a\nscrumptious, whole apple pie that he gently laid in our bag\nas well, saying, &#8220;You will love this. It goes great with the\nchicken pot pie.&#8221; It was a gift, simply and unmistakably.<\/p><p>Welcome to Bake Sale Betty&#8217;s, an unmarked bakery on\nan unattractive corner in Oakland. Over the years, their\nbuilding has been the site of many failed businesses, mostly\nthe check-cashing ilk. Betty&#8217;s is not failing. In fact, Betty&#8217;s\nrules and it has for several years.<\/p><p>Betty herself wears a shiny electric-blue synthetic wig,\nsells fried chicken sandwiches by the hundreds, serves\nunusual and delicious pastries, bakes a chicken pot-pie that\nmakes all others incidental. The long lines out the door,\nwending alongside uncovered ironing boards and stools that\nare Betty&#8217;s outside seating, tells you it&#8217;s a popular place.<\/p><p>But the most important ingredient isn&#8217;t one you can\nsee: magnanimity.<\/p><p>I am not a frequent, known, or favored customer at\nBetty&#8217;s. I don&#8217;t believe I looked especially desperate the\nmorning my wife and I showed up for\ncoffee. I think I looked like I could buy\nwhat they were selling if I needed or\nwanted to do so. And Betty&#8217;s is clearly a\nbusiness that sells outstanding food. But\nBetty and her husband have chosen to do\nbusiness magnanimously.<\/p><p>It would be easy to imagine that in the cynical atmosphere of the San Francisco Bay Area all this could be sneered at as customer manipulation, cheap advertising, or worse, economic stupidity! What people of every color, stripe, and class do instead is just get in line and smile, whether you end up paying for all you take away or not. Betty&#8217;s doesn&#8217;t add any hooks like punched coupon cards, or fliers to pass along to friends, or cute one-liners about future purchases or obligations.<\/p><p>Some places I go for coffee have small tasting plates of\ncookie crumbs or pastry fragments to tempt the customer.\nNot Betty&#8217;s. The place is heaped up with piles of their\ndelectable goods and what they give away is the whole\nthing or nothing. It&#8217;s unexpected. It&#8217;s shocking. It&#8217;s joyful.\nIt&#8217;s magnanimous. It&#8217;s tastes like grace.<\/p><p>For a pastor, Betty&#8217;s begs lots of questions: Is such\nmagnanimity the spirit and reputation of my church or of\nyours? Is heaped-up, open-handed goodness without\nstrings the love we share with people who come to our\ndoors, whether they&#8217;re regulars or not? Why do so many\nof us who claim to be ambassadors for abundant grace\nlive lives of stingy scarcity?<\/p><p>At Betty&#8217;s I was given something really good and the\ngiving of it was so free, so unself-conscious, and so personal.\nIs this how people leave after a visit to our church?<\/p><p>In the late afternoon of that same day, I unexpectedly\nfound myself back at Betty&#8217;s to meet a friend. Again, a cup\nof coffee was all I had in mind, though I admit I was looking\nforward to the pot pie and apple pie later than night.\nAs we stood in line, a clerk came along handing to each\nperson a delicious, warm cookie, presumably to make up\nfor our wait in line. When we got to the front, I ordered a\ncoffee and my friend ordered a coffee and a fried chicken\nsandwich. I asked our clerk out of curiosity how much an\napple pie cost. He told me, wondering if I wanted one.<\/p><p>&#8220;No, I am set,&#8221; I said, smiling. As he finished gathering\nour order together, the clerk stuck in a large piece of apple\npie, and two forks and said, &#8220;you will really enjoy this.&#8221;<\/p><p>And we did. And we&#8217;ll be back: magnanimity is in short\nsupply and Betty&#8217;s is the place. Is the church too?<\/p><p class=\"is-style-article-bio\">Mark Labberton is pastor of First Presbyterian Church in Berkeley, California<\/p><p class=\"is-style-article-copyright\">Copyright &copy; 2008 by the author or Christianity Today\/<em>Leadership<\/em> Journal.<a href=\"http:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/help\/permissions-privacy\/permissions.html\" target=\"_blank\" class=\"copyright\" rel=\"noopener\">Click here<\/a> for reprint information on <em>Leadership<\/em> Journal.<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>On a dark and dismal day a while back, my wife and I went for coffee at a place we like. We each ordered a latt\u00e9 and chose a pastry to split. The clerk, noting the other pastry we almost chose, put it in a separate bag and said, &#8220;Here, I think you&#8217;d really like <a class=\"more-link\" href=\"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/content\/bettys-secret-ingredient\/\">Read more&#8230;<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":30,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"tax_ctp_authors":[2398],"tax_ctp_books":[],"tax_ctp_categories":[154],"tax_ctp_field_guide_subcategory":[],"tax_ctp_field_guides":[],"tax_ctp_format":[131],"tax_ctp_multimedia":[],"tax_ctp_point_editor":[],"tax_publications":[708,156,711],"tax_ctp_tags":[3559,4043,4057,4264,5226,5242],"tax_ctp_topics":[],"class_list":["post-12888","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","tax_ctp_authors-mark-labberton","tax_publications-2008-leadership-journal","tax_publications-leadership-journal","tax_publications-summer_2008-leadership-journal","tax_ctp_tags-character","tax_ctp_tags-generosity","tax_ctp_tags-giving","tax_ctp_tags-integrity","tax_ctp_tags-values","tax_ctp_tags-vision"],"acf":{"scripture_references":null},"yoast_head":"<!-- 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