{"id":20829,"date":"2000-11-08T00:00:00","date_gmt":"2000-11-08T00:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/2000\/11\/08\/what-i-wish-id-known-before-i-quit-2\/"},"modified":"2000-11-08T00:00:00","modified_gmt":"2000-11-08T00:00:00","slug":"what-i-wish-id-known-before-i-quit-2","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/content\/what-i-wish-id-known-before-i-quit-2\/","title":{"rendered":"What I Wish I’d Known Before I Quit"},"content":{"rendered":"

“I<\/strong> can’t be your pastor anymore. I’m sorry.” My tiny congregation\n\t\t\tstared back in shock.<\/p>

In 1985, I’d moved to this promising community to start a church.\n\t\t\tI’d expected forty people at the inaugural worship service —\n\t\t\tfourteen showed up. Not until I decided to leave did our church\n\t\t\taverage forty in attendance.<\/p>

The low figure wasn’t for lack of hard work. I didn’t know as\n\t\t\tmuch as I’d thought I did, and ministry was much harder than I\n\t\t\thad anticipated. So I quit.<\/p>

Since then, I’ve learned some powerful lessons — ones I wish I’d\n\t\t\tknown before I quit.<\/p>

I WISH I’D KNOWN HOW MUCH PEOPLE LOVED ME<\/h2>

I’d believed the primary reason for anyone to love me was for\n\t\t\tproducing results as a leader. The day I resigned I began to\n\t\t\tlearn how much people loved me for who I WAS, not what I DID.<\/p>

I WISH I’D KNOWN HOW MUCH I LOVED THEM<\/h2>

After my resignation, the congregation met in our home to decide\n\t\t\thow it would carry on. That night, I couldn’t believe how much I\n\t\t\tloved these people. The same folks I’d been frustrated with —\n\t\t\tand blamed for my lack of success — were ones I now grieved over\n\t\t\tlosing. The bonds of affection had been there all along; I\n\t\t\tdetected them only when I tried to break free\n\t\t\tfrom them.<\/p>

I WISH I’D KNOWN HOW MUCH GOOD WAS HAPPENING<\/h2>

The week before I quit, I told my dad about my decision. He said,\n\t\t\t“Pay attention to what happens. I think you’ll notice much more\n\t\t\tgood is going on in your church than you would have imagined.”<\/p>

Those were prophetic words. People stepped up to ministry as soon\n\t\t\tas I got out of their way. Folks came into a relationship with\n\t\t\tGod because of seeds planted during my ministry. People called\n\t\t\tand wrote letters expressing how much they had benefited from my\n\t\t\tministry.<\/p>

I half-expected the church to fold. It didn’t. Instead it\n\t\t\tcontinued to slowly grow. I wish I’d seen that my people were\n\t\t\tbeyond where I thought they were.<\/p>

I WISH I’D KNOWN THERE WERE ALTERNATIVES TO QUITTING<\/h2>

I shared my decision with three men in my church a week before I\n\t\t\tquit. What I didn’t do was listen to them. They brought up three\n\t\t\talternatives I should have considered:<\/p>

    \n
  1. Take a leave of absence. Most churches really do love their\n\t\t\tpastors, and would much prefer to work out a time of absence for\n\t\t\thealing, rather than go through the divorce-and-remarriage\n\t\t\tprocess.<\/li>\n
  2. Talk with other pastors. They would have loved to help me. I\n\t\t\tdidn’t ask.<\/li>\n
  3. Work maintenance into the weekly routine. Failure is inevitable\n\t\t\tin ministry, and dealing with failure demands not only a\n\t\t\tspiritual strategy, but a physical one as well.<\/li>\n\n<\/ol>

    I WISH I’D KNOWN THE IMPORTANCE OF KEEPING SHARP<\/h2>

    For years, I thought I couldn’t afford conferences and books. I\n\t\t\tnow know I can’t afford to go without them.<\/p>

    I WISH I’D KNOWN HOW MUCH INAPPROPRIATE PRIDE WAS INVOLVED<\/h2>

    Pride prevented me from talking to others, from considering\n\t\t\toptions, or from taking time off. Pride kept me from saying, “I\n\t\t\tdon’t know what to do,” as opposed to saying, “I’m going to quit — end of discussion!”<\/p>

    I no longer ask if my resignation was a mistake. Instead I ask:\n\t\t\tHave I learned from that experience? When tempted to move, I ask:\n\t\t\tAm I committed to learn and grow, and not quit if at all\n\t\t\tpossible? These lessons have been used by Christ to create a\n\t\t\ttighter bond to the ministry I now serve.<\/p>

    Anthony Laird is pastor of East Tucson (Arizona) Baptist Church. To reply, write: Newsletter@LeadershipJournal.net<\/a><\/p>

    Sign up for the Church Leader’s Newsletter<\/a> and receive a new article plus useful information in your inbox every week!<\/p>

    Copyright © 2000 by the author or Christianity Today\/Leadership<\/em> Journal.Click here<\/a> for reprint information on Leadership<\/em> Journal.<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

    “I can’t be your pastor anymore. I’m sorry.” My tiny congregation stared back in shock.In 1985, I’d moved to this promising community to start a church. I’d expected forty people at the inaugural worship service — fourteen showed up. Not until I decided to leave did our church average forty in attendance.The low figure wasn’t Read more…<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":30,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"tax_ctp_authors":[854],"tax_ctp_books":[],"tax_ctp_categories":[142],"tax_ctp_field_guide_subcategory":[],"tax_ctp_field_guides":[],"tax_ctp_format":[131],"tax_ctp_multimedia":[],"tax_ctp_point_editor":[],"tax_publications":[156],"tax_ctp_tags":[3931,4012,4629,4688,4704,5046],"tax_ctp_topics":[],"class_list":["post-20829","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","tax_ctp_authors-anthony-laird","tax_publications-leadership-journal","tax_ctp_tags-failure","tax_ctp_tags-formation","tax_ctp_tags-perseverance","tax_ctp_tags-preaching","tax_ctp_tags-pride","tax_ctp_tags-spiritual-formation"],"acf":{"scripture_references":null},"yoast_head":"\nWhat I Wish I'd Known Before I Quit - CT Pastors<\/title>\n<meta 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