{"id":25049,"date":"1981-10-01T00:00:00","date_gmt":"1981-10-01T00:00:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/1981\/10\/01\/secret-of-true-harmony\/"},"modified":"1981-10-01T00:00:00","modified_gmt":"1981-10-01T00:00:00","slug":"secret-of-true-harmony","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/content\/secret-of-true-harmony\/","title":{"rendered":"THE SECRET OF TRUE HARMONY"},"content":{"rendered":"

It is only when a husband and wife pray together before God that they find the secret of true harmony: that the difference in their temperaments, their ideas, and their tastes enriches their home instead of endangering it. There will be no further question of one imposing his will on the other, or of the other giving in for the sake of peace. Instead, they will together seek God’s will, which alone will ensure that each will be fully able to develop his personality . . . When each of the marriage partners seeks quietly before God to see his own faults, recognizes his sin, and asks the forgiveness of the other, marital problems are no more. Each learns to speak the other’s language, and to meet him halfway, so to speak. Each holds back those harsh little words which one is apt to utter when one is right, but which are said in order to injure. Most of all, a couple rediscovers complete mutual confidence, because, in meditating in prayer together, they learn to become absolutely honest with each other . . . This is the price to be paid if partners very different from each other are to combine their gifts instead of setting them against each other.<\/p>\n\n

-Paul Tournier<\/p>\n\n

Copyright © 1981 by the author or Christianity Today\/Leadership Journal<\/em>.\nClick here<\/a> for reprint information on Leadership Journal<\/em>.<\/p>","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

It is only when a husband and wife pray together before God that they find the secret of true harmony: that the difference in their temperaments, their ideas, and their tastes enriches their home instead of endangering it. There will be no further question of one imposing his will on the other, or of the Read more…<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":30,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_acf_changed":false,"_jetpack_memberships_contains_paid_content":false,"footnotes":""},"tax_ctp_authors":[2665],"tax_ctp_books":[],"tax_ctp_categories":[142],"tax_ctp_field_guide_subcategory":[],"tax_ctp_field_guides":[],"tax_ctp_format":[131],"tax_ctp_multimedia":[],"tax_ctp_point_editor":[],"tax_publications":[572,573,156],"tax_ctp_tags":[4425,4679],"tax_ctp_topics":[],"class_list":["post-25049","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","tax_ctp_authors-paul-tournier","tax_publications-1981-leadership-journal","tax_publications-fall_1981-leadership-journal","tax_publications-leadership-journal","tax_ctp_tags-marriage","tax_ctp_tags-prayer"],"acf":{"scripture_references":null},"yoast_head":"\nTHE SECRET OF TRUE HARMONY - CT Pastors<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"It is only when a husband and wife pray together before God that they find the secret of true harmony: that the difference in their temperaments, their\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/content\/secret-of-true-harmony\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"THE SECRET OF TRUE HARMONY - CT Pastors\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"It is only when a husband and wife pray together before God that they find the secret of true harmony: that the difference in their temperaments, their\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:url\" content=\"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/content\/secret-of-true-harmony\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:site_name\" content=\"CT Pastors\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:publisher\" content=\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/CTPastors\" \/>\n<meta property=\"article:published_time\" content=\"1981-10-01T00:00:00+00:00\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:image\" content=\"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/19\/2025\/12\/ogimage.png?resize=1200,628\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:width\" content=\"1200\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:height\" content=\"628\" \/>\n\t<meta property=\"og:image:type\" content=\"image\/png\" \/>\n<meta name=\"author\" content=\"Paul Tournier\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:card\" content=\"summary_large_image\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:creator\" content=\"@CTpastors\" \/>\n<meta name=\"twitter:site\" content=\"@CTpastors\" \/>\n<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"yoast-schema-graph\">{\"@context\":\"https:\/\/schema.org\",\"@graph\":[{\"@type\":\"Article\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/content\/secret-of-true-harmony\/#article\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/content\/secret-of-true-harmony\/\"},\"author\":{\"name\":\"CMS Admin\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/#\/schema\/person\/85018388509706870f1ad6829069e1a3\"},\"headline\":\"THE SECRET OF TRUE HARMONY\",\"datePublished\":\"1981-10-01T00:00:00+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"1981-10-01T00:00:00+00:00\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/content\/secret-of-true-harmony\/\"},\"wordCount\":231,\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/#organization\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/content\/secret-of-true-harmony\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/content\/secret-of-true-harmony\/\",\"name\":\"THE SECRET OF TRUE HARMONY - CT Pastors\",\"isPartOf\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/#website\"},\"datePublished\":\"1981-10-01T00:00:00+00:00\",\"dateModified\":\"1981-10-01T00:00:00+00:00\",\"description\":\"It is only when a husband and wife pray together before God that they find the secret of true harmony: that the difference in their temperaments, their\",\"breadcrumb\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/content\/secret-of-true-harmony\/#breadcrumb\"},\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"ReadAction\",\"target\":[\"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/content\/secret-of-true-harmony\/\"]}]},{\"@type\":\"BreadcrumbList\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/content\/secret-of-true-harmony\/#breadcrumb\",\"itemListElement\":[{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":1,\"name\":\"Home\",\"item\":\"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/\"},{\"@type\":\"ListItem\",\"position\":2,\"name\":\"THE SECRET OF TRUE HARMONY\"}]},{\"@type\":\"WebSite\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/#website\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/\",\"name\":\"CT Pastors\",\"description\":\"Timeless wisdom for pastors with forward-thinking solutions\",\"publisher\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/#organization\"},\"potentialAction\":[{\"@type\":\"SearchAction\",\"target\":{\"@type\":\"EntryPoint\",\"urlTemplate\":\"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/?s={search_term_string}\"},\"query-input\":\"required name=search_term_string\"}],\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\"},{\"@type\":\"Organization\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/#organization\",\"name\":\"Christianity Today\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/\",\"logo\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/19\/2025\/08\/logo_ctpastors_black.svg\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/19\/2025\/08\/logo_ctpastors_black.svg\",\"caption\":\"Christianity Today\"},\"image\":{\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/\"},\"sameAs\":[\"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/CTPastors\",\"https:\/\/x.com\/CTpastors\"]},{\"@type\":\"Person\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/#\/schema\/person\/85018388509706870f1ad6829069e1a3\",\"name\":\"CMS Admin\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"inLanguage\":\"en-US\",\"@id\":\"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/\",\"url\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/7b746e0581dc75423e361301b595167f5234d819bbff5b0a82621db777cbfeb9?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"contentUrl\":\"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/7b746e0581dc75423e361301b595167f5234d819bbff5b0a82621db777cbfeb9?s=96&d=mm&r=g\",\"caption\":\"CMS Admin\"}}]}<\/script>\n<!-- \/ Yoast SEO plugin. -->","yoast_head_json":{"title":"THE SECRET OF TRUE HARMONY - CT Pastors","description":"It is only when a husband and wife pray together before God that they find the secret of true harmony: that the difference in their temperaments, their","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/content\/secret-of-true-harmony\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"THE SECRET OF TRUE HARMONY - CT Pastors","og_description":"It is only when a husband and wife pray together before God that they find the secret of true harmony: that the difference in their temperaments, their","og_url":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/content\/secret-of-true-harmony\/","og_site_name":"CT Pastors","article_publisher":"https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/CTPastors","article_published_time":"1981-10-01T00:00:00+00:00","og_image":[{"width":1200,"height":628,"url":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/19\/2025\/12\/ogimage.png?resize=1200,628","type":"image\/png"}],"author":"Paul Tournier","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_creator":"@CTpastors","twitter_site":"@CTpastors","schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"Article","@id":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/content\/secret-of-true-harmony\/#article","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/content\/secret-of-true-harmony\/"},"author":{"name":"CMS Admin","@id":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/#\/schema\/person\/85018388509706870f1ad6829069e1a3"},"headline":"THE SECRET OF TRUE HARMONY","datePublished":"1981-10-01T00:00:00+00:00","dateModified":"1981-10-01T00:00:00+00:00","mainEntityOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/content\/secret-of-true-harmony\/"},"wordCount":231,"publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/#organization"},"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/content\/secret-of-true-harmony\/","url":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/content\/secret-of-true-harmony\/","name":"THE SECRET OF TRUE HARMONY - CT Pastors","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/#website"},"datePublished":"1981-10-01T00:00:00+00:00","dateModified":"1981-10-01T00:00:00+00:00","description":"It is only when a husband and wife pray together before God that they find the secret of true harmony: that the difference in their temperaments, their","breadcrumb":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/content\/secret-of-true-harmony\/#breadcrumb"},"inLanguage":"en-US","potentialAction":[{"@type":"ReadAction","target":["https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/content\/secret-of-true-harmony\/"]}]},{"@type":"BreadcrumbList","@id":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/content\/secret-of-true-harmony\/#breadcrumb","itemListElement":[{"@type":"ListItem","position":1,"name":"Home","item":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/"},{"@type":"ListItem","position":2,"name":"THE SECRET OF TRUE HARMONY"}]},{"@type":"WebSite","@id":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/#website","url":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/","name":"CT Pastors","description":"Timeless wisdom for pastors with forward-thinking solutions","publisher":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/#organization"},"potentialAction":[{"@type":"SearchAction","target":{"@type":"EntryPoint","urlTemplate":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/?s={search_term_string}"},"query-input":"required name=search_term_string"}],"inLanguage":"en-US"},{"@type":"Organization","@id":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/#organization","name":"Christianity Today","url":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/","logo":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/19\/2025\/08\/logo_ctpastors_black.svg","contentUrl":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/19\/2025\/08\/logo_ctpastors_black.svg","caption":"Christianity Today"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/#\/schema\/logo\/image\/"},"sameAs":["https:\/\/www.facebook.com\/CTPastors","https:\/\/x.com\/CTpastors"]},{"@type":"Person","@id":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/#\/schema\/person\/85018388509706870f1ad6829069e1a3","name":"CMS Admin","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","inLanguage":"en-US","@id":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/#\/schema\/person\/image\/","url":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/7b746e0581dc75423e361301b595167f5234d819bbff5b0a82621db777cbfeb9?s=96&d=mm&r=g","contentUrl":"https:\/\/secure.gravatar.com\/avatar\/7b746e0581dc75423e361301b595167f5234d819bbff5b0a82621db777cbfeb9?s=96&d=mm&r=g","caption":"CMS Admin"}}]}},"parsely":{"version":"1.1.0","canonical_url":"https:\/\/christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/content\/secret-of-true-harmony\/","smart_links":{"inbound":0,"outbound":0},"traffic_boost_suggestions_count":0,"meta":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@type":"NewsArticle","headline":"THE SECRET OF TRUE HARMONY","url":"http:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/content\/secret-of-true-harmony\/","mainEntityOfPage":{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"http:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/content\/secret-of-true-harmony\/"},"thumbnailUrl":"","image":{"@type":"ImageObject","url":""},"articleSection":"Uncategorized","author":"Paul Tournier","creator":"Paul Tournier","publisher":{"@type":"Organization","name":"CT Pastors","logo":""},"keywords":[],"dateCreated":"1981-10-01T00:00:00Z","datePublished":"1981-10-01T00:00:00Z","dateModified":"1981-10-01T00:00:00Z"},"rendered":"<script type=\"application\/ld+json\" class=\"wp-parsely-metadata\">{\"@context\":\"https:\\\/\\\/schema.org\",\"@type\":\"NewsArticle\",\"headline\":\"THE SECRET OF TRUE HARMONY\",\"url\":\"http:\\\/\\\/www.christianitytoday.com\\\/pastors\\\/content\\\/secret-of-true-harmony\\\/\",\"mainEntityOfPage\":{\"@type\":\"WebPage\",\"@id\":\"http:\\\/\\\/www.christianitytoday.com\\\/pastors\\\/content\\\/secret-of-true-harmony\\\/\"},\"thumbnailUrl\":\"\",\"image\":{\"@type\":\"ImageObject\",\"url\":\"\"},\"articleSection\":\"Uncategorized\",\"author\":\"Paul Tournier\",\"creator\":\"Paul Tournier\",\"publisher\":{\"@type\":\"Organization\",\"name\":\"CT Pastors\",\"logo\":\"\"},\"keywords\":[],\"dateCreated\":\"1981-10-01T00:00:00Z\",\"datePublished\":\"1981-10-01T00:00:00Z\",\"dateModified\":\"1981-10-01T00:00:00Z\"}<\/script>","tracker_url":"https:\/\/cdn.parsely.com\/keys\/christianitytoday.com\/p.js"},"jetpack_featured_media_url":"","byline":{"writer_byline":"Paul Tournier","writer_byline_override":""},"primary_category":null,"secondary_categories":[],"featured_video":null,"related_articles":[],"jetpack_sharing_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25049","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/30"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=25049"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25049\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":25050,"href":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/25049\/revisions\/25050"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=25049"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"tax_ctp_authors","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tax_ctp_authors?post=25049"},{"taxonomy":"tax_ctp_books","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tax_ctp_books?post=25049"},{"taxonomy":"tax_ctp_categories","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tax_ctp_categories?post=25049"},{"taxonomy":"tax_ctp_field_guide_subcategory","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tax_ctp_field_guide_subcategory?post=25049"},{"taxonomy":"tax_ctp_field_guides","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tax_ctp_field_guides?post=25049"},{"taxonomy":"tax_ctp_format","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tax_ctp_format?post=25049"},{"taxonomy":"tax_ctp_multimedia","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tax_ctp_multimedia?post=25049"},{"taxonomy":"tax_ctp_point_editor","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tax_ctp_point_editor?post=25049"},{"taxonomy":"tax_publications","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tax_publications?post=25049"},{"taxonomy":"tax_ctp_tags","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tax_ctp_tags?post=25049"},{"taxonomy":"tax_ctp_topics","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.christianitytoday.com\/pastors\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tax_ctp_topics?post=25049"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}