I used to equate "women's ministry" with things like secret pals and salad suppers. Problem is I'm a horrible secret pal because I tend to forget birthdays and anniversaries. And I'm sorry, but I like warm food.

At one particularly memorable Christmas tea, which featured a desert reception, I nervously stuffed an entire chocolate-covered strawberry into my mouth in one bite. Who does that?! The other ladies at my table giggled nervously as strawberry-chocolate juice oozed from my lips.

As a young woman trying to balance a demanding career and a growing family, I'm lucky to find time to shave my legs, much less to carve out three hours to make chit-chat with people who are apparently way better at this "lady" thing than I am. I spent years wishing I could skip the women's events and just go do fun stuff with the men's groups. I just wanted feel safe being myself but the fellowship halls of my past were filled with women who didn't get me.

Then I met Heather. She, too, likes warm food. She, too, would totally stuff a chocolate-covered strawberry into her mouth if given the chance. As our friendship grew, ours became known as the "crazy" table at women's gatherings. I'm not sure if that was meant to be a compliment or not, but we were often joined by other women who seemed to enjoy the opportunity to let their guard down.

Just over two years ago, a brave planning committee seemed to think our friendship would be a good model for other women and they asked us to lead a ladies Bible study.

"Seriously?!" we wondered, "Do they really understand what they're getting into here? We're not even good at being ladies! How will we ever lead them?" But the more we thought about it, the more excited we became about the opportunity to create the atmosphere we had always longed for! Surely we weren't alone in needing authentic friendships and real, honest conversations.

We were asked to submit our Bible study topic to the committee so they could have a description for the Bible Study brochure. All we knew was we wanted women to be able to talk about whatever they are struggling with, knowing they would not be criticized and they would be prayed for. Somehow we managed to come with a paragraph that described what we were thinking, but even putting it in writing seemed, well, vague. We got the occasional comment about it being more of a "social" group - and we just smiled and went ahead with the direction we felt so strongly about taking.

When sign-ups started, women signed up! We thought, Oh shoot! It seemed like a good concept theoretically. Now we were going to actually have to make it work!

To the courageous women who came that first week, we started off by explaining our desire to facilitate meaningful conversations among women and we warned that no topic would be off-limits. Nothing they said would be used against them. We started by inviting the women to tell their stories, ask questions, whatever. We had no further agenda except that we would invite God to guide our conversations and reveal himself to us in the middle of our questions.

It has been more than two years since that first meeting and we have been blown away at how God is using the power of authenticity to bring healing and life-change! You've got to know, we're all very different women with really messy lives, but that's the beautiful thing! We have laughed until we cried - and cried until we laughed. And progress isn't magical or immediate in most cases, but it is happening!

There is an unspoken understanding that we're on sacred ground when a woman trusts the group with another "layer" of her heart. We aren't counselors and we don't claim to have all the answers, but we listen and pray for one another. And what a powerful thing it is to be known and accepted by other women. That's rare, I'm learning.

When we see each other on a Sunday morning, it's not, "Hi, how are you?" "Fine, how are you?" It's "How did the interview go?" or "Did you hear from the adoption agency?" or even, "Did you resist the urge to buy cigarettes?" But none of us will ever have to sit through another Christmas tea wondering, "Am I the only one here with issues?" I think that's the best part.