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Casual get-togethers are certainly fun, but there seem to be few opportunities for spouses to spruce up and enjoy an evening with those closest to them. Having a dinner party can be an opportunity to do just that. But from experience, most of us know that hosting a dinner party and enjoying one are two different things, especially when you and hubby are taking matters into your own hands. So, with the guidance of Ruth Kern, international etiquette consultant and founder of the Chicago-based etiquette consulting firm Modern Etiquette, we've designed an in-depth approach for you and your spouse that will help you create a memorable evening—and enjoy it together, too.

Set your event apart from others by letting your guests know that you are taking great care to create an experience just for them. Instead of giving a casual phone call, set the stage by sending invitations. These do not have to be expensive or adhere to any particular format. Be as creative as you want, and be sure to fit your budgeting goals. Whether hand-written or printed, you'll create anticipation for the evening to come.

Be sure to tell guests information they'll need to know. You may want to describe your party as, "A Couples' Christmas Banquet" or "A Holiday Formal," and let guests know how to dress for the occasion. Try phrases like "casual dress," "Sunday formal," or "black tie" to help guests understand the style. They'll want to know this, and it will help avoid potential embarrassment.

Be sure location and directions are clear. You may want to include maps, in case guests are unfamiliar with the roads. And, since the winter weather can make traveling more difficult, a few extra landmarks couldn't hurt.

For a dinner party, an earlier evening hour may be best. This gives guests time to enjoy themselves and still travel home at a good hour. However, depending on your style, day, and guests, choose a time that works best for all.

Since the holiday season tends to be busier than most, you can send invitations out as early as eight weeks before the day. Be sure to include the notation "R.S.V.P." with a telephone number, signaling guests that you want them to respondez, s'il vous plais or, "Respond, please." This will be important for your advance preparations. Allowing guests to respond up until the week before the party is plenty of time for them to make a decision and gives you ample time to prepare.

If you've decided not to invite children, you may want to note that on the invitation, and confirm how many people from each household will be attending as they respond. If you do not receive a response from a guest, be sure to call them; don't just assume they are not coming. You may find out they did not receive the invitation at all.

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