Why We Demand Answers from God After a Tragedy
Bargaining is our attempt to regain control of our lives.
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“Father, if you are willing, take this cup away from me—nevertheless, not my will, but yours, be done.” (Luke 22:42, CSB)
If it is Your will that Thy will be done
As it is in heaven, take from me this burden.
I want to be the exception, the one
Whose faith defies every fleshly reason.
What is the cost I am paying now to
Live in these bones You have called to great life?
If the temple of my being is flung
Wide-open to the shore, then I will live.
I will trade what You ask if only I
Live until death is no more than a myth.
I will give you my hair in exchange for
Your mercy over my sin-filled body.
You came so that I may have life to live.
Unbind my small hands from behind my back.
You request my name and rewrite it anew
For I have wrestled with more than a man.
I have wrestled with the kin-dom at hand.
My hip will remember the weight of this
As I limp toward the break of daylight.
I hear an August hymn call to me now.
The injuries of this world are fleeting.
Let me live to see tomorrow draw near.
Carolina Hinojosa-Cisneros is a Chicana storyteller. She is the 2019 recipient of the Rubem Alves Award in Theopoetics. She is a graduate student of English with emphases in literature, creative writing, and social justice at Our Lady of the Lake University.