Have you noticed that church names are getting increasingly strange? Our friend Dennis Baker has. He's been keeping a list of church names in order to document how far we've come from the days of "First Presbyterian" and "Springfield Baptist." He sent us the following list of 129 church names. I've added my reactions in parentheses.

1. Resonate

2. Revolution (Where only senior pastors get beheaded.)

3. Radiance (Where the female vocalists all glitter like Mariah Carey.)

4. Elevation (U2 songs every bloody Sunday.)

5. Restoration

6. Renovation (You can do it! God can help.)

7. Mosaic

8. enCompass (Wii th-|-nk [outside] the box. We R crAtiVe.)

9. Epiphany Station (Next stop, Conjunction Junction!)

10. Soma (Our pastor knows Greek.)

11. Sanctuary

12. Rock Harbor (If your life hasn't run aground yet, we can help.)

13. Journey ("Don't Stop Believing" is our theme song.)

14. The Rock (If film producer Michael Bay ever created a church…the pyrotechnics are amazing.)

15. The River (The pastor ends every sentence with "… in a van down by the river.")

16. The Flood (Natural disasters always provoke worship.)

17. The Bridge (William "the Fridge" Perry's post-ordination nickname.)

18. Bridges

19. Real Life Ministries (Where reality TV stars come for healing.)

20. Mars Hill (Mars was the god of war … prepare for battle.)

21. Imago Dei (Our pastor knows Latin … well, one phrase anyway.)

22. Corem Deo (Our favorite movie is Dead Poets Society.)

23. Celebration Church (We don't do funerals.)

24. Passion City (Not to be confused with the adult superstore on I-94.)

25. Oasis Church (Serenity Now! Serenity Now!)

26. Paradox (Modernity sucks.)

27. Renaissance Church (Are nude frescoes a distraction in worship?)

28. Origins (Home of the Young Earth Gospel. Darwin was a chump.)

29. Legacy (We're scared to death we won't have one.)

30. Tapestry (Our pastor really loves that "the threads don't make sense until you turn the cloth over" illustration.)

31. Church w/ No Walls (And a never-ending building campaign.)

32. Sojourners (Wait. We didn't know it was liberal Christian magazine too. Dang.)

33. Out Post (The parsonage is known as the "Out House.")

34. Generation (which one? X? Y? Pepsi? I'm confused.)

35. Encounter (Sounds like a ride at Epcot. Where are the aliens?)

36. Warehouse (Where Christians are organized, packaged, and safely stored until the rapture.)

37. Warehouse 180 (If we can't grow a church we'll start a nightclub.)

38. Relevant (Our name is writing checks the preacher may not be able to cash.)

39. Radiant (Sounds like a line of makeup for pre-teens.)

40. Elevate (Our pastor's pedestal is higher than yours.)

41. Illuminate (The lights are on but nobody's home.)

42. Anthem (For God and country. Yee haw!)

43. TerraNova (Trekkies for Jesus. Live long and prosper.)

44. Crux (Ah Shux. How cute.)

45. True Spirit Ministries

46. The Well (The un-well best worship elsewhere.)

47. Jacob's Well (Where bachelors hang out to find their future wives.)

48. Matthew's Party (Where the tax collectors and thieves have been replaced by IRS agents and investment bankers.)

49. The Brook

50. Awakening (We do early services like nobody else.)

51. Mercy Street (Where Sesame Street characters go for rehab. Cookie Monster has checked in 7 times.)

52. Expedition (Anything with an "x" is cool.)

53. Carpenter's Shed (Where church discipline happens the old fashioned way.)

54. Outcast Fellowship (The "Table 9" of churches.)

55. Flipside (If you don't get the reference to vinyl records, you're probably too young to attend.)

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