Learning from the Church Bulls - Christianity Today

According to the politics of an elk herd, there is room for only one bull in a harem of cows–especially during the rut. It is, of course, the biggest and the baddest bull who gets the harem. The lesser males are consigned to drift together in small herds or to operate on the fringe of the main herd or to wander aimlessly looking for a harem of their own.

In the universe of elk, there can be only one lead bull.

But what happens when you’ve been hired to be the lead bull, and you’re only a spike? When several other bulls in the herd are bigger than you?

RIVALS INSTEAD OF ALLIES

Seminaries train pastors more to be craftsmen than to be leaders. No doubt pastors are the best skilled in their congregation at the technical side of ministry: preparing sermons, giving pastoral care, administering the sacraments. But being a pastor is more than applying a set of skills; it also includes leadership.

Here’s the problem: many pastors bump up against lay people who are better leaders than they are. These individuals have both leadership gifts and leadership experience (often from the marketplace) that the pastor lacks.

That’s when the politics of elk take over. The spike bull (read: pastor) tries to lead his herd (read: congregation) in which he is not the biggest bull (read: the strongest leader). An invisible competition creeps into church relationships, which most lay leaders feel.

I’ve heard business executives complain how disenfranchised they feel because not only is their leadership at church not fully exercised, it also creates competition between them and their pastor. The strong leaders become a threat to the spike bull. Our lay leaders become rivals rather than allies.

MENTORING IN THE SPECIFICS

But it doesn’t have to be that way.

What if a pastor would say to his strong leaders, “I may know Greek and Hebrew, but you know leadership. I can help you in the spiritual disciplines. Will you help me learn what you know about leadership?”

It’s amazing what happens when you’re willing to praise talent in somebody else and then ask him or her to invest in you. One of the best ways to do this is to look for one aspect of leadership that the strong leader does particularly well. Nobody becomes a leader without doing something better than everyone else.

For example, I said to one businessman in my church, “I’ve noticed that you have an uncanny ability to motivate those working under you. Could you mentor me in how to motivate the people that report to me?”

Having a specific agenda, in fact, works better than just asking someone in your church to mentor you: “Gee, Obi Wan, why don’t you make me a Jedi like you.” It’s helpful to define narrowly what you want to learn from that leader. Most business leaders have never mentored someone. They may connect a lot of mysterious symbolism with mentoring, so it’s best to be clear about what you want from the relationship.

This way, several top-notch leaders can mentor me at the same time. This one thing may be the only area I’ve seen in this leader’s life that I want to replicate in mine, but it can still help me in ministry.

THE ENCOURAGEMENT BUSINESS

I have a friend who is the president of a publicly held company in Newport Beach. He is a notorious encourager. He uses his car phone more to encourage people than he does to make deals.

I went to him and said, “I’m in the encouragement business, but you do a better job of it than I do. Give me some of your tips. Tell me the regimen you place in your life to make your effectiveness possible.”

He was the most delighted guy in town. He told me about the pocket-sized card on which he has the names of thirty guys he calls every month without fail. He may call thirty of them on the same day. Or he may call them over the course of thirty days. He has no agenda; he calls each person just to find out how they’re doing.

Well, how many people call just to see how you’re doing? Most people who call give you the polite romance talk on the front end of some demand they want to make. But not my friend.

“I’m just calling to see how you’re doing,” he says, and he means it. And when he has heard the update, he hangs up.

These people discover that when this guy calls and says “I only called because I care about you,” he means it. So the next time he calls and they’re not in, he’s the first person they call back. And when you ask them, “What do you think about that guy?” they say he’s the most important person on their list. I needed that lesson in my ministry.

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Bob Shank is pastor of South Coast Community Church in Newport Beach, California.