RadicalMentoring.com sets expectations high with testimonials like “God changed my life through this program” and “It saved my marriage!” Fortunately, pastors whose churches lack lay leadership (and cash) will find much value here. The site offers tools that, in the right hands, can be used to train a group of leaders committed to discipling others.
The Radical Mentoring program was developed in 2010 by Regi Campbell, an entrepreneur and elder at Andy Stanley’s North Point Church in Alpharetta, Georgia. Campbell hopes to eliminate a strictly “one-on-one” view of mentoring. Instead, mentors meet monthly with discipleship groups for a year. Between meetings, mentees are given books to read, homework assignments to complete, and verses to memorize.
This program isn’t for slackers. One lesson plan suggests, “If someone is late … force them to walk in and take their seat in silence. Let them feel the pain without … overtly embarrassing them.” Radical Mentoring demands accountability. The idea is that if participants are held to a higher standard, they will rise to meet (and exceed) expectations.
The regimen may be intense, but mentors will find lesson planning surprisingly simple. The site offers suggestions on group formation and meeting preparation. Then mentors can choose from 25 lessons, each of which includes an introductory video and PDF download. Handouts are print-ready, and each lesson is already scheduled down to the minute.
You’ll have to buy your own books (a new one each month). These books aren’t supplemental; they make up the bulk of each lesson’s content. It’s a one-time investment if you buy a church set, but it does feel like opening a Christmas gift and reading, “Batteries not included.”
Also, with major sections like “Fatherhood” and homework assignments that recommend increasing physical contact with your wife and kids, the program is designed for married males only. The site says they’re working on a track for “single guys,” but if you’re hoping to mentor women in your congregation, you’ll have to visit their sister site, Titus2MentoringWomen.com.—Kyle Rohane
Gray Matters
Navigating The Space Between Legalism and Liberty By Brett McCracken (Baker Books, 2013)
The Facts: “Christians have a hard time with nuance. Gray areas are not our strong suit.” So says Brett McCracken in Gray Matters. McCracken has a point. When it comes to popular culture, we often struggle with balancing engagement and discernment. It is much easier to say “yes” or “no” to things and far less satisfactory to say “maybe” or “sometimes,” even if those are wiser answers. This book explores four of the most complex, and divisive, categories of culture we consume: food, music, movies, and alcohol. It does not defend all culture nor categorically condemn it. The book seeks to help Christians learn how to be discerning consumers of culture so that we can truly appreciate God’s creativity and glory in it.
The Slant: McCracken is a journalist, movie reviewer, and self-described foodie who travels widely. All this contributes to his keen sense of popular culture. And as someone who grew up in the church, he brings an insider’s understanding of the Christian sub-culture. Gray Matters is an effort to close the divide between the two by equipping readers to think more carefully about culture while demonstrating greater sensitivity toward fellow believers. McCracken meticulously explores the divisive aspects of popular culture and strikes a balance between mindless acceptance and reactionary rejection. He asks readers to rest in the gray areas, no matter how uncomfortable it may be, for the sake of honoring God and loving each another.—Barnabas Piper
Book Excerpt
Identifying Growth Potential By Rick Dunn and Jana L. Sundene
Keith Anderson and Randy Reese have written, “Mentoring is deeply relational, wisely alert to the movement of God in the dailyness of life and anchored in the passionate love for God and for the growth of the mentoree.” Becoming “wisely alert” to the movement of God in the life of the young adult you mentor is best done by working to identify obvious growth areas, hidden growth areas, and growth obstacles.
When someone comes to us having already identified an area where they need to grow, we almost always start there.
Obvious growth areas. The easiest area to discern will be growth frontiers—obvious places that need attention, exploration or expansion. These areas may jump out at you as you observe or interact with the young adult you’re mentoring. For example, you may both be aware that his next step needs to be learning to control his tongue in his interactions with others. Or she may come right out and tell you that she wants to grow in self-discipline because she has already identified it as an area of weakness. He may identify that his next step in maturity needs to be developing compassion or becoming more involved in serving the underprivileged. The disciples themselves may make the area that needs to be the focus of your intentional growth times them clear.
Hidden growth areas. When someone comes to us having already identified an area where they need to grow, we almost always start there. However, sometimes a growth frontier is a veneer for something beneath the surface. A healthy, meaningful relationship with a disciplemaker who is discerning provides an outstanding opportunity for the disciple to become consciously aware of these hidden areas. She may be unaware of how she resists relationships, for instance. Or he may not know that his sarcasm affects others.
Hidden growth areas are often multilayered. Motivations, ingrained patterns, deeply established lies, worldviews, assumptions, behavioral or character issues, or deep-seated fears can be potential culprits. Discernment can occur by noticing patterns emerging over time or sensing a common root for multiple issues. Probing questions like the following can help you discern areas that may be in need of transformation:
- What do you think your reasons behind that choice are?
- What scares you most about this situation?
- When have you sensed (or faced, acted like, felt or chosen like) that in the past?
- What kinds of assumptions about God might be leading you to that conclusion?
- How do you think your perspective on this matches up with God’s Big Story?
Special growth obstacles. Be alert to obstacles that hold the disciple of Christ back from enjoying and flourishing in the Christ life. Growth obstacles are particularly troublesome habits or hurts that clog the inflow of grace—the connection to God as a life-giving source—in a disciple’s life. They’re debilitating to the disciple’s sense of spiritual well-being, and may take the form of addiction, idolatry, misplaced dependence, or pain. Because a sense of shame may accompany growth obstacles, it can take a long time for disciples to admit their struggle. They may, for example, feel embarrassed to admit their inability to conquer a habitual sin, or humiliated at the thought of sharing about the pain of abuse.
Learning to discern potential growth areas (obvious, hidden, and special obstacles) is an essential practice to helping young adults grow.
Excerpted from Shaping the Journey of Emerging Adults (IVP, 2012) by Richard R. Dunn and Jana L. Sundene.
Leaders by Example
How you can help grow the next crop of ministry leaders.
BuildingChurchLeaders.com has a downloadable resource, “Mentoring New Leaders.” The 20-page resource offers guidance on how to mentor prospective leaders. The download features profiles of church leaders mentoring new leaders and offers advice on how best to train and nurture future leaders through mentoring relationships. Visit BuildingChurchLeaders.com
Can I Get a Mentor?
Tips for selecting the mentor right for you.
Finding a Mentor is a 42-page resource available at Today’s Christian Woman. The articles in the resource make the case for why leaders need mentors, explains how different types of relationship cultivate different kinds of growth, and provides questions to explore with a mentor. Visit TodaysChristianWoman.com
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