Books
Excerpt

Those God Sends, He First Humbles

Isaiah 6 filled me with world-changing zeal. But I needed to reckon with the whole passage.

Illustration by Abigail Erickson / Source Images: Unsplash

I am of the “Don’t waste your life!” generation, a generation of young people in the church who believed their greatest call was to not settle for mediocrity in their Christian life.

Curious Faith

Curious Faith

Baker Pub Group/Baker Books

192 pages

$5.49

I will never forget going to a young adult conference in my early 20s where we heard Isaiah 6 preached with such a fervor that even if we were saved already, we got saved again. Passion was the proof of salvation, zeal was the evidence of our faith, “Send me!” was our mantra, and “world changers” was our identity. We all wanted to be used by God, but none of us wanted to fold up the chairs afterward.

By the time I reached my late 20s, I was so worn out from trying so darn hard to be used by God that I felt, literally, used by God. Used up by him, so emptied out by him that I had nothing left to give anyone, including my own self. I beat my fists against my steering wheel, shouting expletives at him on my drive to work at a church. I sobbed on my bedroom floor at night and showed up to serve at our college ministry. I penciled question after question to him in my notebooks and then pretended to have the answers at Bible studies. I was the definition of the whitewashed tombs Jesus spoke about in Matthew 23:27: pretending to be clean on the outside but rotting to death on the inside.

We love the “Here am I. Send me!” part of Isaiah 6 (v. 8). We even love the vision of the throne room, the cherubim and seraphim flying back and forth, eternally singing the praises of the Holy One. Of course we want to serve the Lord God Almighty. Of course we want to be sent out by him. Of course we wouldn’t dare say anything else in the sight of that holiness.

Except Isaiah does. And if we miss what Isaiah says before he answers the Lord’s question, then we miss everything. He stands before glory and becomes undone. “Woe to me! … I am ruined! For I am a man of unclean lips, and I live among a people of unclean lips, and my eyes have seen the King, the Lord Almighty” (v. 5).

When we come to the end of ourselves, we begin to see that a faith built upon our skills, gifts, charisma, or good deeds for God is a house of cards. Otherwise, I just don’t know how we can have the “Send me!” moment. Not really. Not sustainably.

Somewhere along the way, we’re going to come smacking against a wall in our faith where our questions and doubts are insurmountable because the work we do stops seeming so grand or rewarding.

That’s when we see that the glory we were trying to capture was mostly for ourselves. And we discover that serving the Lord is more like carrying a cross than standing on a stage.

Lore Ferguson Wilbert, A Curious Faith, Brazos, a division of Baker Publishing Group, © 2022. Used by permission of the publisher. www.bakerpublishinggroup.com.

Also in this issue

Our cover story this month argues that Christians have a unique opportunity, in our difficult housing market, to model for the watching world better kinds of community—not only inside our homes, but also out in the towns and cities where we live. Also in this issue: Dallas Willard's worries, enforcing abortion bans, and Afghanistan refugees a year after the pullout.

Cover Story

There Are Many Mansions in Heaven, but We’d Like Something Sooner

Reply All

The Grain of Truth Grows Slowly

Revelation Is Good News for Today, not a Game Plan for the Future

Echoes of Greatness

Testimony

Police Work Nearly Broke Me

If God Is Your Father, You Have Seven Mothers

Stopping Abuse Is Sexual Ethics 101

News

The Curious Case of Coronavirus Contagion in Church

News

Something Old, Something New. Something Borrowed, Something Pew.

News

Christian Nonprofit Buys Luxury Yacht

New & Noteworthy Books

Our September Issue: Modeling Home

How Americans Got Away with Abortion Before ‘Roe v. Wade’

Why Shamelessness Is a Superpower

News

Back to Bolsonaro? Evangelicals Hesitate Ahead of October Election

Americans Forgot How Long Refugee Resettlement Takes

News

Four Out of Five Victims Don’t Report Sexual Assault. Can Christian Colleges Do Better?

Dallas Willard’s 3 Fears About the Spiritual Formation Movement

Playing the Cultural Long Game

Review

The Unsung Heroes of the Underground Railroad

Review

There Is No One Fully Optimized, Not Even One

View issue

Our Latest

Where Ya From?

Courage Through Crisis with Brady Boyd

Hear Pastor Brady Boyd share his experience building bridges that bring the gospel to the tipping points of our culture.

The Russell Moore Show

How Great Is the Political Divide?

George Packer speaks on the desire for a better republic.

The Bulletin

Stop. Look. Listen. | Voting Republican

The Bulletin’s Stop. Look. Listen. miniseries, part three: Why Eric Teetsel is voting Republican.

Being Human

‘Healing What’s Within’ with Chuck DeGroat

The therapist and author talks about coming home to God and ourselves.

The Bulletin

Friends in High Places

The Bulletin discusses the power of swing states and the threat of China and the axis of adversaries.

The Russell Moore Show

Detoxing, Mapquesting, and Holy Kisses

What Carlos Whittaker learned while living alongside monks and the Amish.

Where Ya From?

Journey to Justice with Jonathan Irons

Hear Jonathan Irons share his 23½-year fight for justice.

Apple PodcastsDown ArrowDown ArrowDown Arrowarrow_left_altLeft ArrowLeft ArrowRight ArrowRight ArrowRight Arrowarrow_up_altUp ArrowUp ArrowAvailable at Amazoncaret-downCloseCloseEmailEmailExpandExpandExternalExternalFacebookfacebook-squareGiftGiftGooglegoogleGoogle KeephamburgerInstagraminstagram-squareLinkLinklinkedin-squareListenListenListenChristianity TodayCT Creative Studio Logologo_orgMegaphoneMenuMenupausePinterestPlayPlayPocketPodcastRSSRSSSaveSaveSaveSearchSearchsearchSpotifyStitcherTelegramTable of ContentsTable of Contentstwitter-squareWhatsAppXYouTubeYouTube