Backsliding

In her testimony for Christianity Today, Caresse Spencer recounts how she demolished her faith in pursuit of her "best life" during the pandemic.

In 2020, I typed two lethal words: F- God. With that, I resigned from Christianity. As the world fell apart due to the pandemic, my faith crumbled too. I stripped my vocabulary of the term God, soaked in the oppression of my past. Anger consumed me.

Caresse began questioning Christian teachings, especially around sexuality and biblical contradictions. Years of suppressing her desires left her feeling robbed and burdened by faith. Torn between the God she once served and her true self, she finally chose herself, embarking on what she called a “world tour”-exploring queer love, polyamory, sex, drugs, and even other religions. “I said yes to everything I had once denied myself and believed I had found freedom.”

Initially, the rebellion felt exhilarating: “There’s a rush that comes with rebellion and a thrill in doing things once feared.” But anxiety and emptiness crept in. She found herself “floating in a vast emptiness-lost and scared. Life had lost its meaning.” When rebellion no longer satisfied, she was left with “no God, no faith, no love, no peace.”

Suicidal thoughts became a constant presence. At her lowest, she cried out, “Help me!” and then a Christian friend called, asking if she was okay. For the first time, she admitted she was not. Her friend’s support pulled her back from the brink. Later, her sister gently asked, “Do you want to surrender?” Caresse accepted: “It was the invitation I’d been waiting for without even knowing it. I said yes-to surrendering my pride, confusion, rebellion, and emptiness. My life changed in an instant.”

Now, she talks to God about everything and has found peace. “God refused to let me die in disbelief. Because of this grace, I now understand that the only way to find true life is to lose it first.”

American Protestants are keeping their children in the faith at a higher rate than Catholics or the una­ffiliated. The biggest influence: mothers.

Children Of Two Protestant Parents:

80% are still Protestant

13% are now unaffiliated

2% are now Catholic

Children Of Two Catholic Parents:

62% are still Catholic

19% are now unaffiliated

16% are now Protestant

Children Of Two Unaffiliated Parents:

63% are still unaffiliated

29% are now Protestant

7% are now Catholic

Children Of A Protestant Mother And Catholic Father:

49% are now Protestant

25% are now unaffiliated

14% are now Catholic

Children Of A Protestant Mother And Unaffiliated Father:

61% are now Protestant

29% are now unaffiliated

2% are now Catholic

Passengers on an Emirates flight bound for Auckland, New Zealand that left Dubai one Friday morning ended up landing back at the same airport where it took off a little more than 13 hours later.

Flight EK448 departed at 10:30 a.m. local time but the pilot turned around nearly halfway into the almost 9,000-mile journey, landing back in Dubai just after midnight Saturday, according to FlightAware.

Auckland Airport was forced to close due to severe flooding. The airport statement said, "Auckland Airport has been assessing the damage to our international terminal and unfortunately determined that no international flights can operate today. We know this is extremely frustrating but the safety of passengers is our top priority."

Emirates said in a statement, "We regret the inconvenience caused to customers. Emirates will continue to monitor the situation in Auckland and issue updates where required."

Possible Preaching Angle:

Have you ever started on a long trip only to experience one complication after another only to find yourself right back where you started? In that case, you might begin to understand the frustration of the Israelites, who through disobedience, had to turn away in sight of the Promised Land and spend 40 years going around in circles in the desert before they returned to where they had started on the border of the Promised Land.

In the early 1950s teenage Lyle Dorsett and his family moved to Birmingham from Kansas City, Missouri. They were outsiders, often labeled Yankees by peers. But one summer evening in 1953, Dorsett was walking to his house after work and decided to take a shortcut through the campus of then-Howard College (now Samford University).

He was immediately intrigued by the sight he saw: a large tent on the football field featuring a magnetic preacher. As Dorsett drew near, he could hear evangelist Eddie Martin preaching on the parable of the prodigal son, calling other prodigals to come home. Dorsett said, “I knew I was the prodigal and … needed to come home.”

Martin asked those in attendance to return the next evening. Dorsett came early, and this time was seated near the front. When the call came, “the evangelist led me through a sinner’s prayer. I confessed my need for forgiveness. While being led in prayer, I strongly felt the presence of Jesus Christ. I sensed his love and forgiveness as well as his call to preach the gospel.”

Shortly thereafter, Dorsett and his parents joined a local Baptist church. However, 18 months later, Dorsett’s family moved back to Kansas City. On his return, gradually he drifted. During his time in college, he embraced a materialistic worldview. He received a Ph.D. in history but despite professional success, he began to drink heavily and became an alcoholic. His wife, Mary, who became a Christian after their marriage, began to pray.

One evening, he stormed out of the house after Mary asked him not to drink around the children. He found a bar and drank until closing. While driving up a winding mountain road, he stopped at an overlook and blacked out. The next morning, he woke up on a dirt road at the bottom of a mountain next to a cemetery not having any memory of the drive.

Dorsett cried out to God, “Lord, if you are there, please help me.” At that moment, he recognized that the same presence he had met in Birmingham was with him in the car and loved him. The prodigal son had finally, truly come home. He said, “Although I made countless mistakes, the Lord never gave up on me.”

God then called Dorsett to full-time ministry, ordination in the Anglican Church, and eventually to the Billy Graham Chair of Evangelism at Beeson Divinity School, Samford University, where he had first heard God’s call to preach.

He concludes,

Over the years God has proved to be a gentle Comforter—like when Mary underwent massive surgery for cancer, and when our 10-year-old daughter died unexpectedly. Certainly, the most humbling and reassuring lesson is his persistence in drawing me to himself. And it was he who pursued me and sustained the relationship when I strayed in ignorant sheeplike fashion, doubted his existence, and then like the Prodigal Son deliberately moved to the far country. And it is all grace—unearned, undeserved, unrepayable grace.

Almost five years to the day after he returned home the first time, the prodigal son emptied his bank account, packed a few changes of clothes, and snuck off for the faraway country. Again.

The first year back he was just glad to be home.

The second year was toughest; he still couldn’t get (rid of) … the shame that chewed away at his soul.

The third year, things leveled out a little. He started feeling more at home, back in synch with his former life.

The fourth year, certain things began to irk him. His old itches longed to be scratched.

And the fifth year, it happened. All the former allurements came knocking, rapping their knuckles on his heart’s front door.

And so the prodigal relapsed. Re-sinned. Re-destroyed his life.

You know him—or her. Maybe it’s your best friend. Maybe it's your child. Or maybe it’s you. That thing you swore you’d never do again, you did it last night. You left the straight and narrow. Prodigals have a way of finding themselves right back in the pigsty.

In that moment … heaven and hell contend within you. Hell shouts, “Now you’ve gone and done it. You stupid piece of garbage. You’re a lost, lonely, hopeless cause. You’re a pig. And that’s all you’ll ever be.”

But there is another voice. It’s the voice of heaven, the familiar lilt of a Dad’s voice, echoing down the long hallways of hope … down to the deepest, darkest caverns of your pain. He doesn’t accuse. He doesn’t berate. He only mouths two simple words … of heaven’s redemptive love: “Come Home.”

The second time, the third time, the thousandth time, he will sprint … to meet you down the street, throw his arms around you, kiss you, and command that the fattened calf be barbecued. The Father is standing on the porch, his hand shading the sun from his eyes, scanning the horizon for the familiar image of the one who will ever remain, his precious, beloved child. “Come home.”

Generations placed the Muppet masters Jim Henson and Frank Oz on the level of comedy duos like Abbott & Costello and Laurel & Hardy. Henson died in 1990, but Oz continued to portray such beloved characters as Miss Piggy, Fozzie Bear, Bert, and Grover. Since the early 2000s, though, the puppeteer and filmmaker has been an infrequent presence in the extended Muppet-verse.

Disney acquired the rights to the Muppets in 2004, and many, including Oz himself, feel that this once rich franchise has lost its soul, and consequently, its audience. In an interview, Oz shared, "The soul’s not there. The soul is what makes things grow and be funny."

Once when asked how Disney could salvage the iconic franchise, the interviewer suggested the possibility of hiring "a unique, creative soul, to come in and do something new with the Muppets?" Oz had this to say:

I don’t think the answer is to do something new. I think the answer is to go back and be true to who they are. There’s nothing new to do except to dig deeper into their purity and innocence; that is what speaks to the audience. The problem was, in my opinion, that they were trying to do something new.

Perhaps his advice would be wise council for the Western church today. Maybe the church should not do something "new." The answer is to "go back and be true to who they are." To return to the purity and innocence of the gospel message.

Author Meghan O'Gieblyn, explores meaning, morality, and faith. She recalls the role of thinking and reason during her days at Bible College:

When I was a Christian, I had a naive, unquestioning faith in the faculty of higher thought, in my ability to comprehend objective truths about the world. ... People often decry the thoughtlessness of religion, but when I think back on my time in Bible school, it occurs to me that there exist few communities where thought is taken so seriously. We spent hours arguing with each other—in the dining hall, in the campus plaza—over the finer points of predestination or the legitimacy of covenant theology.

Beliefs were real things that had life-or-death consequences. A person’s eternal fate depended on a willingness to accept or reject the truth—and we believed implicitly that logic was the means of determining those truths. Even when I began to harbor doubts…. I maintained an essential trust in the notion that reason would reveal to me the truth.

Today, no longer a believer, she has her doubts:

I no longer believe in God. I have not for some time. I now live with the rest of modernity in a world that is “disenchanted.” ... I live in a university town, a place that is populated by people who consider themselves called to a “life of the mind.” Yet my friends and I rarely talk about ideas or try to persuade one another of anything. It’s understood that people come to their convictions by elusive forces: some combination of hormones, evolutionary biases, and unconscious needs. Twice a week I attend a yoga class where I am instructed to “let go of the thinking mind.”

God blessed actor Matthew McConaughey and his wife, Camila Alves, with a little boy. As his son’s birthday approached, the star opened up about how the Bible inspired him to choose the name Levi.

Matthew is pretty outspoken about his Christian faith. But it wasn’t always that way. The star admits he drifted away from faith when he first became famous. He stopped going to church all together, caught up in life as a Hollywood superstar.

But Camila’s devotion to Christ reminded him of what really matters. He was inspired to return to his faith, and even had his favorite Bible verse (Matt. 6:22) engraved on his wedding band as a way of honoring the person who brought him back to Christ. “The light of the body is the eye; if then your eye is true, all your body will be full of light.”

That same verse played a huge role in Matthew’s life while he and Camila were expecting. The couple decided against finding out the gender of their baby. So, they had a list of seven names to choose from. He said, "Levi’s another name for Matthew in the Bible. We had talked about possibly Matthew, Jr. if he was a boy.”

But soon after the doctor announced to the couple they’d had a boy it became clear Levi was the perfect fit. After spending some time cuddling with their precious baby boy, the doctor handed them a card to fill out with the boy’s chosen name. Listed on the card was their son’s birth time—exactly 6:22pm. And with the time perfectly matching his favorite verse, the Bible inspired Matthew McConaughey to decide on Levi!

The 2010s were a tipping point for global Christianity. Now, in 2020, more than half the world’s Christians live in Africa and Latin America, according to a new report from the Center for the Study of Global Christianity. The portion of Christians in Europe has also fallen below 25% for the first time since the Middle Ages.

The change was predicted by historian Philip Jenkins, among others. Jenkins wrote in 2007, “We are living through one of the transforming moments in the history of religion worldwide, as the center of gravity in the Christian world has shifted inexorably . . . southward.” The demographic trends are expected to continue into this decade.

Percentage of the world’s Christians 2010 compared to 2020:

USA & Canada: Down from 12% to 9%

Europe: Down from 25% to 23%

Asia: Up from 15% to 16%

Latin America: Up from 24% to 25%

Africa: Up from 22% to 26%

America is still a "Christian nation," if the term simply means a majority of the population will claim the label when a pollster calls. But, as a Pew Research report explains, the decline of Christianity in the United States "continues at a rapid pace." A bare 65 percent of Americans now say they're Christians, down from 78 percent as recently as 2007. The deconverted are mostly moving away from religion altogether, and the ranks of the religiously unaffiliated—the "nones"—have swelled from 16 to 26 percent over the same period. If this rate of change continues, the US will be majority non-Christian by about 2035, with the nones representing well over one third of the population.

In what remains of the American church, reactions to this decline will vary. Some will see it as a positive, revealing of what was always true. America was never really a Christian nation. What we're seeing is less mass deconversion than a belated honesty. Others will respond to this shift with sadness, alarm, or outright fear. If you believe that your religion communicates a necessary truth about God, the universe, humanity, the purpose of life, and how we should live it—well, then a precipitous decline in that religion is an inherently horrible thing with eternal implications for millions.

In a book titled Faith For Exiles, David Kinnaman and Mark Matlock looked at what separates young people who grew up in church and remain actively engaged in their faith and those that are no longer committed to core Christian beliefs and behaviors.

One thing they noticed is that “resilient disciples,” their name for the ones who stayed committed to core principles of the faith, experience far greater joy and intimacy with Jesus.

Compared to those that simply attend church, “resilient disciples” are far more likely to say that their relationship with Jesus brings them joy (90% vs. 48%), shapes their whole life in body, mind, heart, and soul (88% vs. 51%), and impacts the way they live every day (86% vs. 49%).

They also have a richer prayer life. Resilient disciples are more likely to say that time with Jesus reenergizes their life (87% vs. 46%), reading the Bible makes them feel closer to God (87% vs. 44%), listening to God is a big part of their prayer life (78% vs. 48%), and prayer does not feel like a chore but a vibrant part of their life (64% vs. 39%).

What does it take to raise children who will continue in the faith as adults? A study from the Barna Group set out to study what they call “resilient disciples,” that is, 18-29-year olds who attend church regularly, trust in the Bible, are personally committed to Jesus, and with a desire to influence broader society.

They found that “resilient disciples” make up only 10% of young people who grew up Christian. Another 38% attend church regularly, but do not meet core beliefs and behaviors associated with being an engaged disciple. 30% identify as Christian, but no longer attend church, and 22% have left the faith altogether.

Here are the five traits of a “resilient disciple”:

1. They experience intimacy with Jesus

2. They practice cultural discernment

3. They have meaningful spiritual relationships

4. They engage in counter-cultural mission

5. They have a sense of calling in their life and work

In a survey conducted by NPR and The Marist Poll last November, almost half of all American adults planned to make New Year’s resolutions. Leading the pack was the intent on exercising more.

An analysis from Strava found that we’re most likely to give up as early as mid-January. CityLab decided to look at data from Google and a fitness trade association, along with information collected from smartphones by Strava and Foursquare.

As you might expect, we start off strong. “Google trends shows that searches for topics related to exercise and weight loss spike right around January 1 each year.” Almost 11% of all gym memberships for the entire year are sold in January—greater than any other month.

So when do we start to fall off the wagon? Strava says it’s the third Thursday of January when activities dip below the four-week average of activity. Foursquare looks at when there is the first uptick in fast food eating and the first downtick in exercise activity. The forecast for this year places that day “on February 9, the second Saturday of the month, and just 40 days into the new year.”

Police cited a woman for speeding, hoping it would help her to slow down in the immediate future. Their hopes were in vain.

Deputies with the Lincoln County Sheriff's Department pulled over Chauntl Wilson for driving her yellow 2018 Ford Mustang over the speed limit, clocking her at 92 miles per hour when the limit was 75. However, after issuing the citation and letting her go, the deputies were surprised when she "accelerated very rapidly" and was shortly clocked again at a speed of 142 miles per hour, almost double the legal limit.

After engaging her in a pursuit, Wilson initially resisted, then eventually relented, and was eventually arrested and charged with willful reckless driving. Police also recovered a small amount of marijuana, which could result in further charges.

Potential Preaching Angle: Making a mistake is bad, but it's so much worse when we already know what is right but refuse to do it. Our knowledge of the truth makes us accountable for living it out with our actions.

In Deep Down Dark, Hector Tobar tells the story of 33 Chilean miners who were trapped 2,000 feet below the surface for 69 days. They had to live in the dark, with almost no food, cut off from the rest of the world. They didn't know if they would ever see daylight again. Many of the miners, face-to-face with imminent death, took stock of their lives and realized they had a lot of regrets. Somebody asked Jose Henriquez, a Christian, if he would pray for everyone.

As he got down on his knees, some of the other men joined him, and he began to talk to God: "We aren't the best men, Lord, but have pity on us." He actually got more specific: "Victor Segovia knows that he drinks too much. Victor Zamora is too quick to anger. Pedro Cortez thinks about the poor father he's been to his young daughter …"

Nobody objected. It was the beginning of something special. In the deep down dark, buried under the earth, with death staring them in the face, the men got real before God and each other. They met every day to eat a meager meal, hear a short sermon, and then get on their knees and pray: "God, forgive me for the violence of my voice before my wife and my son." Or "God, forgive me for abusing the temple of my body with drugs." They confessed to each other too: "I'm sorry I raised my voice." Or "I'm sorry I didn't help get the water."

Meanwhile, above the surface a rescue effort had begun. People from all over the world began trying to help, or give, or pray for the men to be saved.

Unfortunately, the happiest part of the story is also the saddest. The drill cuts a narrow hole through the rock. The miners get food and supplies and iPads; they know that eventually they'll be rescued; they find out they're becoming famous and they might get rich. And then the confessing stops. The praying stops. The lure of money and fame undoes the transformative community that had developed in their shared suffering.

They were at their best when life was at its worst. "The Deep Down Dark" is the place where you know you can't make it on your own. "The Deep Down Dark" is the place where you realize you need God.

Possible Preaching Angles: Christmas; Christ, birth of—To use this as a Christmas illustration say something like, "God knew we all have Deep Down Dark places. He knew we could not make it on our own. He knew we could not find our way up to him. So he came down to us at Christmas …

A classic example of an almost-conversion to Christ happened to Lord Kenneth Clark, one of Great Britain's most prominent art historians and authors, and the producer of the BBC television series Civilization. In an autobiographical account, Clark writes that when he was living in a villa in France he had a curious episode.

I had a religious experience. It took place in the church of San Lorenzo, but did not seem to be connected with the harmonious beauty of the architecture. I can only say that for a few minutes, my whole being was radiated by a kind of heavenly joy, far more intense than anything I had ever experienced before. This state of mind lasted for several minutes … but wonderful as it was, [it] posed an awkward problem in terms of action. My life was far from blameless. I would have to reform. My family would think I was going mad, and perhaps after all, it was a delusion, for I was in every way unworthy of such a flood of grace. Gradually the effect wore off and I made no effort to retain it. I think I was right. I was too deeply embedded in the world to change course. But I had "felt the finger of God" quite sure and, although the memory of this experience has faded, it still helps me to understand the joys of the saints.

Where's Susan? That's the innocent question Joshua Rogers's daughter asked as they were reading The Last Battle, the final book in The Chronicles of Narnia, by C. S. Lewis. Susan is the child queen who helped her siblings save Narnia from the White Witch in The Lion, the Witch, and the Wardrobe. However, she is conspicuously absent from an early scene in The Last Battle that includes every character who traveled to Narnia as a child. Rogers writes:

"Daddy, where is she?" my daughter asked again.

"We'll see," I said, with a tinge of sadness.

Although I've read The Chronicles of Narnia dozens of times since I was a boy, Susan's tragic end gets me every time. The book eventually reveals that Susan grows up and outgrows her love for Narnia. We get few details about her until the end of the book, when High King Peter responds to an inquiry into his sister's whereabouts.

"My sister Susan," answered Peter shortly and gravely, "is no longer a friend of Narnia."

"Yes," said Eustace, "and whenever you've tried to get her to come and talk about Narnia or do anything about Narnia, she says, 'What wonderful memories you have! Fancy your still thinking about all those funny games we used to play when we were children.'"

Susan thought she had become too grown up for thoughts of a great king like Aslan and a blessed land like Narnia and, though she had once experienced it, she left it behind.

Based on data from the online grocer FreshDirect, many customers fail to keep their New Year's Resolutions. The retailer reported that customers' liquor and wine consumption picked up by about 40 percent in the first two weeks of February—while juice-cleanse sales dropped by 25 percent. Shoppers also bought 15 percent more ice cream and desserts, and 35 percent more pizza, in early February than during the first two weeks of January.

A study by Foursquare and Swarm shows that February 4th (37 days after New Year's) is the day people are most likely to fall off the wagon. The apps analyzed users' check-ins and found that date marks an uptick in visits to fast-food joints and a downturn in trips to the gym.

In his book The Big Picture, physicist Sean Carroll lays out his vision for what he calls "poetic naturalism"—a view of the world that has no use for a personal God. In the final chapter of the book, Carroll gets personal and writes about his religious upbringing. He confesses, "I loved the mysteries and the doctrine. Going to Sunday school, reading the Bible, trying to figure out what it was all about." But when his grandmother died unexpectedly when he was ten, the pain shook him. He became a more casual believer. Eventually, as he attended college and became an astronomy major, he lost his faith completely.

Interestingly, Carroll says that while his slide from faith to unbelief was gradual, there were two moments that stuck out. The first took place as a young boy. His local Episcopal church made a decision to change small parts of their service. The previous version had too much standing and kneeling, without enough breaks to sit down. So they reduced the up-and-down activity. That confounded the young Carroll who later wrote: "I found this to be scandalously heretical. How is it possible that we can just mess around with what happens in the service? Isn't all that decided by God? You mean to tell me that people can just change things around at a whim? I was still a believer, but doubts had been sown."

The second incident occurred when Carroll heard the song, "The Only Way" from the Emerson, Lake, & Palmer album Tarkus. The song included something Carroll had never heard before: "an unmistakable, in-your-face atheist message." It made him think, for the first time, that it was okay to be a nonbeliever—that it wasn't something he should be ashamed of or keep hidden.

Possible Preaching Angles: Atheism; Unbelief; Doubt; Hardness of heart; Rebellion; Apologetics. In commenting on Carroll's story of unbelief, Christian philosopher Brandon Vogt comments, "What strikes me about these two events, the most notable experiences in Carroll's journey from God to atheism, is how surprisingly shallow they are. I find it hard to believe that a couple of minor liturgical changes and the lyrics to a progressive rock song were enough to decimate a young man's faith. If that's truly what happened, and I don't doubt it did, then he must have had a very shallow and unsophisticated understanding of God. And he doesn't seem to have moved past it."

Jonathan Sacks, the former Chief Rabbi of Great Britain, once referenced what he called the "counter-intuitive phenomena of Jewish history"—a phenomena that applies to Christians as well. "When it was hard to be a Jew," Sacks wrote, "people stayed Jewish. When it was easy to be a Jew, people stopped being Jewish. Globally, this is the major Jewish problem of our time."