Church, Bride of Christ

There was no question he loved her. He was absolutely bedazzled by her. Surprising, really, because she was plain, maybe even… well, (to someone else perhaps) disappointing. But then, he himself was a poor man who didn’t have even two coins to rub together. He wasn’t especially handsome, either. But he was good… a good and godly man, and he swept her off her feet, and won her heart. What makes that ordinary story extraordinary is the rest of the story.

The story—told by Soren Kierkegaard —actually begins, “Suppose there was a king who loved a humble maiden.” He was a great king and he could have whatever he wanted. Every statesman feared his wrath, every foreign state trembled before his power; they would have all sent ambassadors to the wedding.

He realized that if he asked his courtiers they would say, “Your majesty is about to confer a favor upon the maiden for which she can never be sufficiently grateful her whole life long.” That was the problem! Even if she wanted to come with him, he would never know for certain if she would have loved him for himself. So he wrestled with his troubled thoughts alone.

Finally, he decided. If she could not come up to his high station and be sure to love him freely, he must descend to hers. And he must descend stripped of his royal power and wealth, for only then would he know if his beloved loved him freely, as equals. So he laid aside all his power and privileges, and came to her as her equal, to win her love.

As a mental health counselor and dating consultant, Samantha Burns knows a thing or two about successful relationships. And this self-proclaimed "millennial love expert" stands by her advice to wear your wedding dress wherever and whenever you want. (Seriously!) "I've always been passionate about love and relationships," Burns told TODAY. "They are what bring us so much joy in this world." And for her, wearing that most-special dress every anniversary is what will keep the romance alive.

It all started on the night of her wedding when Burns said she couldn't accept the idea of wearing her favorite gown only once in her life. That's when she turned to her husband and declared she'd be donning her most-beloved article of clothing every year on their Aug. 10 anniversary.

"He thought I was joking when I first told him," she said. "When he surprised me with a trip for our first anniversary, I told him to make sure I'd be able to wear my dress to whatever we were doing. He laughed, but I brought the dress along with me." So on her first anniversary she word her wedding dress while hitting balls on the driving range. On her third anniversary she wore it on a sunset cruise on Boston Harbor. "It was a Wednesday night," she said, "so we had the dance floor to ourselves with live music—it felt like a mini-wedding all over again!"

Like most brides (and most grooms too!), Burns may discover she can't fit into her wedding clothes year after year. But Burns maintains that this isn't just about her wedding "dress-capades"; it's about couples cultivating their own traditions that make for a happy, everlasting union.

Possible preaching angles: 1) Love; Marriage; Romance; Valentine's Day - This illustration will encourage married couples to devise creative ways to remind themselves of their own love story. 2) Christ, love of; Church, bride of Christ;-Believers should also celebrate the memory of our affection for our Savior and how we entered a love relationship with Him.

When America went to war after Pearl Harbor, many couples married rapidly as men were drafted into the armed services. In a typical scenario, a young woman at the time, became engaged to her beau who subsequently shipped out with the Navy before they could have a wedding. They weren't able to marry until they had enough leave to come home. She and her mother planned the wedding down to the last detail. They even printed the wedding invitations, but the left the date off. They didn't know when the bridegroom would be able to make it, so they waited at the ready. Finally, after eighteen long months, a telegram came that said, "You should get the white dress you've been wanting." The groom was on his way. They wrote by hand and send off the invitations.

We know who our bridegroom is; we just don't know when he's going to appear.

Ever wonder how to spend a $1 billion on a wedding? Hint: include Jennifer Lopez. A couple in Moscow took [the] notion of a lavish wedding ceremony to a whole new level—and to add to the sticker shock, both the newly-married husband and wife are in their twenties.

Khadija Uzhakhova is a 20-year-old college student, and Said Gutseriev is a 28-year-old Russian elite and son of oil and media tycoon Mikhail Gutseriev, who is worth $6.2 billion. The wedding was held at Safisa, a luxury restaurant and banqueting venue that the couple transformed into a fairy-tale setting with walls of freshly-cut flowers and furniture sourced from Paris.

And forget buffet food. The 600 guests at this wedding were served sushi and feasted on a full European meal, which ended with the presentation of a cake taller than the couple. Elie Saab designed the bride's 28-pound custom gown, which is estimated to cost nearly $25,000. And as for entertainment at the ceremony, the couple enlisted Sting and Enrique Iglesias to warm up the stage for none other than Jennifer Lopez (yes, J. Lo!)—who put on a full show for the bride, groom and other lucky attendees.

Still not impressed? The wedding party traveled in a fleet of Rolls Royces, and guests of the ceremony left with their own elaborate jewelry boxes. An official price tag for the wedding isn't available, but Harper's Bazaar estimates it falls within the $1 billion range. We just hope there's a thank you letter to Dad in the mail.

Possible Preaching Angles: 1) This earthly wedding is extravagant, but it is nothing compared the wedding feast of Jesus and his bride the church. 2) The bride of Christ will share in the inheritance of Christ because of his great love for her. 3) The wealthy live in temporary extravagance but one day it will all quickly pass away if they are not rich toward God.

In 1876, a small Methodist church near the ocean in Swan Quarter, North Carolina was struck by a hurricane and damaged. It was restored, but another hurricane came and damaged it, and the town, again. The parishioners restored their place of worship once more, but enough was enough, so they searched for a safer location. They found some land, and offered the owner of the property a generous amount of money for it, but he refused.

Then came another hurricane, and again there was massive flooding, so massive that it lifted the church from its moorings, and sent it meandering downstream. The residents of the town tied ropes to it, hoping to keep it from floating away forever, but the current was too strong.

When the water receded, the building came to rest on that exact piece of ground which the parishioners had previously tried to buy. So they went to the owner and once again made an offer. He refused their money again. "But I'll give it to you," he said, "The Lord definitely wants this church on this lot."

The sign in front of the church, from that day forward, said, "The House God Moved."

An article in the Chicago Tribune by Chris Erskine began: "By any measure, the Pacific Crest Trail is a beastly thing, an angry anaconda that slithers up the entire length of California and all the way to Canada, some 2,650 rugged miles. That's approximately 6 million steps—some of them glorious, many of them merciless." Sounds like life, doesn't it? Countless rugged miles. More steps than you can count. Some glorious. Many merciless.

The Tribune article focused on the people who take it upon themselves to help the hikers on that grueling trail. They open their homes for the weary travelers and provide meals, mail service, and help. They're called "trail angels." The article said, "But along the way, mercy is at hand." "Trail angels"—that would be a good description of Christians interacting with others in the world.

The article focused on Donna Saufley and her husband who "set up tents and a trailer to handle the spring crush." She calls their home, "Hiker Heaven." According to the article, "She talks fondly about the payoffs of being a trail angel: witnessing the hikers' emerging humanity, their grit, their brio, and the inevitable baring of souls. Traveling the trail 'is humbling,' she says. 'I compare it to the peeling of an onion. You see people for what they are.'" Like the church.

She and her husband will host 1200 people in 2015 in their ordinary home. They don't take any money. She says, "I always say that it's a river of life that washes up to my shore." The article concludes: "[Donna Saufley] loves it when her sanctuary is filled with hikers. [She says,] 'The sounds of conversations mingling with music and laughter is divine to my ear.'"

Ekhlas Mohammed is a new bride, but one without a honeymoon. Why? She and her new husband live in Dhuluiya, a town on Iraq's edge that has been literally torn apart—half joining the region's ISIS jihadists, and the other fighting them. That didn't stop Mohammed from braving the war zone to marry her husband, a tribal soldier on the other side of the line (battling ISIS).

The New York Times reported, "Ms. Mohammed put on a white dress and crossed the river, meeting Mr. Amer at a hair salon in Balad. They had pictures taken in a studio, and then took a boat home for a meal with his family. Most of her family did not attend because of the difficulty of crossing the battle lines, and there was no music because Mr. Amer was still grieving for his cousin, who had been buried near the house. Ms. Mohammed was still pleased. 'It was the most beautiful day of my life,' she said, 'and I'm very happy to have Ali beside me.'"

Possible Preaching Angle:

It's a powerful image that calls up pictures of the church—Christ's bride, torn between celebration of our great joy, and the reality that we still find ourselves in a war zone, a fallen and broken world. May peace and joy come to the new couple, as we know it will come to us.

Katelyn Beaty wrote a creative, semi-humorous, but deeply moving piece titled, "An Open Apology to the Local Church." Beaty's letter isn't a letter to defend the church.

Beaty writes: ‘I'm writing to apologize. While claiming publicly to have loved you as Christ does—like a spouse—in spirit I have loved you like an on-again, off-again fling. My faithful attendance suggests a radical commitment to gathering with your people. But many Sundays, my heart is still in it for me. By now you have likely received word of a popular blogger confessing his boredom with your recent Protestant iterations. And while I think the blogger is ultimately misguided about his relationship (or lack thereof) with you, I can appreciate his honesty. At least he's not leading you on. Here's where I need to confess my true feelings about you, Church: The romance of our earlier days has faded. The longer I have known you, the more I weary of your quirks and trying character traits…. While we're at it, let me make one more confession: I resent how much you want to go out these days.’

Editor’s Note: Read the whole thing. It's a wonderful, quotable illustration about the church.

Imagine this scenario: A man invites a friend into his home for dinner. They enjoy a delicious meal that the man's wife has graciously offered to make. The man and his friend casually catch up on life, but then halfway through the meal, the invited guest starts do to something unbelievable. He starts listing things that his friend's wife could have done better.

"The chicken was way too tough," he says. "You should have marinated it longer. And the broccoli is overcooked, mushy and bland. My 12-year-old daughter could cook a better meal. And you should really do something else with your hair." Then he starts to criticize her character, even ridicule her.

I'm guessing his visit would be cut short. And the guest would probably get sent away with a few choice words. Even if he was right about certain things, the typical husband simply wouldn't tolerate someone openly and caustically criticizing his wife. He loves her, and for a husband that leads to accepting and honoring his wife despite her quirks and shortcomings.

Unfortunately we tolerate this mean-spirited criticism all the time when it's directed at the church. If we're not careful, it's easy for us to look at the church and her leaders, and say, "The church should have done ____." Or, "I wish they hadn't ____." You fill in the blanks.

At one point in his journey towards Christ, Nathan Foster (the son of author Richard Foster) was living "a ragged attempt at discipleship." He was afraid to share his honest thoughts about God and his disillusionment with the church, especially with a father who had given his life to serve God and the church.

But one day as Nathan shared a ride with his dad on a ski lift, he blurted out, "I hate going to church. It's nothing against God; I just don't see the point." Richard Foster quietly said, "Sadly, many churches today are simply organized ways of keeping people from God."

Surprised by his dad's response, Nathan launched into "a well-rehearsed, cynical rant" about the church:

Okay, so since Jesus paid such great attention to the poor and disenfranchised, why isn't the church the world's epicenter for racial, social and economic justice? I've found more grace and love in worn-out folks at the local bar than those in the pew … . And instead of allowing our pastors to be real human beings with real problems, we prefer some sort of overworked rock stars.

His dad smiled and said, "Good questions, Nate. Overworked rock stars: that's funny. You've obviously put some thought into this." Once again, Nathan was surprised that his "rant" didn't faze his dad. "He didn't blow me off or put me down." From that point on Nathan actually looked forward to conversations with his dad.

It also proved to be a turning point in his spiritual life. By the end of the winter, Nathan was willing to admit,

Somewhere amid the wind and snow of the Continental Divide, I decided that if I'm not willing to be an agent of change [in the church], my critique is a waste … . Regardless of how it is defined, I was learning that the church was simply a collection of broken people recklessly loved by God … . Jesus said he came for the sick, not the healthy, and certainly our churches reflect that.

Spurred on by his father's acceptance and honesty and by his own spiritual growth, Nathan has continued to ask honest questions, but he has also started to love and change the church, rather than just criticize it.

In his autobiography, Be Myself, Warren Wiersbe writes about his first church building project as a young pastor in Indiana. He and the church's building committee were working with a church architect named Frank Schutt. At one of the committee meetings, Wiersbe says he learned a good lesson about architecture and theology, something he hadn't been taught at seminary.

In the meeting he asked Mr. Schutt, "Why do we need such an expensive, high ceiling in the auditorium? We're not building a cathedral. Why not just build an auditorium with a flat room and then put a church façade in the front of the building?" Wiersbe writes that in a very quiet voice, Mr. Schutt replied, "Pastor, the building you construct reflects what a church is and what a church does. You don't use façades on churches to fool people. That's for carnival sideshows. The outside and the inside must agree."

In his book The Pleasures of God, John Piper shares why God's love is superior to any love we will find here on earth:

Sometimes we joke and say about marriage, "The honeymoon is over." But that's because we are finite. We can't sustain a honeymoon level of intensity and affection. We can't foresee the irritations that come with long-term familiarity. We can't stay as fit and handsome as we were then. We can't come up with enough new things to keep the relationship that fresh. But God says his joy over his people is like a bridegroom over a bride. He is talking about honeymoon intensity and honeymoon pleasures and honeymoon energy and excitement and enthusiasm and enjoyment. He is trying to get into our hearts what he means when he says he rejoices over us with all his heart.

And add to this, that with God the honeymoon never ends. He is infinite in power and wisdom and creativity and love. And so he has no trouble sustaining a honeymoon level of intensity; he can foresee all the future quirks of our personality and has decided he will keep what's good for us and change what isn't; he will always be as handsome as he ever was, and will see to it that we get more and more beautiful forever; and he infinitely creative to think of new things to do together so that there will be no boredom for the next trillion ages of millenniums.

Joni Eareckson Tada, who was paralyzed in a diving accident as a teenager, draws parallels between her wedding day, and Christ's love for his church.

I felt awkward as my girlfriends strained to shift my paralyzed body into a cumbersome wedding gown. No amount of corseting and binding my body gave me a perfect shape. The dress just didn't fit well. Then, as I was wheeling into the church, I glanced down and noticed that I'd accidentally run over the hem of my dress, leaving a greasy tire mark. My paralyzed hands couldn't hold the bouquet of daisies that lay off-center on my lap. And my chair, though decorated for the wedding, was still a big, clunky gray machine with belts, gears, and ball bearings. I certainly didn't feel like the picture-perfect bride in a bridal magazine.

I inched my chair closer to the last pew to catch a glimpse of Ken in front. There he was, standing tall and stately in his formal attire. I saw him looking for me, craning his neck to look up the aisle. My face flushed, and I suddenly couldn't wait to be with him. I had seen my beloved. The love in Ken's face had washed away all my feelings of unworthiness. I was his pure and perfect bride.

How easy it is for us to think that we're utterly unlovely—especially to someone as lovely as Christ. But he loves us with the bright eyes of a Bridegroom's love and cannot wait for the day we are united with him forever.

There were two important steps to a Jewish marriage: the betrothal (the promised agreement to marry) and the actual wedding ceremony. These two events were often separated by an extended period of time during which the couple remained faithful to one another though the wedding ceremony was not yet finalized.

Our betrothal to Christ takes place at the point of salvation. But the wedding ceremony occurs when Christ, the Bridegroom, comes to take his bride.

As marriage is a metaphor for the church, so the church is a metaphor for marriage. The church has a unity we are to preserve. The church has a diversity we are to value. The church has a selfless task in which, together, we are to engage. This is marriage.

The Lord honored marriage by selecting it as a favored metaphor for his relationship with us, the church. We are his bride, loved and nurtured.

The Church of God apart from the Person of Christ is a useless structure. However ornate it may be in its organization, however perfect in all its arrangements, however rich and increased with goods, if the Church is not revealing the Person, lifting Him to the height where all men can see Him, then the Church becomes an impertinence and a sham, a blasphemy and a fraud, and the sooner the world is rid of it, the better.