Elderly

The next time you find yourself rotting in bed or going through the motions of another boring day, think about your older self. This is what TikTok creator @sonyatrachsel does when she’s in a funk. She’ll have what she calls a “time traveling day,” and it’s an outlook that’s resonating on the app.

On a time traveling day, Sonya will pretend that her 80-year-old self gets to come back to this exact moment and relive it. “You have to get real with it,” she said. “Close your eyes, imagine yourself sitting in your mansion on a chair, and then poof — you’re here today.”

There are so many reasons why Sonya’s “time traveling” trend has struck a chord. For one, it might make you emotional to think about your older self getting the chance to come back to a younger body for a day, kind of like a second chance.

This is a really beautiful way to frame your thoughts, practice gratitude, and think about what you would do if you had youth on your side again. Would you ride a bike? Go for a walk? Learn something new? Would you linger longer in the park and stare at the flowers? Be more adventurous?

Even mundane moments, like waiting in line, can become more meaningful when you think about how excited your 80-year-old self would be to come back to do it all over again. “It just becomes part of the experience,” she said.

This sweet and thoughtful approach to living can help you notice and appreciate the little things around you, but it can also inspire you to do more, live more, and have more fun. So, get up, get out there, and give your 80-year-old self a story to tell.

In her comments, someone wrote, “You just changed my life.” Another said, “This is genius! Don’t take your youth for granted.” “Thank you,” one commenter wrote under the video. “When I read this, I got up out of bed so fast.”

The New York Time’s ethicist received the following from an anonymous reader:

I have an 85-year-old neighbor who is a sweet friend and caring person. My issue is that she is very religious and I’m not at all. She prays for me and says it in person, texts, and emails for even the most minor of situations. I’ve told her my view of religion and that she doesn’t need to pray for me. She said she has to, otherwise she’s not following the Bible. I’m trying to ignore this but it’s really bothering me that she can’t respect my wishes.

“The Ethicist” responded:

I’m glad that you’ve been honest with each other about your very different views concerning prayer. But… if you don’t think these prayers will do you any good, you presumably also don’t think they’ll do you any harm. By contrast, she thinks that you’ll be worse off without them, and that praying for you is her duty.

The only reason you give for objecting to her prayers is that she has failed to comply with your wishes. Yet I don’t find that she has thereby treated you with disrespect… So, you’re not entitled to insist that she stop including you in her prayers. What you can fairly ask is simply that she refrain from informing you about them. Still, instead of requiring that your octogenarian neighbor change her ways, I wonder whether you might change yours — and learn to accept this woman for who she is, hearing her prayers as a sincere expression of her loving feelings toward you.

Max Evans-Browning, a five-year-old from Wales, captured hearts worldwide by creating a touching tribute to Sir David Attenborough’s 99th birthday. Max spent four days drawing 99 animals — one for each year of the renowned naturalist’s life — demonstrating his admiration and artistic dedication.

Max’s project spanned eight A3 sheets, and his parents proudly shared, “He’s a huge fan of Sir David and wanted to do something special to celebrate his birthday.” The child’s detailed and colorful drawings include a wide variety of animals, from familiar pets to exotic wildlife, showcasing his keen interest in nature at a young age.

Attenborough himself has been a source of inspiration for many generations, and Max’s artistic gift is a heartfelt homage to the man whose documentaries have shaped public understanding of the natural world. Max’s mother said, “It’s amazing to see such creativity and enthusiasm in a child so young.”

The tribute also highlights the power of youthful curiosity and creativity in fostering a connection with nature and science. Max’s drawings not only celebrate a milestone birthday but also encourage others to appreciate the diversity of life on Earth.

Local media praised Max’s efforts as “a wonderful example of how children can be inspired by science and nature.” The story has resonated globally, reminding people of all ages to cherish the natural world and those who dedicate their lives to protecting it.

Possible Preaching Angle:

Like Max’s art honors Attenborough and creation, our worship honors God through our gifts and love for what He made.

In her book, Aging Faithfully, Alice Fryling writes about what she learned from insomnia:

Sleep has always been difficult for me, but about the time I turned sixty, insomnia came banging at my door. I lay awake every night for hours. Sometimes in anxiety, sometimes in boredom. I prayed every night that God would help me sleep. That didn't work. It only made my insomnia worse because then I would lie awake trying to solve the theological issues around unanswered prayer.

One tired morning as I sat in quiet, I began to wonder why God created us to sleep in the first place. If I were God, I would want people to stay awake to help take care of the world. But for about eight hours out of every twenty-four, God designed us to be asleep.

I realized that when I sleep, I am out of control. When I experience insomnia, I am also out of control. I certainly cannot make myself go to sleep. Perhaps insomnia and sleep accomplish the same purpose. In other words, insomnia was a reminder, like sleep, that we do not control our own lives, let alone the world. God is our Creator and is the one in charge.

My ‘theology of sleep’ is my own personal reminder that God is God and I am not. God is in control of my life, my waking and sleeping hours, in loving, creative, grace-filled ways. Apparently, my being out of control is part of God's design.

The number of Americans living to at least 100 is expected to quadruple over the next 30 years, to about 422,000 by the mid-2050’s, according to the Pew Research Center. Laura Carstensen, founding director of Stanford University’s Center on Longevity, says research has made surprising discoveries about the way older people view their lives. With fewer “what-ifs,” they appear to gain more clarity on their place in the world. She added “…changes will be needed to make the most of those added years.”

Most people believe that growing older is associated with loneliness, depression, anxiety, and that mental health suffers. The very good news is, it looks like people do better emotionally as they get older. This has been so surprising to researchers and to the general public that it’s probably been the most scrutinized finding about aging.

A lot goes wrong as we get older. There are physical problems, loss of loved ones, and age discrimination. There’s a lot that isn’t good about growing older, but people seem to do better emotionally. Older people have shorter time horizons. For many years, people thought that must make people miserable and scared. The interesting thing is there’s a paradox. It actually makes people feel calmer not to have to prepare for this long and nebulous future, and to be able to live more in the present.

Younger people are almost always thinking about the future. They almost always have one foot out the door, whatever they’re doing. And older people seem to do better just being able to be in the present and enjoy the moment. I think that is because they don’t have to keep planning. As people get older it’s clearer where they stand in the world and what they’re good at. And older people tend to look at the positive in life.

It doesn’t appear to be good for individuals or societies to have a large group of people kind of sit it out for 30 years. What we need to do is rethink how we live our lives from the beginning all the way through, in order to optimize these longer lives.

Possible Preaching Angle:

If you retire at age 65 or even 70 but live to be 100, what are you going to do for the Lord in those last 30 plus years? Are you really going to just sit in church for all those years? What does the Lord want you to do?

The longevity business is booming. People are flocking to longevity meetings and taking compounds they hope will extend their lives. Investors are backing scientists researching techniques to reprogram cells to a younger state. Longevity influencers argue that if they can live long enough, scientific breakthroughs will keep them going indefinitely. “We are going to start to understand how to rejuvenate and revitalize ourselves. This is what science does,” said Dr. Peter Diamandis, a 63-year-old entrepreneur who runs longevity trips for investors.

But S. Jay Olshansky, who studies the upper bounds of human longevity at the University of Illinois Chicago, believes people shouldn’t expect to live to 100. He contends most will reach between 65-90. Olshansky said, “It’s basic biology. As people grow older, their cells and tissues accumulate damage. Breakdowns of one kind or another happen more frequently and get increasingly difficult to repair.”

Nobel laureate Venki Ramakrishnan explained the many reasons in his book, Why We Die. He doesn’t believe current interventions will dramatically extend lifespan. Techniques to reverse aging would have to help every system in the body, including the brain, over a long period.

Trinity Evangelical Divinty School professor Kevin Vanhoozer writes about caring for his aging mother in an issue of CT magazine:

For nine years now, I have been watching my mother’s identity slowly fade as memories and capacities switch off, one after another, like lights of a house shutting down for the night. Marriage may be a school of sanctification, as Luther said, but caring for aging parents is its grad school, especially when he or she lives with you and suffers from dementia.

It’s been said that as we become older, we become caricatures of ourselves. Dementia speeds the process. It’s easy to see why: With loss of executive cognitive functioning, we’re less prone to monitor what we say and do. We begin to fly on auto-pilot, re-tracing again and again well-trod paths.

What lies under … the social masks we have carefully constructed? What lies under my mother’s happy face? (“I’m fine,” she’d say, even after a fall). I recently discovered the answer.

Years into the dementia, she lost her last line of defense and began to voice her inmost thoughts aloud. “Father, don’t let me fall” accompanied her every shuffling step behind her walker. Initially I thought this terribly sad—clearly, she wasn’t fine but anxious—yet I eventually found it comforting. The Bible depicts life as a walk: Shouldn’t we all be praying to the Lord to help us avoid missteps? Though she had forgotten former friends and neighbors, and large swaths of her own life, she remembered the fatherhood of God.

An article in The New York Times explored the following scenario. Perhaps this routine sounds familiar: You wake up, look in the mirror and scrutinize the dark, hollowed-out skin underneath your eyes. You look exhausted, despite having slept well. And maybe you look older than you are, too.

According to the article, “Dark circles are one of the most common skin complaints … Some skin care products can offer some benefits, but they may not live up to their brightening claims.” The article concluded that most solutions for dark circles under our eyes aren’t really solutions.

Eye creams and serums that claim to improve dark circles can be expensive. And most haven’t undergone any real intensive lab or clinical testing, so they’re often ineffective. Because dark circles can have various causes—there is not always a one-size-fits-all solution for getting rid of them.

But the best part of the article is tucked away in the reader comments section. Two women offered perhaps the best solution on the market—acceptance. Here’s what Clare from DC wrote: “I'm 92. Nobody looks at me anyway. Just be glad you can open those eyes every morning.” Then TheraP from the Midwest wrote: “Maybe we need to just accept the aging process with a certain humility and a bit of good humor.”

The first thing to know about people who shun retirement to work past age 80 is that they are probably busier, and possibly cooler, than you.

One said an interview would have to wait because he was traveling to France for the 24 Hours of Le Mans. Another said he would be free after hitting a research deadline and organizing his Harvard Business School class’s 65th reunion. A third, available on shorter notice, emailed a physical description before meeting: “In the spirit of YOLO, I have blue hair and tattoos.”

Growing numbers of 80-somethings are deciding that if days are finite, they are better spent on the job than in retirement. Harrison Ford, 80, released his latest Indiana Jones movie, Jane Goodall, 89, is still protecting chimps, Smokey Robinson, 83, is still touring.

Roughly 650,000 Americans over 80 were working last year, that’s about 18% more than a decade earlier. Some people have been pressed back into duty by inflation and stock-market volatility. Many cite a simpler reason to keep working—they just want to. These workers joke about getting bored on the golf course or being pushed out of the house by a spouse who won’t tolerate idleness. Beneath the wisecracks is a sense of purpose that refuses to fade. They just can’t quit their careers.

Possible Preaching Angles:

As a positive illustration this shows that retirement can still be a fruitful time of life. As a negative illustration this could show how people’s identities and worth are still wrapped up in work.

According to a new poll, more Americans over the age of 50 are using cannabis now than before the COVID-19 pandemic. Among a sample of over 2,000 older adults (ages 50-80), 12% said they had consumed a product containing THC within the past year and 4% reported doing so multiple times per week.

Study leader and addiction psychologist Anne Fernandez, Ph.D. said,

As the stress of the pandemic and the increased legalization of cannabis converged, our findings suggest cannabis use increased among older adults nationally. Older adults represent a vulnerable age group for cannabis use due to interactions with medications, risky driving, cannabis-related mental health impacts, and increased possibility of falls and memory issues.

The 12% using cannabis in 2023 is notably higher than the 9.5% in 2019, and much higher than the 3% reported in a 2006 study. Back then, only 12 U.S. states had legalized medical cannabis laws. The National Poll on Healthy Aging reported in 2017 that 6% of older adults were using cannabis for medical purposes.

Those who were also unemployed, older adults who said they were unmarried and had no partner, and those who said they drank alcohol, were more likely to use marijuana. Dr. Fernandez notes an especially concerning finding: People with alcohol use high enough to potentially cause physical and psychological harm were close to eight times as likely to use cannabis in the past year.

This group of dual-substance users is one that doctors and public health officials need to pay special attention to. Dr. Fernandez explains, “Other research has shown that using both alcohol and cannabis increases the chance that a person will drive while impaired. They are also more likely to have physical and mental health issues, including substance use disorders.”

It had cluttered up Jack Harris's dining table for almost eight years. Nevertheless, the 86-year-old was determined to finish his five-foot long, 5,000-piece jigsaw. And when he thought the painstaking process was complete, he stood back to admire his work, only to find one piece was missing. Mr. Harris has searched his home for the missing piece but his family fears one of their two dogs has swallowed it.

They have even asked the puzzle's manufacturer if they could provide a spare, but Mr. Harris has taken so long to complete the jigsaw that Falcon Games has stopped making it.

His daughter-in-law, Eve Harris, who gave him the jigsaw as a Christmas present, said she thought it would be a challenge for the retired businessman. Mr. Harris is given a new jigsaw every year, and usually finishes them by spring. But this puzzle was to prove different.

He said he started the jigsaw, which shows the 19th century oil painting The Return of The Prodigal Son by James Tissot, as usual. But eight years later he was still struggling to finish it.

Eve said,

We got him this one as a bit of a joke really, because he always boasted he could get them done so quickly, he's a bit of a whiz with them. It was marvelous to see it finally completed. But when we saw there was a piece missing from the middle, we just couldn't believe it. He was just so disappointed when he found one bit was missing. It's sad really because now it will never be completed.

Possible Preaching Angles:

There are at least three possible ways to use this illustration: 1) Maybe as a wince-inducing look at disappointment in life. 2) Maybe the whole "building a life yet there's a God-shaped hole" sort of thing. 3) Maybe even as a metaphor for Body life (every part is important).

Brookdale Senior Living is one of the industry's leading providers of senior adult care, with over 600 facilities across the United States. But employees have been complaining that the chain’s centralized computer system, which prioritizes efficiency, misses some of the nuance involving caring for seniors. As a result, they say, its staffing algorithms consistently understaff facilities, and the quality of care suffers.

Patricia McNeal spent six years overseeing facilities in Ohio and Florida, but was forced out after complaining to her superiors about the substandard staffing recommendations. She said, “Brookdale is handing you this thing that says, ‘This is what it says you need, hire for that.’ My eyes told me that we weren’t getting enough.”

And she’s not alone. At a facility in Florida, Brookdale recommended fewer employees than buildings on campus, making it impossible for staff to always monitor all residents. And at a facility in Texas, caregivers were given only 20 minutes to help residents undress, shower, and get dressed again, a standard they could not meet.

According to a report in The Washington Post, the problem stems from decades old research bankrolled by corporate executives looking to cut costs and maximize revenue. They timed a set of caregivers performing various tasks, then fed that data into their programming, erroneously assuming that all adults have the same needs and that those trends would never evolve over time. What resulted is a standard of low-skilled laborers performing rote tasks, treating human beings like widgets on an assembly line.

This labor model fails to account for the complexities of dealing with adults who may be facing cognitive decline. When any one task takes longer than anticipated, it subtracts time from the entire pool of available hours, which prevents some residents from receiving essential care.

In an email to her superiors, Brenda Jarmer, a director of operations in Florida, pleaded for intervention, “I cannot stress to you how bad it is … I am asking for help.”

Possible Preaching Angle:

Being a wise steward of resources is important, but we should never be so concerned with efficiency and conformity that we fail to care for the weakest among us.

We may not want to admit it but author Arthur Brooks is convincing when he writes to the effect that age-related decline will come much sooner than we think. We might make excuses for ourselves but our recall of names and places is not what it used to be. He writes:

By the time you are fifty your brain is as crowded with information as the New York Public Library. Meanwhile, your personal research librarian is creaky, slow, and easily distracted. When you send him to get some information you need—say, someone’s name—he takes a minute to stand up, stops for coffee, talks to an old friend in the periodicals, and then forgets where he was going in the first place. Meanwhile, you are kicking yourself for forgetting something you have known for years. When the librarian finally shows back up and says, “That guy’s name is Mike,” Mike is long gone and you are doing something else.

During Braylon Edwards’ career playing receiver in college and the NFL, he lived with a heightened sense of spatial awareness and kinetic readiness. You can’t spend years running routes at full speed, maintaining readiness to catch a football in midair while equally skilled and muscular men are ready to assault you with their bodies, and not develop the ability to react in real-time.

But on one Friday morning, Edwards’ skills weren’t just useful for avoiding harm, but also for preventing it from happening to others. When he entered a local YMCA, Edwards witnessed a 20-year-old young man assaulting an elderly gentleman around sixty years his senior.

Edwards said, “I walked into the locker after working out, I heard a noise about four rows behind me.” The dispute, according to Edwards, appeared to be over the playing of music, and he wasn’t initially concerned. But then things escalated, and that’s when he stepped in. “You start to hear some pushing and shoving, and you know what fighting sounds like … once I heard a ‘thud,’ that’s what got me up.”

Edwards quickly subdued the young man and held him securely until authorities arrived on the scene. The victim, unidentified in official accounts, was admitted to a local hospital and reported to be in stable condition.

When confronted with the possibility that this man might have died if he hadn’t intervened, Edwards revealed that the love for his own family propelled him to protect someone else in their later years. “At the end of that day, that’s just what you do … my mom, my grandma, my father … in that moment, these are the people you think about.”

Police Chief Jeff King said in a statement, “As evidenced by the significant injuries inflicted on the victim, it is clear that Mr. Braylon Edwards’ intervention played a pivotal role in saving the victim’s life. This is a horrific incident, but the selfless efforts made by Mr. Edwards embody the best in our society.”

Possible Preaching Angle:

God is glorified when we use our gifts to show love to others in need, especially the weak, the vulnerable, the poor, or the sick—these are the people whom Jesus regularly sought out for rescue and deliverance.

“Now that you are retired, it’s time to play pickleball all day, every day.”

That’s the message from the front of a retirement card. It reflects the growing popularity of pickleball in the United States, especially among older adults. According to the Sports & Fitness Industry Association, pickleball is the fastest-growing sport in the country. An article in TIME observes, “More than half (52%) of core [pickleball] players—those who play eight or more times a year—are 55 or older, and almost a third (32.7%) are 65-plus.”

If playing pickleball all day, every day isn’t your cup of tea, perhaps you’d rather have the poster that proclaims, “Retirement To Do List . . . Play Golf.”

Both the card and the poster bear witness to the popular view that retirement is mainly a time to play. For some, it’s pickleball or golf. For others, it’s cribbage or Wordle. For many retirees, travel is a delightful form of play, as is hanging out with friends or grandchildren. No matter the form it takes, play can be seen as the main point of retirement. “You worked hard for decades,” or so the story goes, “now it’s your turn to play.”

But, I wonder, is this a good way to think about retirement? If we want to flourish in this third of life—to live fully, fruitfully, and faithfully—where should play fit into our lives? Can play help us flourish? Or might it actually get in the way?

In 2021, Rayner Conway was downsizing her four-story, 3,500-square-foot home to a condo less than half the size when her husband of 50 years died unexpectedly. The designer the couple had tasked with preparing the space, faced a fresh challenge. Could she devise a comfy home for her suddenly solo client—whom she calls “a firecracker”—while also making a tough transition not just bearable, but invigorating?

The article went on to explain how the designer had a strategy for "spotlighting meaningful artwork, weaving in treasured heirlooms and swathing the rooms in a bright palette designed to stand out, not hide away."

Conway said, “Many women of my generation look at [downsizing] as giving up their previous life, but I saw a new chapter. I’m 73. I can do whatever … I want.”

Possible Preaching Angle:

In sharp contrast, in the Kingdom of God, growing older or “retirement” doesn’t mean doing whatever I want. It’s an opportunity to serve God and others and leave a Christ-honoring legacy.

His pronouncements could hardly sound more drastic. In interviews and public appearances, Yusuke Narita, an assistant professor of economics at Yale, has taken on the question of how to deal with the burdens of Japan’s rapidly aging society.

During an interview in late 2012 he said, “I feel like the only solution is pretty clear. In the end, isn’t it mass suicide and mass ‘seppuku’ of the elderly?” Seppuku is an act of ritual disembowelment that was a code among dishonored samurai in the 19th century.

When asked by a school-age boy to elaborate on his mass seppuku theories, Dr. Narita graphically described to a group of assembled students a scene from “Midsommar.” This is a 2019 horror film in which a Swedish cult sends one of its oldest members to commit suicide by jumping off a cliff. Dr. Narita said, “Whether that’s a good thing or not, that’s a more difficult question to answer. So, if you think that’s good, then maybe you can work hard toward creating a society like that.”

At other times, he has broached the topic of euthanasia. He said in one interview, “The possibility of making it mandatory in the future … will come up in discussion.” Dr. Narita, 37, said that his statements had been “taken out of context,” and that he was mainly addressing a growing effort to push the most senior people out of leadership positions in business and politics—to make room for younger generations. Nevertheless, with his comments on euthanasia and social security, which appear clear enough, he has pushed the hottest button in Japan.

Possible Preaching Angle:

This is not a pleasant or positive illustration, but it does highlight the dangers of losing the biblical doctrine of the Imago Dei and the sanctity of every human life.

Garret Keizer was asked by his minister to visit an elderly parishioner, Pete, in a nursing home. Garret finds out that Pete loves bananas, so he starts bringing some on each week’s visit. Garrett said:

I was standing with my Chiquitas in line at the supermarket behind one of those people who seem to think they're at a bank instead of a store. She must have had three checkbooks. I shifted from one foot to the other, sighing, glancing at the clock. I wanted to catch Pete before supper. No doubt I was feeling the tiniest bit righteous because I was about the Lord's business on behalf of my old man, who needed his bananas and was looking forward to my company. And here was this loser buying an armful of trivial odds and ends and taking my precious time to screw around with her appallingly disorganized finances.

When I finally got through the line, I watched her walk to her vehicle feeling that same uncharitable impulse that makes us glance at the driver of a car we're passing just to “get a look at the jerk.” She got into the driver's seat of a van marked with the name of a local nursing home and filled to capacity with elderly men and women who had no doubt handed her their wish lists and checkbooks as soon as she'd cut the ignition.

In an issue of Christianity Today, Jen Wilkin writes of an unexpected lesson from Facebook:

Facebook decided to kick off (the new year) with a challenge: Compare your first profile picture to your most recent one to see how hard aging hit you over the past ten years.

I pulled up my first profile picture and stared at it, the air exiting my lungs and an odd numbness seeping up from my toes. Hello, fresh-faced person. I remember you. I remember that shirt, the wallpaper in that kitchen, that haircut. I also remember the night I uploaded you, lightheartedly filling in my Facebook profile with enough information for my identity to be stolen and my house to be robbed.

Imagine if it had been possible to post a picture of your heart (10 years ago), laid next to another (now). A spiritual angiogram, before and after, a trajectory of the growth or decline of wisdom itself. What would it show? Would you want to post it?

This is what I thought as I sat at my computer, contemplating the face of a younger self. I have not stopped thinking about it since. Who says social media can’t make you wise? Facebook invites us to count the lines on our faces, but wisdom reads between those lines.

A psychologist at New York University wondered if young adults were not saving money for the future because they felt like they were putting it away for a stranger. So, Hal Ersner-Hershfield conducted an experiment, giving some college students a real mirror and others virtual reality goggles where, with the help of special effects like those used in movies, they could see a future version of themselves at age 68 or 70.

Those who saw the older version of themselves in the virtual “mirror” were willing to put more than twice as much money into their retirement accounts as the students who spent time looking at their younger selves in a real mirror. What’s more, those who glimpsed their future selves were more likely to complete their studies on time, whereas those who didn’t were more likely to blow off their studies. Those who saw their future selves were also more likely to act ethically in business scenarios.

Possible Preaching Angle:

As followers of Jesus, when we catch a vision for who we might become in the future, we can begin to live as that person now. When we can imagine ourselves in both our temporal future and our eternal future, we can be inspired toward holiness in our day-to-day lives.