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Stop Telling Christian Singles What They Can't Do

Stop Telling Christian Singles What They Can't Do


Feb 14 2013
Celebrating the rich possibilities of chastity

However you invest yourself in them, non-romantic relationships — especially with those in different seasons of life — provide a good reminder that life entails much more than randy singlehood, and loneliness can be assuaged by more than a lover. Your singleness can help take others out of their seemingly endless, monotonous life stage, while providing you opportunities to serve and encourage them. After my grandfather had his first stroke, he needed a great deal of help transitioning into his new home routine. Because one of my brothers was single, he was able to fly up and provide essential support that blessed our entire extended family, not least of all the nearby relatives to whom he gave a brief respite from the burden of caring. Freedom to help like that is much rarer when your life is intimately intertwined with someone else's.

Live in community.

As much as I hope to be married someday I will really miss living with more than one adult. For most of the last six years, I've had the privilege of sharing a house with a rotating cast of others, most of whom have become dear friends. Though communal living unavoidably produces friction and conflict, in the best moments — usually an evening when we all wind up home at the same time, all in the kitchen — I want to hug myself with the joy at the laughter and various personality dynamics surrounding me. I always wanted community like this, but I didn't realize how often it requires living in such close proximity. As nice as it would be to someday "set up house" for my own family, I know I will greatly miss having housemates. Through the many memories we've shared, my housemates have given me one of the richest gifts of my adulthood.

Both of these suggestions pertain to relationships. This series on singleness will continue next week, when I'll discuss how abstinence frees us to explore and use our bodies.

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