Our church believes in planning with purpose. From my evaluation of our programming, it seems our two primary purposes are eating and talking. We even offer coffee and doughnuts at our morning services.
All these “eating meetings” sometimes make me wonder if perhaps we’re wasting God’s time. After all, we’re noshing, not praying or reaching the lost. I’m often tempted not to bother with meetings featuring “food, fun, and fellowship.”
So I went reluctantly to the latest invention of the women’s committee, a sort of “Chinese Chit-Chat,” since we’d be eating Chinese take-out and chattering over chopsticks. The menu included egg rolls, moo shu chicken, chow mein, and German chocolate cake (the Chinese having not discovered chocolate). Ever mindful of the Lord’s decree, “My house shall be called a house of prayer,” we blessed the meal.
After the chow mein chow-down, an ice-breaker game was introduced. We were to write a secret no one knew about us.
This stumped me. I’m described as “refreshingly transparent” by some, “discretion impaired” by others. All of my extraordinary experiences were well-known in this circle by now. I finally settled on revealing that I received my first kiss at the innocent age of 10. Surely, I had never disclosed this fascinating fact to my fellow churchgoers.
The notes went into a basket. When mine was chosen, the reader promptly pointed to me and said, “It’s Linda.” This from a relative newcomer. So much for a life of mystery and intrigue.
As the basket emptied, we discovered strange incidents and hilarious disasters. Almost last, we opened a slip of paper that read, “I have a 15-year-old daughter.”
It seemed one of our shyer members had decided to play it safe. But we gradually realized that many of us had daughters, but none who were 15. We asked the visitors, but no one owned up.
Finally, Anna, a faithful member for over five years, slowly raised a trembling hand. Anna? But we knew all about her-married, with no children because of health risks, we thought. Eyes widened, talking ceased.
Anna explained, “When I was a teenager, I had a baby girl. My parents are raising her, but they live far away, and I haven’t seen her for several years. But she still calls me ‘Mom.’
“I was embarrassed to tell this when I first came. Then I didn’t know how to tell it, when you already thought you knew me. I know God wants me to be more open and let you know the real me. Next Mother’s Day, I want to stand up with the other mothers.”
Silence. Tears. Then came embraces and soft words of reassurance and gratitude for her newfound trust in us.
Anna’s heart was finally free of a burdensome secret, all because we played a silly game at a frivolous event. God showed up anyway, along with the Chinese take-out.
Linda Riley is director of Called Together Ministries in Torrance, California. In this column, she reflects on the variety of people we meet in ministry.
1997 by Christianity Today/Leadership Journal.
