Why I Started, Why I Stopped

I first started because my best friend was trying marijuana. I’d always heard drugs were bad, but I was never able to equate the anti-drug commercials or the D.A.R.E. programs with the stuff we were smoking behind the grade school. After all, my friends were doing it and they were fine.

My parents did everything they knew how to do. I never blamed my actions on what they did or didn’t do. Instead of parents getting worked up about it, they should discuss it on a rational level and have their son or daughter look at someone they can relate to (a friend or peer) who is doing drugs. Then, discuss how doing drugs is affecting that person’s life:

Can’t concentrate in class.
Grades going down.
Attitude is really changing.
Has no motivation to do anything.

Why did I quit? I stopped when I finally came to terms with the fact that I could no longer live my life away from Christ. I always knew it was wrong, but I got so wrapped up in it that I didn’t want to quit. I had to ask God to give me the will to quit. I knew quitting was what he wanted me to do.

—Evan Hodge

Alcohol and drugs worked for me for years. But the fun was over long before I realized it. I was trying to chase the fun times, even after they were long gone. I couldn’t quite grasp that my life was unmanageable, even when I was sleeping in garages or cars, or when I was unemployable. I was “adaptable.” It took a long time for me to become hopeless, to give up and take direction.

I needed a God. I was always afraid of that great paradox—give up my life to get a life. “Thy will, not mine, be done” is a scary concept for a self-centered person.

Nothing worked until I reached the point of moral, spiritual, and emotional bankruptcy. Finally I gave up and became willing to follow directions and take action.

I’m an alcoholic before anything—before I’m a father, a son, an employee. But I’ve been able to stay sober and get somewhat of a life. It’s not money or material things. It’s on the inside, knowing I’m doing the right things and becoming trustworthy, being at peace with myself and even happy sometimes, and being of service to others.

—Todd Smoke