It’s Complicated

I recently visited Portland, Oregon, the city in which I spent the bulk of my twenties. As I reflected on those years I was struck by how much more complicated my life is now.

Back then life was pretty simple. It was just me. And taking care of me (at least to the level of my satisfaction) was pretty simple. I paid a measly $375 a month for my studio apartment, ate Taco Bell and 99-cent Whoppers (remember those?), and arranged my college classes so I could sleep in every morning.

How times have changed! It's no longer just me. I have a wife and two children. Cheap rent has been replaced by a mortgage, property taxes, and HOA fees. Instead of feasting on tacos and Whoppers, I choke down kale smoothies for lunch—then sneak out for Whoppers, which have quadrupled in price. Sleeping in is a thing of the past. Regardless of how late I stay up, I rise at the crack of dawn to rock a newborn or chase a rambunctious toddler. I've exchanged college and a weekend job with a career that involves traveling, writing, and speaking. Back when I lived in Portland, I lamented all the books I had to read for my classes. Now I find myself looking wistfully at the stacks of books I don't have time to read.

I'm not complaining (well, maybe a little) because I love my life. I feel more fulfilled and blessed than that lonely bachelor who lived in Portland. But my life now is busier, harder. I have more responsibilities, less free time. I juggle a host of competing priorities: career, family, health, church. And figuring out how to balance it all is, well, complicated.

I know you don't feel sorry for me, because I'm betting your life has had a similar trajectory. That's just how life works. It tends to get more and more complicated, especially for those of us in ministry. As we open our lives to the needs of others, the complexity only grows. Ministering effectively while caring for your family and personal life is no small feat.

Some people have obvious activities to chop. If you're surfing the web for four hours a day or spending your weekends in a casino, you know what needs to be done. But I'd wager most of us have more difficult decisions to make. Streamlining our schedules and keeping our sanity involves continually choosing the best from among the merely good.

In my interview with Bill Hybels from the Spring issue of Leadership, I asked him what changes he'd made to simplify his life. He talked about scheduling. "I know that sounds like such a boring subject," he said, "but sitting down before God with a calendar and a submitted spirit is one of the holiest things you can do."

That's good advice. I don't think following it will magically make our lives simple. If we wanted simple, we wouldn't have chosen ministry. But bringing our complicated lives before God and submitting every detail to his will—that's a pretty good place to start.

Drew Dyck Managing Editor