Sometimes at 3:00 A.M., I wake in the darkness and struggle to find my way back to a place of trust in God. In the stillness of that hour, my wants and worries are amplified. If I flip on the TV, the commercials airing in the dead of night offer a host of treatments promising to bring relief to harried insomniacs: bankruptcy lawyers who can fix financial woes, sleeping aids to silence restless minds, or whole life insurance policies to provide for families. (Oh, and lots of $19.95 kitschy cooking aids!)
I’m often awake in the middle of the night thanks to my midlife physiology. I remind myself that the words of Jesus are just as true at 3:00 A.M. as they are at 3:00 P.M., when the light of day and a busy schedule turn down the volume on the temporal worries that seem so permanent, so urgent in the darkness.
Jesus told his followers that they could trust his Father to provide just what they needed. Seeking to live under his loving rule means I will actively pursue his ways. When I am awake in the dark and my imagination kicks into overdrive, tempted to spin negative scenarios out of all of my worries, Jesus is there. He is not calling me to pep-talk myself through my worries in his name, but to turn to him just as I am.
Michelle Van Loon is the author of Moments & Days: How Our Holy Celebrations Shape Our Faith (NavPress). She’s written four books and has been a regular contributor to CT’s Her.meneutics blog. Connect with her at MichelleVanLoon.com, via Facebook, or on Twitter.
