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Pray for the relief workers. That is one of the most important things needed at any time of great disaster.

In the aftermath of the December 26 tsunami, this realization came to me strongly when I heard that one of my colleagues, taking a vanload of things to north Sri Lanka last night, fell asleep at the wheel.

After some anxious moments, the van traveled about 100 yards off the road. But it ended up back on the road, spun around from its original direction. Miraculously, the only damage was two flat tires. Two other aid workers who were traveling east at the time stopped and went to his aid.

During times of disaster, we push ourselves beyond what is healthy for us. That is inevitable. But there is a limit to what our bodies and minds can tolerate. We need to take care and don't neglect the basics of life, physical or spiritual.

Let me mention a few specific matters as priorities during this crisis:

However much we think we can survive on less sleep, sooner or later we must stop to "catch up." Sleep is a basic human need, and if we deprive ourselves of it for too long there will be serious long-term consequences. Driving accidents, careless errors in performing our job, temper tantrums, and burnout are four consequences that come to mind.

During emergency times, how easy it is to neglect our families. It must not be done for too long. Family ties are such that they need constant nurture. They must never be taken for granted. It is no secret that a high percentage of married emergency aid workers have (or had) stormy marriages.

This is a discipline to cultivate: To be busy, but never to give our families the hint that they are not important to us. Families need to meet and talk about the challenges they face. Frequent phone calls are a great help.

There are few things that calm family life as effectively as a time spent together in prayer. However tired we may be, we must work towards being in harmony with our spouses.

The last thing one wants to do when he or she comes home tired is to have a "love fight" with the spouse. But love does require an occasional emotion-taxing fight like that. The glow of love the next morning makes the red eyes that result from the fight well worth it.

Closely related to care of family is the chaos caused within our emotional lives by trauma.

This week, when I was traveling with two colleagues to see our staff worker whose house was destroyed, I mentioned how I suddenly found that I was losing my temper at home.

Both colleagues said the same thing about their home experience. One wife mentioned to a colleague that she and her husband have had a lot of arguments in recent days.

I believe this is a natural reaction. So we can be alert to its possibility and moderate our behavior so that it does not seriously hurt our loved ones.

At such times, we must constantly pray Psalm 141:3: "Set a guard, O Lord, over my mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips!"

We need to discuss this situation with our loved ones so that their hurt is greatly reduced by understanding the dynamics at work. When I told a family member about this a short while ago, she reminded me of situations where I had lost my temper the day before and had not even realized it!

Understanding the dynamics helps us deal constructively with this type of problem.

People like Mother Teresa have shown us that anyone who wants to do crisis ministry long term must have a healthy devotional life.

God has built into our systems a rhythm of life that we must not violate: output and input; work and rest (Sabbath, vacation); service and worship; community activity, family activity, and solitude. Yet it is so easy at a time like this to neglect some of the less active disciplines in this list.

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December (Web-only) 2004, Vol. 48