How do you identify the spiritual needs of people? Do you wait until tragedy strikes and then give counsel? Do you hope that the sermon and education program will cover the bases? Do you try to keep in touch with every person through visitation?
When I started at my church seven years ago, forty people attended worship. I could visit every home at least once a month, visit shut-ins every week, and follow up visitors within the first week. Pastoral care was immediate and fulfilling.
But then things began to change. More people started attending worship, more weekday ministries were added, and a building program was begun. In short, the church came alive. Along with the excitement of growth came a growing sense of frustration. I didn’t have enough time to do pastoral care the way I knew it should be done.
Since I’d once tasted the sweetness of pastoral care, the in-depth, unhurried equipping ministry of the pastorate, all the other things I did in the church seemed shallow and unsatisfying. I discovered that my deepest desire was to provide spiritual care. My ministry gift was to mend brokenness and help people become whole.
But could I do that in the modern, chief-executive-officer pastorate to which we are all sentenced? It takes time to oversee staff, property, and programs. Those cannot be neglected. Further, could any one person really pastor a group of 300 or more?
Pastoring takes time with individuals. What could I reasonably expect of myself, remembering family and my own spiritual growth? I could just try to keep the fires out, responding only to the immediate and urgent. Or I could forget pastoral care and focus on the pulpit ministry. But if I really dealt with the reality that spiritual care takes time, would that mean I must forget study and preparation and give myself to the people?
I still struggle with this. I suppose I always will. But I am getting a handle on some of it, and I present the following idea simply as a help to anyone who would like to use it.
First, I came to grip with some realities. I asked my congregation to provide an administrator to care for property and programs. They agreed. And since the size of the congregation made it difficult for one person to provide all the personal contact needed, we began a Bible Study Training Group to train leaders in the art of leading small home Bible studies.
But that still left me with the desire to do in-depth spiritual care of my people. I thought how useful it would be if people made an appointment with me to talk only about their spiritual lives-not about marriage, children, or current crises, but the current state of their spiritual health.
The idea of health made me think of doctors’ checkups. You don’t go in and tell the doctor what’s wrong and how to treat you. You go in, have some lab work done, and then let the doctor listen, poke, and probe. Then he gives his counsel.
When I compared that with my own approaches to spiritual care of my people, I realized how infrequently I probed into some of the most important questions of spiritual life:
their personal time with God;
their struggles with temptation;
their dependence on money and possessions;
their gifts and whether our church was utilizing them.
Did my people understand my role in their life-that a pastor is not a free psychologist but a spiritual shepherd responsible for them before God? I knew part of the problem was how difficult it is for people to express themselves. And the inexpressible nature of one’s own spiritual walk makes this doubly difficult. Would the analogy of a checkup help?
As my thoughts began to jell, I began to write. I ended up with “A Confidential Spiritual-Life Checkup.” I decided to request an appointment with my people. The purpose of the appointment would be to talk over their spiritual lives. To prepare for this appointment, each individual was asked to do some “lab work.”
As you read the instrument, you will see how I’ve taken the basic functions of blood within the human body and made them analogous to the nurturing, cleansing, helping, and serving aspects of spiritual living. I end the lab report with two questions about tired blood due to imbalanced diet or imbalanced lifestyle, giving a more expanded explanation of my goal in each person’s life.
I had the instrument printed and, during a series on body life three years ago, distributed to my people.
That first spring, I had conversations with some of my people that I had never had in all our years together. It changed my relationship to them in many ways, enhancing the level of sharing and understanding my kind of help. It was beautiful-and it was effective for many.
After about six weeks of seeing persons every day, the appointments slowed down, and I sat down to tally the responses. About 30 percent of my people had come to see me. Many others said they were filling out the lab report, but by the end of summer, all appointments ended.
At first I was disappointed. But then as I reflected, I identified several dynamics at work:
1. Some people never have physical checkups either. I don’t know whether they are afraid they will find out something, or whether they figure that as long as they aren’t in pain they’re not going to worry. Perhaps some people don’t want to know what needs to be changed so they won’t be held accountable. Whatever the reason, some people avoid all checkups.
2. Several people mentioned to me that they wanted to get it all together before they came in. I took that to mean that as they did their lab work, they recognized their areas of need and didn’t really need for me to voice them, or perhaps were even too embarrassed to reveal them.
3. I have not established a pastoral relationship with all my people. I am the preacher to some, the reverend to others, and to still others, I am probably just a nice guy. But there has never been a trust relationship that could carry the weight of such a checkup.
4. Last, and I suspect one of the largest groups, are people who think it is a great idea but just never quite get around to the checkup. They procrastinate.
Over the last three years, I have distributed this instrument to the entire congregation two times. Both times I got about a 30 percent response of people actually going through the appointment. I estimate that 50 or 60 percent actually have done the lab work. The remainder do nothing with it.
For the ones who do use it, it seems to help. And for me as a pastor, there are few experiences as meaningful and fulfilling as pastoring a person through a spiritual-life checkup.
Dennis L. Wayman is pastor of the Free Methodist Church of Santa Barbara, California.
Permission is hereby granted to reproduce the following three pages for use in your local church. Alterations are also permissible. For wider use, please contact LEADERSHIP for authorization.
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A CONFIDENTIAL SPIRITUAL-LIFE CHECKUP
As your pastor, I am responsible for your spiritual health in much the same way as your doctor is responsible for your physical health. Both of us must be allowed the privilege of helping you. Often, unless a disease so overcomes us that our doctor or pastor is made painfully aware of it, there is no regular time when I can sit down with you and discuss the health of your spiritual life.
Therefore I am requesting an appointment with you. I am requesting that you do the following “lab work” not as a test, but as a tool for diagnosis, so that we might know your “blood count” and decide together on a proper diet and exercise program that will bring about your best spiritual health.
Since pastors (or doctors) can help only if we allow them, this is entirely voluntary, but I am suggesting that you:
1. Set aside an hour of uninterrupted time in which to thoughtfully answer these questions.
2. Keep your answers only to yourself, to be shared with me and God alone.
3. Make an appointment with me for a one-hour spiritual check-up.
4. Get your “lab work” answers to me a week in advance for my preparation.
5. Prayerfully and openly meet with me, trusting God to use this experience for you.
I. Blood Type: Are you now a Christian? _____ Comment on your answer:
Have you been baptized? _____ When? __________ Where?
II. Red Blood Cells (oxygen carriers that prevent anemia)
A. Devotional life
1. How meaningful is Sunday morning worship to you?
2. How meaningful is private worship to you?
3. Do you feel you are becoming more acquainted with God? _____ In what ways?
4. Is meditation a part of your spiritual walk? _____ Describe:
B. Intellectual life
1. Are your doubts and questions being answered? _____ If yes, how?
2. Do you feel you know the Bible? _____ What help do you need?
3. Do you understand basic concepts of theology-justification, regeneration, sanctification, gifts of the Spirit, etc.? _____ What help do you need?
4. In what areas of intellectual life (explaining your faith; theology; practical applications; Bible knowledge; body life; etc.) are you strong, and in which are you weak?
III. White Blood Cells (disease fighters for inner spiritual cleansing and renewing)
A. Do you feel you are a more accepting, forgiving, loving person than you have been?
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B. Do you feel you are stronger against temptations (to be impatient, angry, greedy, lustful, etc.)?
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C. Do you feel your self-esteem is healthy? _____
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D. Do you see yourself becoming more pure in motive, thoughts, and lifestyle?
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E. Do you find yourself usually encouraging others or competing with others?
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F. Do you occasionally tear another person down in jest or anger?
What triggers this?
G. How is the Holy Spirit helping you become whole?
IV. Platelets (blood clotters that stanch the wounds of living in a hurting world)
A. Have you found someone to help bear the burdens of life?
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B. Do you find you can share your inner joys, hopes, and dreams?
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C. When someone in jest or in anger tears you down, how do you handle it?
D. When you fail, what happens within you?
E. When you succeed, what happens within you?
V. Blood Pressure (hypertension and exercise)
A. Are you able to turn your finances over to God and tithe, trusting him to supply?
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B. Are you able to turn your vocation over to God to use you how and where he wants?
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C. Are you learning to let go of the desire for things?
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D. Are you able to exercise your gifts within the body of Christ?
What do you see as your gift(s)?
E. Are you able to explain to others in the community why you are a Christian?
Any problems here?
F. How much are you concerned for those who are less fortunate, wanting to share with them the gospel and the helping hand?
G. How concerned are you with injustices and other social evils?
VI. Tired Blood (from imbalanced spiritual diet)
A. Is you life balanced? How do you deal with pressure? Do you have regular time for family, recreation, personal growth, etc.?
B. Do you feel you have a balance of worship, study, and service to stay in shape?
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