Pastors

RESUME STOPPERS

Have you ever wondered why your pastoral resume doesn’t evoke more enthusiasm? Do you ever think, What are those people looking for?

Perhaps the question should be, What aren’t they looking for? because with the numbers of applications pastor nominating committees receive, their first task is to eliminate applicants.

Here, then, as a public service, are statements certain to stop a resume dead in its tracks. We’ll assume you won’t stoop to inserting one into the applications of “colleagues” vying for the position you covet.

“I believe empathy is overrated.”

“In the five churches I have faithfully served over the past two years . . .”

“My hobbies are pit bulls and automatic weapons.”

“I am willing to sacrifice my family for the sake of the ministry. I am also willing to sacrifice yours.”

“I have learned to cope with financial crisis at every church I’ve served.”

“I require an attractive secretary and/or organist.”

“My extensive counseling of church members has proved a rich source of pointed sermon illustrations.”

“Amway taught me everything I know about evangelism.”

“I’ve been told that every sermon I preach is better than the next.”

“My personality has provided me ample opportunity to develop conflict-resolution skills.”

-Dave Wilkinson

Moorpark (California) Presbyterian Church

Copyright © 1991 by the author or Christianity Today/Leadership Journal. Click here for reprint information on Leadership Journal.

Also in this issue

The Leadership Journal archives contain over 35 years of issues. These archives contain a trove of pastoral wisdom, leadership skills, and encouragement for your calling.

Our Latest

News

Northern Seminary Presidential Installation Goes Awry

It’s unclear whether Joy Moore resigned her leadership at the suburban Chicago school.

News

How Abortion Pills Change the Fight for Life

Texas pregnancy centers adjust their services as women increasingly access mifepristone by mail.

‘The Chosen Adventures’ Educates Our Smallest Bible Scholars

The animated spinoff on the adult show is a heady attempt to disciple kids on the life of Jesus.

Review

Suffering Comes in Many Forms. So Does Theodicy.

Scripture attests to God’s distinct plans to wipe individual tears from individual eyes.

The Bulletin

Hamas Crackdown, Rural Hospitals, and Why Brides Wear White

Hamas punishes political enemies, the importance of rural hospitals, and how purity culture influences modern weddings.

Naomi Raine Isn’t Playing Games

The founding member of Maverick City Music is releasing new songs as a solo artist with an impressive roster of guests.

News

Shrinking Palestinian Christian Population Wary of Cease-Fire

“As people, we can live together … because this is what Jesus asked us to do.”

Apple PodcastsDown ArrowDown ArrowDown Arrowarrow_left_altLeft ArrowLeft ArrowRight ArrowRight ArrowRight Arrowarrow_up_altUp ArrowUp ArrowAvailable at Amazoncaret-downCloseCloseEmailEmailExpandExpandExternalExternalFacebookfacebook-squareGiftGiftGooglegoogleGoogle KeephamburgerInstagraminstagram-squareLinkLinklinkedin-squareListenListenListenChristianity TodayCT Creative Studio Logologo_orgMegaphoneMenuMenupausePinterestPlayPlayPocketPodcastRSSRSSSaveSaveSaveSearchSearchsearchSpotifyStitcherTelegramTable of ContentsTable of Contentstwitter-squareWhatsAppXYouTubeYouTube