All About The Big Step

Our children’s ministry periodically offers a class for parents and kids to attend together called “The Big Step.” This 90-minute event features a brief training session for parents, a salvation lesson, discussion time for kids and parents, and even a photo station to create a take-home piece to remember the evening. The class seeks to create time for parents and their kids to have a meaningful discussion about a relationship with Jesus. No pressure exists to make a decision, although we prepare parents for that possibility.

Included on the pages that follow: Invitation text, Class Overview, Parent training comments/script, what we’ve learned from the class, and sample parent comment.

Invitation text:

Big Step class overview:

Doors open, early arrivers have pix taken at photo spot

(5 min.) Sandy (2nd/3rd grade teacher) welcomes everyone. All kids leave with Sandy and work on a craft project (pix frame for photo with parent)

(15 min.) David (Promiseland director) gives parents an overview of evening, provides specific instructions on how they utilize and maximize 1-1 time with kids (see next section), Lisa (Promiseland worship director) sings a special song for parents called “At This Moment.”

(25 min.) Kids return, Jeff (Kindergarten/1st grade teacher) teaches a creative

salvation lesson based on lesson #9 in Flipt Family Experience curriculum [insert link: http://www.willowcreek.com/children/resources_family.asp]

(25 min.) Parents and kids spend time discussing lesson (prompted by materials

provided in Parent Packets distributed earlier; Flipt Family Experience curriculum contains ideas).

If a child is ready to make a decision for Christ, the parent prays with that child (for materials to help parents, see Leading Your Child to Jesus pages 77-82).

(20 min.) Informal music and snacks, rest of attendees have pix taken at photo spot.

(later) Everyone is gone, ministry staff has room cleaned and cleared, Heaven’s celebration for all the decisions continues through the night.

Big Step Parent training comments/script:

Welcome to the Big Step!

Let’s all turn our cell phones off or at least to vibrate.

For the next few minutes while the kids are gone, I’m going to share some information and tips with you that will help this evening be a big win for you and your child.

First, what is success tonight? Here it is: A meaningful conversation between you and your child about what it means to have a relationship with Jesus.

Here’s how the night will run:

Kids doing project—a picture frame, while we chat
When your kids return, Jeff will teach on salvation—explain who, what, why, how of salvation plan and the need for a salvation decision. He will show a powerful video part way through.
Jeff concludes his teaching by handing the evening to you parents—you can spread out in this room, in the hallway, or in the area across the hall to have space for you and your child.
You’ll have a 25 minute period to discuss the salvation lesson plan
To help you do this, you’ll find two tools in the packet you received

A discussion guide that prompts you through conversation, questions
A booklet called “God’s plan for me” that you should go through with your child as an interactive activity to discuss the salvation plan
If you’d like a Bible to look up verses found in the activities, you can borrow one from the cart during discussion time—return it!

If you believe that your child is ready to pray the salvation prayer, you’ll find a guide for how to do just that on your discussion guide—ABC prayer
Promiseland people will be walking around the room if you want to ask a question
At the 25-minute mark, we’ll start playing music in this room, which means the snack tables are open. Please make sure you and your child do not try to get snacks early; the discussion time is too important to waste standing in line for a cookie.
Also, when the music starts, plan to go to the photo op backdrop to have your picture taken. You can pick up a print next weekend at Promiseland Central when you give us your completed evaluation card.
You can feel free to leave at any time after the music starts

Here’s the most important item I have to share with you—don’t leave early, and completely engage with your child for the entire 25 minutes. When you look through the Bible, you’ll see that God does some of his best life-change work in “moments.” Maybe, just maybe, heaven has orchestrated this entire evening for you and your child to experience one of those moments. Kids in Promiseland hear us teach all the time. The fact that you are going to have a conversation with your child afterward is what makes this evening special. As we sat down to develop a goal for this evening, we did not aspire to “convert” a bunch of kids. Rather, the big win for the night is when you and your child have a very deliberate conversation about that which matters most to God—a relationship with him. Because in the midst of this setting—you and your child, eye-to-eye, ear-to-ear, heart-to-heart—wouldn’t it be just like God to do something incredible? Yes, a Big Step for your child might be only a moment away. Please be very present in that moment; they don’t come often, so we need to cherish them when they happen.

We’re going to hear a song that will solidify that thought, then the kids will be back, and Jeff will get started. Let’s get ready for a great night.

Big learning:

Big promotion created big demand. We had to close registrations 1.5 weeks prior to the event because we quickly hit the room capacity. Registration took place primarily via the web, with a few phone-ins. The promotion campaign included a postcard mailed to all K-5th grade households, a card at Easter, and a strong main stage announcement. We could have done much more promotional activity, but didn’t need to. Key learning: strong demand for this type of event exists.
Big participation by those who did attend. Jeff did an excellent job of teaching a creative salvation lesson in slightly less than 25 minutes. Parents were extremely receptive to the specific coaching they received, which showed in how well they engaged with their children in conversations for the 25-minute 1 on 1 time. From conversations and feedback from parents, many read the book suggested as pre-work—and were glad they did. Key learning: The 50-50 split of teaching and family discussion works well. Also, parents are very willing to participate when given clear directions and a compelling reason. Lisa’s song was a win because it gave a great nudge to every parent’s heart.
Big number of decisions. The best, most conservative estimate is that two thirds of all kids prayed a salvation prayer with a parent at the Big Step. Our goal for a successful night was to create an extended “moment” in which parents and kid would have a significant discussion about a faith decision. We never set out with a “number of decisions” goal. When Jeff turned the evening over to the parents, our team watched in awe as hundreds of parents and kids huddled up close and had those discussion “moments.” And it was almost more joy than I could handle every time I saw a mom or dad reach over and grab the hand of a kid and begin to pray—with one eye of the parent open and looking at the ABC prayer on the card we provided! That scene repeated scores of times throughout the evening. Key learning: a reminder that our job is to do ministry the very best we can, and let the Holy Spirit handle the salvation decisions. Seems to work best that way!

Sampling of e-mails received from parents after The Big Step:

Thank you for a wonderful experience.

The book suggested really prepared me and the boys’ grandmother to have the conversation with them on Friday. (They are my grand nephews and were visiting.) I also shared the book with their parents. One of the best insights was on the use of language and how we have to adjust it to the child’s level. All the examples given throughout were great. The presentations and the videos were very helpful.

I brought a nephew who had not been exposed to the Bible and he won one via the raffle. That was soooo exciting and I told him that it was a direct invitation from Jesus. He unwrapped it and began to read it. The other two boys, of course, wanted their own, which they did not have. Two sporadically attend another church and the other does not attend. I have since gotten them the ‘Adventure’ Bible. Anyway, it was great and we celebrated afterwards. Two of the boys asked Jesus to be their forever friend.

* * *

I am so grateful that my daughter and I attended the Big Step. I feel that your book Leading your Child to Jesus really helped to prepare me for our conversation. I still can’t believe she chose that night to start her relationship with Jesus. (I honestly wasn’t expecting it to happen that night.) The excitement she expressed afterwards was priceless.

Thanks again!

* * *

We so appreciate Promiseland giving us the opportunity to be apart of such an important event in our child’s life. Being part of the process gives us [parents] the assurance that our child made the decision on their own, not because of peer pressure or because a friend was “doing it.”

* * *

Thank YOU so much for following God’s lead to bring such a great evening to all of us! During our 25 minutes with our daughter Krista, she said she already asked Jesus to be her forever friend—just the day before! Well, that seemed a little unlikely to me and my husband, but we decided to play it cool and see what would happen over the next few days. We of course told her how happy we were for her, etc. Well, sure enough, Sunday morning she decided to tell me the truth. She said she was scared to make the commitment on Friday because she didn’t know what would happen at church. So I offered to pray with her right there in the bathroom as I was doing her hair. We went through the ABC’s and then prayed to God! She hugged me so hard and thanked me afterward! What a blessing!

I can’t think of a thing I’d change about the Big Step evening. (Except maybe not so many drinks for the kids just before bedtime!)

David Staal, senior editor of Today’s Children’s Ministry, serves as the president of Kids Hope USA, a national non-profit organization that partners local churches with elementary schools to provide mentors for at-risk students. Prior to this assignment, David led Promiseland, the children’s ministry at Willow Creek Community Church in Barrington, Illinois. David is the author of Words Kids Need to Hear (2008) and lives in Grand Haven, MI, with his wife Becky, son Scott, and daughter Erin.