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In director Andrzej Batkowiak's new action film Cradle 2 the Grave (Warner Brothers), a jewel thief (Earl "DMX" Simmons) gets in2 serious trouble when his latest diamond heist goes wrong and his daughter is kidnapped. This God-fearing crook reluctantly agrees 2 help a Taiwanese government agent (Jet Li) track the kidnappers in hopes of saving the girl's life.

The action-packed Cradle topped the box office this week, in spite of reviewers' attempts 2 send it 2 a box office grave. (Okay. Enough.)

Michael Elliott (Movie Parables) describes the film as "all style and no substance … immediately entertaining but ultimately disappointing. There's even a vain attempt at relevance by making superthief DMX a religious man whose love for his daughter borders on the divine. Sorry, but praying to angels to keep one's daughter safe while engaging in criminal activity that puts her in harm's way seems … hypocritical. The makers … try to cater to both sides of man—the sinner and the saint. In doing so, they give nothing of value to either."

Gerri Pare (Catholic News Service) declares, "For all its headache-inducing sound and fury with vicious violence, Cradle … deserves to be buried, the sooner the better."

Pare agrees that the religiosity of the thief makes little sense: "The fact that Tony eagerly steals [is] … downplayed. His tenderness seems to suggest he's really a good guy just trying to make a living, and once his daughter is snatched his determination to rescue her practically puts him in heroic territory."

Shaun Daugherty (Preview) declares, "Any self-respecting person will avoid this film at all costs!"

But conservative critic Michael Medved has a different view: "Cradle … so far exceeds all reasonable expectations that it certainly commands praise. [DMX] could probably handle the sort of substantive assignments most regularly reserved for the likes of Denzel Washington and Cuba Gooding Jr. [The film has] irresistible visual flair … the action scenes unfold with perfect pacing and unexpected immediacy."

Roger Ebert (Chicago Sun-Times), is not so impressed: "The film itself is on autopilot and overdrive at the same time: It does nothing original, but does it very rapidly. I can see that this movie fills a need. I have stopped feeling the need. The problem with action movies is how quickly state-of-the-art becomes off-the-shelf. We yearn for wit and intelligence, and a movie like Shanghai Knights looks sophisticated by comparison."

Another Chicago critic, Robert K. Elder (Chicago Tribune) says, "Most poor-quality cinema simply wastes your time and money, but [this movie] seems to go out of its way to insult your intelligence and social sensibilities. Storytelling like this makes most video game plots look like Moby Dick."

Audrey Tautou, who charmed audiences in the fantastical romantic comedy Amélie, is back in another unusual French concoction. In writer/director Laetitia Colombani's new film He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not (Goldwyn), Tautou plays an art student named Angelique. Angelique's interests reach beyond her painting—she has a crush on Dr. Loic (Samuel Le Bihan), a married cardiologist. In spite of the efforts of an admirer (Clement Sibony) to dissuade her, Angelique stokes the fires of her dream by convincing herself that the marriage will fall apart. When it does not, her passion leads to dismaying extremes. Sound like a routine story of jealousy and unrequited love? Hardly. Just when you think you know where things are going, the 26-year-old Colombani casts the story in a whole new light, confounding all expectations.

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March (Web-only) 2003, Vol. 47