When Deadbeat Dads Are Really Trying

Her.meneutics April 1, 2009

The caricature is so common it’s become a stereotype: the Deadbeat Dad, trying to weasel his way out of paying child support. But what happens when Dad—through no fault of his own—really doesn’t have the money to send?

Family courts around the country are hearing the same story over and over again, according to an article last week in The New York Times: I can’t make my child support payments. Can I have the amount reduced?

“Presented with documentation of falling incomes and rising expenses,” the article goes on to say, “judges often have little choice but to grant the downward adjustments, even in the face of protests from mothers struggling to support children.” Yet for many families, these child-support payments aren’t exactly funding the kids’ weekly allowance or iTunes purchases. This is money that’s going toward rent or groceries.

But what to do? It’s hardly fair to force non-custodial parents—mostly fathers—to make payments they can’t afford, yet most custodial parents aren’t seeing a commensurate drop in their expenses. The resulting gap between income and expenditures leaves families in tight places, as parents—both custodial and non—struggle to find ways to meet their children’s needs in an increasingly tight economy.

In Lee County, Florida, this gap has led to a 77 percent spike in contempt orders when non-custodial parents fail to make timely support payments, according to a recent News Press article. And a contempt order can mean jail time. That’s a tough sentence for a parent who’s trying to do the right thing in the face of layoffs, pay cuts, or unemployment, especially when a court-approved reduction in child support payments can take up to a year to be processed.

It’s a tough situation, regardless of how you look at it. So how can we, as Christians, respond to these parents who are struggling in our churches and communities?

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