Our Lesbian Visitor - Christianity Today

Hey, Pastor, is it okay if I invite a lesbian to church?”

I had been at the church for only four months. I didn’t hesitate: “Of course it is. Jesus didn’t come for the well but for the sick.”

Â The young man who had asked the question hesitated for a minute, then asked, “Really, or are you foolin’ with my mind?”

I told him I didn’t think Jesus would have hindered a first-century homosexual from investigating his claims by following him around. Little did I know what that comment would release in our church.

DO YOU ALLOW GAYS HERE?

The young woman was unable to make it that evening but showed up two weeks later. After the service, she came up and told me that she had just given her heart to the Lord and wondered if it would be all right to “hang around and find out what to do from here.” I assured her that she was welcome and that I was available if she had questions.

Two days later Molly called asking if we could talk. When she came in, she seemed cautious but expressed a love for Jesus and a desire to grow in her faith. Then she cut to the chase. “Before I get my heart all set on falling in love with this place and these incredible people, answer me this: Do you allow gays here?”

I wasn’t ready for that question. I had been raised in a tradition where the “don’t do’s” far outnumbered the “can do’s.”

“I guess that all depends on what your motive for attending is,” I finally said. “If you desire to learn more about a loving God and his ways, and are willing to let God have control of your life, you’re welcome to stay.”

Then I added, “But if I discern that your reason for attending has changed from learning to dividing, proselytizing, justifying, or shocking and shaming the church, I reserve the right to ask you to leave. Is that understood?”

She promised me it was.

GAY BAR MINISTRY

Molly and I had many heart-to-hearts in the months and years to follow. The topics would change but never failed to challenge me with their scope and depth. One thing became increasingly evident: Molly loved Jesus.

Her life changed at a rapid pace, and her vibrant spirit and testimony drew others to ask questions and investigate the dramatic change.

Soon she said God had placed a burden on her heart to “return to her people” and share what God had done for her. She asked if several people in the church would tag along with her to a gay bar she used to frequent. She wanted to be a light to people on their own turf. Several from the church went with her and hung out or drank coffee or made small talk.

Molly explained that gays had been rejected by the church for so long that expecting them to come to the church looking for answers was unrealistic. She thought that if the gospel was powerful enough to save her, it would be powerful enough to protect her while she ministered in the bar.

She was right.

People not only started asking questions, but they also began coming with her to church. Most stopped short of a total surrender to Christ, but they ventured in far enough to witness God’s love through a small but sincere group of people known as the church.

CELIBATE MARRIAGE

Almost two years had passed when Molly asked if we could talk.

“It’s pretty important that I speak to you,” she said.

We set an appointment. I figured her visit would be more of the same: questions regarding the Word, testimonies from the bar ministry, or her struggles during the previous week. So when she asked me about taking a vow of celibacy and devoting her life entirely to the will of God, I was taken back. This good ol’ Pentecostal boy had never had to deal with this before.

“I promise to walk through this with you,” I said, “but I must confess this is all new to me. We’ll be making it up as we go along.”

She was fine with that.

The next several months we fasted and prayed regarding her decision. We studied Scripture, talked about the vows, what they would state, and how they would be implemented. After much discussion and prayer, we set a date and invited guests to witness the celebration of her marriage to God and to full-time service for him.

That day, twelve of us packed into my office; none had ever witnessed such an event. We prayed, and Molly stated her testimony, her gratefulness to God, and her vow.

We wept.

Each one of us took three to five minutes to state what Molly meant to us, and to state for her our love and support of her decision.

We sobbed.

I placed an anklet on her as she pledged her love to God, promising to be faithful to Christ as long as she would live.

I couldn’t hold back the tears.

We laid hands on her and committed her to God. Then we celebrated the occasion with a wedding cake and punch.

Today Molly continues to live a life of unswerving dedication to God. Currently she is doing research for a book she is writing. She called me today, ecstatic that the interviews she had conducted were so informative. I rejoiced with her.

As I hung up the phone, a sense of joy overwhelmed me: joy because Molly had come into our lives, and joy because God had given us the wisdom to let her in.

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Tim E. Wood is pastor of Tacoma Open Bible Church in Tacoma, Washington.

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