Jump directly to the Content

When YOU Do the Rebuking

For Pastors, it's not necessarily easier to give than to receive.

A majority of pastors are "feelers," meaning that the feelings, the dignity, and the approval of people tend to rank high in their decision-making process.

Since I am by nature a "feeler," having to rebuke someone has always been difficult for me. I would rather be rebuked than to rebuke. Why? I struggle with the confidence that my judgment of a person's actions or attitudes is the correct one because I tend to see many sides to every story. I fear the possible loss of a relationship. I do not like to wound people.

The following are principles of rebuke that I have found helpful:

  1. Make sure that there is no way my rebuke can be misunderstood.
  2. Never rebuke someone when my anger is hot.
  3. Don't rebuke in writing or by phone; only face to face (and, if necessary, with a witness).
  4. Don't destroy the other's dignity.
  5. Make sure I have the whole story.
  6. Make sure my own motives and purposes are clarified.
  7. Make sure that I identify the implications of the behavior.
  8. Always provide an opportunity for the person to acknowledge wrong and gain a new start.
Subscriber access only You have reached the end of this Article Preview

To continue reading, subscribe to Christianity Today magazine. Subscribers have full digital access to CT Pastors articles.

December
Support Our Work

Subscribe to CT for less than $4.25/month

Homepage Subscription Panel

Read These Next

Related
HOW DELEGATED WORK BOOMERANGS
HOW DELEGATED WORK BOOMERANGS
It's not enough to delegate work. We need to make sure it stays delegated.
From the Magazine
I Used to Run with Drug Addicts and Prostitutes. Now I Share the Gospel with Them.
I Used to Run with Drug Addicts and Prostitutes. Now I Share the Gospel with Them.
My journey from life on the streets to life in Christ.
Editor's Pick
The Worst (and Best) Passage for Generosity Sermons
The Worst (and Best) Passage for Generosity Sermons
The widow’s mite story is about more than her sacrificial giving.
close