Opinion | Sexuality

Confession: I Stopped Giving to the Church

There's something psychologically important about writing a check and putting it in the plate.

I stopped tithing a few months ago. Okay, no scandal here. I got married in September, and my husband and I moved to a new area and wanted to find a church. As we slowly combined our finances, it became painful. (He's a cheapskate, and I didn't want him to see every pair of earrings I splurged on.)

Within a few months we found a church that we really liked for various reasons. As the new year approached, we resolved to streamline our finances. Eager to get in our giving before 2009 ended for tax purposes, we talked about back-tithing. We decided to tithe the four months we had been married, which felt like a lot of money. It was daunting to put the check in the offering plate and watch the money pulled from our bank account. I then vowed to talk with someone about having our tithing automatically deducted from our account so we wouldn't think twice about it.

On one hand, you could argue, "It's not your money to begin with, so pretend like you never had it." On the other hand, there's something ...

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December

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