The Trumpet Shall Sound When?

We are pleased to announce the first annual “Eutychus Pan-prophetic Conferences,” which will meet for the first time. (Please note the hyphen.) There will be four conferences, each one devoted to a different view of prophecy. At no time will the delegates meet together since there is enough trouble in the world already without adding more. Also, we sell more books this way.

The Amillennial Conference will meet in Rotterdam. Highlight of the conference will be a tour of the tulip fields, directed by a noted Calvinistic scholar, yet to be chosen. Dr. Herrmann von Ritterhavenhorst will give a series of lectures on the real reasons why Calvin never wrote commentaries on Daniel and Revelation.

The Pretribulation Conference will assemble in Dallas and last only one day, although it may seem like a thousand years. We are not revealing the day or the hour, so be prepared. There will be a special display of old prophetic charts, as well as a series of lectures on why pretribs write commentaries only on Daniel and Revelation and ignore the other 64 books of the Bible. All delegates who register early will receive a free pocket calculator for figuring out prophetic dates.

The Midtribulation Conference will last exactly three-and-a-half days, Greenwich time. Several locations are under consideration, including Mount Saint Helen’s, Rome, and Chicago. Music will be provided by “The Uncertain Sound,” a trumpet trio composed of students from three confused seminaries. There will also be a lecture on olive trees and candlesticks, plus a panel discussion on why midtribs write commentaries on only half of Daniel and Revelation.

Finally, the Posttribulation Conference will be held on the Mount of Olives and will last ...

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