Love does not alter the beloved, it alters itself.
Søren Kierekegaard, Philosophical Fragments

The human loves can be glorious images of Divine love. No less that that: but also no more.
C.S. Lewis, The Four Loves

Your body needs to be held and to hold, to be touched and to touch. None of these needs is to be despised, denied, or repressed. But you have to keep searching for your body's deeper need, the need for genuine love. Every time you are able to go beyond the body's superficial desires for love, you are bringing your body home and moving toward integration and unity.
Henri Nouwen, The Inner Voice of Love

We only regard those unions as real examples of love and real marriages in which a fixed and unalterable decision has been taken. … If men or women contemplate. … an escape, they do not collect all their powers for the task. In none of the serious and important tasks of life do we arrange such a "getaway." We cannot love and be limited.
Alfred Adler, What Life Should Mean to You

A covenant cannot be terminated. It can only be violated.
Ross T. Bender, The Conrad Grebel Lectures

What you are as a single person, you will be as a married person, only to a greater degree. Any negative character trait will be intensified in a marriage relationship, because you will feel free to let your guard down—that person has committed himself to you and you no longer have to worry about scaring him off.
Josh McDowell, The Secret of Loving

Whenever anybody asks me a question about divorce, I refuse to answer it until I have first talked about two other subjects, namely, marriage and reconciliation. … For God's purpose is marriage, not divorce, and his gospel is good news of reconciliation. We need to see Scripture as a whole, and not isolate the topic of divorce.
John Stott, Decisive Issues Facing Christians Today

Your marriage is more than a sacred covenant with another person. It is a spiritual discipline designed to help you know God better, trust him more fully, and love him more deeply.
Gary Thomas, Sacred Marriage

One reason God gives us families is that they are laboratories for loving, schools of grace. … If we think of families as schools of grace, we never have to hide family life from God. We can accept God's forgiveness for our failings and let ourselves be bearers of grace to each other. We can bring a chastened, tender humility to our relationships.
Claudia DeVries Beversluis, in My Heart I Offer

Related Elsewhere

Also appearing on our site this week:
The Truth About Sex | Even Christians get seduced by the sexual lies our culture proclaims. (Nov. 13, 2001)
Make Love and Babies | The contraceptive mentality says children are something to be avoided. We're not buying it. (Nov. 9, 2001)
'Be Fruitful and Multiply' | Is this a command or a blessing? (Nov. 9, 2001)

See Christianity Today's sister publication Marriage Partnership.

Past Reflections columns include:

The Word of God (October 22, 2001)
Leadership (October 11, 2001)
Suffering (September 13, 2001)
Change (August 14, 2001)
Living Tradition (July 18, 2001)
Sacred Spaces (June 11, 2001)
Friendship (May 17, 2001)
The Cross (Apr. 12, 2001)
The Quotable Stott (Apr. 27, 2001)

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